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-> Judaism
-> Halachic Questions and Discussions
amother
OP
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Tue, Mar 23 2021, 11:59 am
I've heard you are not supposed to speak negatively of the deceased. What is the punishment for this and what is the source of this?
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amother
Hotpink
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Tue, Mar 23 2021, 12:00 pm
It's the same as regular lashon hara. There simply isn't an exception for the no longer alive.
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amother
Wheat
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Tue, Mar 23 2021, 12:01 pm
My understanding is that it’s bad because you can never ask the person for forgiveness. I don’t think there is an additional issue for it inherently.
Judaism does not delineate punishments for most of its transgressions.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Mar 23 2021, 12:01 pm
amother [ Hotpink ] wrote: | It's the same as regular lashon hara. There simply isn't an exception for the no longer alive. |
I thought there is an extra concept of not speaking poorly of the deceased, even if warranted.
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amother
Hotpink
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Tue, Mar 23 2021, 12:03 pm
It's worse to speak lashon hara against someone who can't speak for themself, but that is simply an aggravating factor.
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amother
Olive
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Tue, Mar 23 2021, 12:25 pm
I was also wondering about this. We had a camp director that tortured the life out of many girls. Most girls have such bad memories of her. It's so hard not to talk about it, especially when the family wants to collect good memories about her but she caused so many people so much pain. It's hard not to say anything.
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amother
Pink
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Tue, Mar 23 2021, 12:51 pm
amother [ Olive ] wrote: | I was also wondering about this. We had a camp director that tortured the life out of many girls. Most girls have such bad memories of her. It's so hard not to talk about it, especially when the family wants to collect good memories about her but she caused so many people so much pain. It's hard not to say anything. | lifum tzaarah agra 🤗
But if you need to share for mental health reasons then it may be considered letoeles. It might be worth reviewing hilchos shmiras halashon so you figure out what you can say to who.
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amother
Seashell
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Tue, Mar 23 2021, 12:52 pm
amother [ Olive ] wrote: | I was also wondering about this. We had a camp director that tortured the life out of many girls. Most girls have such bad memories of her. It's so hard not to talk about it, especially when the family wants to collect good memories about her but she caused so many people so much pain. It's hard not to say anything. |
So hard amother olive. I feel for you. Someone who brought pain into my life and hurt people I love is dead. I always avoided saying anything but now that he's gone it makes me feel sick when I have to hear what a tzaddik he was. I try to avoid certain people and situations but it's not always possible because was family member.
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azn722
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Wed, Mar 31 2021, 1:11 am
So interesting- I literally just read this Halacha in my daily shmiras halashon study
Yes it’s not allowed - I found this one tough actually
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