What are your Pesach Minhagim for kids?

HakarasHatov

Mon, Jan 11 2021, 7:53 pm

My husband and I are Baal teshuvah. Up until this year we only had one child to include in the seder. Now we have two. So I have a few questions for you all.

1) In general what are your minhagim regarding the kids for the seder? And or Pesach in general

2) at what age does the youngest take the place of asking the questions,( assuming they are able to speak)?

3)
What is your Minhag for the afikomen?

4) how late do your Little kids stay up seder night?

amother

Turquoise

Mon, Jan 11 2021, 8:15 pm

We have Kah a large family and all of our kids from youngest to oldest ask the Ma Nishtana, also they all steal and hide the Afikomen together and have a ton of fun. We try to involve all of them in the seder and let them each day their Divrei Torah that they learned.

amother

Gold

Mon, Jan 11 2021, 8:18 pm

HakarasHatov wrote:

I have three kids.
All ask the mah nishtana. Youngest goes first. They ger candy for asking questions and participating in the seder. All steak afikoman. All get afikoman presents. they stay up until the end unless they are tired earlier

imasinger

Mon, Jan 11 2021, 8:51 pm

What great questions!

1. Depends on the ages. For littles, everyone singing kadesh urchatz, then kiddush, washing, karpas, and mah nishtana if they can stay up that late, ditto afikoman. For all ages, showing whatever they learned and brought home from school.

2. As soon as they can do it, many have kids as young as 2 doing the intro, or more than one kid doing it.

3. Our minhag is adults hide, kids find and hold for ransome. But all the variations are good and fun.

4. Depends on the kid, and also whether they can nap in the afternoon before seder.

amother

Slategray

Mon, Jan 11 2021, 8:56 pm

HakarasHatov wrote:

1. Same as adults. Stay seated and listen. No playing except for maybe a ages 2-4 who can play quietly with blocks and then be called back to the table when necessary.

Children eat gebrokts on plastic until 9 and can also drink store bought orange juice. This is obviously not during the seder just pesach in general.

2. As soon as they can. We usually have the kids ask together to save time. At 9 they ask by themselves if they are boys, but still together if girls.

3. All kids play along and ask but only child who finds it can actually expect something.

4. The entire seder. Unless it is a baby. But if they are tired at any age I'd allow them to go to sleep.

amother

Silver

Mon, Jan 11 2021, 9:00 pm

I mean no disrespect to OP but it’s my understanding (as FFB) that these are more family ‘traditions’ or MOs than Minhagim. Can you argue that isn’t that what minhagim are? Possibly but minhagim to me are things that have truly been passed down through generations. The stuff you mentioned (as you may know) have as much To do with each family’s ‘culture’ and preferences than anything else. That said I totally get why others responses wood be helpful as you find your way but a lot of this stuff can be figured out each year as your family grows and the kids get older: you don’t need to decide any of it right now

keym

Mon, Jan 11 2021, 9:19 pm

Agreed with a PP that you have to figure out your family's rhythm and what works.
By us, Seder is very special and very kid oriented.
But we focus on the mitzvah of the father (and mother) telling the kids.
Whatever we can sing in a tune, we do.
They all say mah nishtana, youngest to oldest. After they say it, they get a treat. (In some schools, it's a shtick to teach it in many different, exotic languages).
We give out treats during the seder. Chocolate, cake, chips, candy. If they're listening, asking, answering, participating, we'll randomly give nosh.
I hide the Afikomen, and the kids find it. (I'm not a fan of the Chinuch if the kids taking or stealing something from adults). I buy Afikomen presents in advance- a big toy for the little ones, a new game for the older ones for one night and books for the other night.
Seder night is the one night a year that I let the kids bring special Pesach toys to the table and right next to the table so even a 3 year old can listen while they're playing.

I also give out to my younger (under 9) kids apple slices, potato chunks, celery, and hard boiled eggs during Maggid so they're less kvetchy
We let all the kids stay up until they collapse on the couch.

In general, I focus less on ambiance. I know it's great pictures of crystal and china and brand new Shabbos clothing, but I'm so much less anxious and more present if they're wearing older shirts, Shabbos robes and pajamas and plastic. I care less about it getting dirty.