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-> Fashion and Beauty
naturalmom5
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 Mon, Jan 11 2021, 11:12 am
| amother [ Rose ] wrote: | | The purpose of a wig is to cover our hair & that we should look like an eishes ish-married women. |
Can you please provide a source for that
Reb Moshe and the Lubavitch Rebbe held if its covered its covered period...
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amother
Rose
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 11:14 am
| naturalmom5 wrote: | Can you please provide a source for that
Reb Moshe and the Lubavitch Rebbe held if its covered its covered period... |
Not everyone holds of these Rabbi's.
Their p'sak is not universal.
Obviously everyone holds differently and has different options on this topic. There's no one correct opinion. I'm honestly tired of having this argument on imamother every few weeks, it never gets anywhere. Everyone should do what they/their Rav hold is right.
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amother
Brown
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 11:16 am
Why not? I would never want to look wiggy. The obvious looking shaitels are very aging.
I do own lace tops. But I usually wear falls with blending my own hair on top and the sides out. This looks natural, youthful. No need to make it obvious.
I would never ask a rav about something like this. He’s not wearing it.
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amother
Pumpkin
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 11:26 am
The way I see it is this:
Some Rabbis hold your hair needs to be covered. Doesn't matter with a wiggy wig, lace top wig, scarf or pot cover. As long as none of your natural hair is showing.
Some Rabbis hold that hair needs to be covered AND it needs to be recognizable that your hair is covered. Once, we start with that, I have a lot of questions and no answers.
Recognizable to whom? Jewish women? Non-Jewish women? Men? All men? Savvy men, who get these things, or spaced out men who won't realize that my mothers 25 year old wig is a wig?
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amother
Aubergine
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 11:52 am
| amother [ Rose ] wrote: | Not everyone holds of these Rabbi's.
Their p'sak is not universal.
Obviously everyone holds differently and has different options on this topic. There's no one correct opinion. I'm honestly tired of having this argument on imamother every few weeks, it never gets anywhere. Everyone should do what they/their Rav hold is right. |
So you should have written "my rav holds the reason is to look like an eishes ish" you cant have it both ways, writing that THE reason is and then saying not every holds by THOSE rabbis....
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amother
Ecru
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 11:54 am
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I know that in Brooklyn and Lakewood this is coming controversial. I know this from this website. Not the first time this is being discussed. I’m from the five towns and everyone getting a new wig is buying lace top. I did ask my rav before buying one (I only thought to ask because I saw on Imamother that it was a shaila!) and he has no prob with it. He said it’s the same thing as 20 years ago when human hair wigs with the skin coloured scalp came out and pp were against it then. Covered is covered. I do understand this as being minhag hamakom though.
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essie14
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 12:05 pm
Covered is covered in my community.
Hair blended into a wig, kippah fall, pocket for your ponytail, scarf with hair showing - it's all allowed as long as your head is covered.
This is obviously community specific (and rabbi specific).
Everyone should AYLOR if they believe this is an issue.
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LakewoodMom2
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 12:08 pm
I recently was in the same dilemma. I was shopping around for a new wig and fell in love with a lace top wig. Because so many people these days wear it, and I knew how bad the wig shortage was, I just gave the shaitel macher a deposit and took it home.
However, the concept of a lace top wig was weighing on me heavily, due to all the noise against it so I called my LOR, who is a considered a prominent Lakewood Rabbi.
His answer: L'halacha, as long as the lace top is fully lined, its the same as any other wig.
Hashkafically, it goes against the whole reasoning of covering your hair to begin with. And being that now, lace tops are still so new, he thinks its wrong on my part to be a "trendsetter" for this idea.
He also told me a chazal that says that hair covering is a crazy segula for having good children.
I decided to be strong about it and not get it.
Now I have been struggling a lot for the last few years with secondary infertility and ectopic pregnancies.
Literally a week after I decided to be strong and give back the wig I loved so much, to mine and my doctor's utter shock, I found out I was pregnant.
Im not someone whos into cheesy hashgacha pratis stories or segulos, but to me this was a clear cut message.
So yes, you can argue technically if whether or not lace top is halachically ok, or not.
But what is more valuable to you - a slightly nicer wig or good children?
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amother
Indigo
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 12:16 pm
| LakewoodMom2 wrote: | I recently was in the same dilemma. I was shopping around for a new wig and fell in love with a lace top wig. Because so many people these days wear it, and I knew how bad the wig shortage was, I just gave the shaitel macher a deposit and took it home.
However, the concept of a lace top wig was weighing on me heavily, due to all the noise against it so I called my LOR, who is a considered a prominent Lakewood Rabbi.
His answer: L'halacha, as long as the lace top is fully lined, its the same as any other wig.
Hashkafically, it goes against the whole reasoning of covering your hair to begin with. And being that now, lace tops are still so new, he thinks its wrong on my part to be a "trendsetter" for this idea.
He also told me a chazal that says that hair covering is a crazy segula for having good children.
I decided to be strong about it and not get it.
Now I have been struggling a lot for the last few years with secondary infertility and ectopic pregnancies.
Literally a week after I decided to be strong and give back the wig I loved so much, to mine and my doctor's utter shock, I found out I was pregnant.
Im not someone whos into cheesy hashgacha pratis stories or segulos, but to me this was a clear cut message.
So yes, you can argue technically if whether or not lace top is halachically ok, or not.
But what is more valuable to you - a slightly nicer wig or good children? |
Besha’a Tovah. What a beautiful story.
As a child of a posek - I think it would be really special to call the rav back and give an update. Many rabbinim like to hear good news. It gives them chizuk too.
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amother
Rose
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 12:18 pm
| amother [ Aubergine ] wrote: | | So you should have written "my rav holds the reason is to look like an eishes ish" you cant have it both ways, writing that THE reason is and then saying not every holds by THOSE rabbis.... |
You're right, I should've written that.
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amother
Taupe
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 12:20 pm
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NO, they're not. In hilchos tznius s'if 4 it says you're not allowed to wear lace-top wigs.
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amother
Rose
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 12:29 pm
| amother [ Taupe ] wrote: | | NO, they're not. In hilchos tznius s'if 4 it says you're not allowed to wear lace-top wigs. |
What does this mean? Are you being sarcastic?
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amother
cornflower
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:00 pm
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Not gonna comment on halacha but if it helps anyone I can almost always tell when a woman is wearing a lace top wig
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amother
Aubergine
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:39 pm
| amother [ Rose ] wrote: | | What does this mean? Are you being sarcastic? |
Obviously
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amother
Rose
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:49 pm
| amother [ Aubergine ] wrote: | | Obviously |
It's distasteful, there are people that hold that they're assur.
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amother
Firebrick
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:51 pm
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amother
Brown
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 2:13 pm
| LakewoodMom2 wrote: | I recently was in the same dilemma. I was shopping around for a new wig and fell in love with a lace top wig. Because so many people these days wear it, and I knew how bad the wig shortage was, I just gave the shaitel macher a deposit and took it home.
However, the concept of a lace top wig was weighing on me heavily, due to all the noise against it so I called my LOR, who is a considered a prominent Lakewood Rabbi.
His answer: L'halacha, as long as the lace top is fully lined, its the same as any other wig.
Hashkafically, it goes against the whole reasoning of covering your hair to begin with. And being that now, lace tops are still so new, he thinks its wrong on my part to be a "trendsetter" for this idea.
He also told me a chazal that says that hair covering is a crazy segula for having good children.
I decided to be strong about it and not get it.
Now I have been struggling a lot for the last few years with secondary infertility and ectopic pregnancies.
Literally a week after I decided to be strong and give back the wig I loved so much, to mine and my doctor's utter shock, I found out I was pregnant.
Im not someone whos into cheesy hashgacha pratis stories or segulos, but to me this was a clear cut message.
So yes, you can argue technically if whether or not lace top is halachically ok, or not.
But what is more valuable to you - a slightly nicer wig or good children? |
Absolutely ridiculous to equate good children with a wig. Are you really going to tell me that all shaitel-wearing women have wonderful good children? Give me a break. Plenty have very difficult situations. And many women who wear lace fronts or falls with hair out have wonderful children.
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amother
Rose
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 2:18 pm
| amother [ Brown ] wrote: | | Absolutely ridiculous to equate good children with a wig. Are you really going to tell me that all shaitel-wearing women have wonderful good children? Give me a break. Plenty have very difficult situations. And many women who wear lace fronts or falls with hair out have wonderful children. |
It's definitely a known segula and many women have seen yeshua's when they took upon themselves to be more stringent with hair covering. It doesn't mean that everyone that is stringent has good kids, but it's definitely a segula. You don't have to believe in it, but don't mock it, especially when a poster shared her personal account.
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amother
Brown
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 2:35 pm
| amother [ Rose ] wrote: | | It's definitely a known segula and many women have seen yeshua's when they took upon themselves to be more stringent with hair covering. It doesn't mean that everyone that is stringent has good kids, but it's definitely a segula. You don't have to believe in it, but don't mock it, especially when a poster shared her personal account. |
Unfortunately it doesn’t work like that. Would be nice if it did but things don’t go this way.
The best we can do is treat people the way we want to be treated. That’s probably the best segulah.
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amother
Pink
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 2:43 pm
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I wear lace top wigs. I also make my own wigs. I can easily tell when women are wearing lace top wigs. I grew up wearing wigs way before I converted, so maybe I just have an eye for it. Idk about it being halachically ok or not (never asked my rabbi).
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