Twin moms HELP! Stressed about how I'll manage with twins!!

English3

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 2:14 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

mazel tov to you!

so smart the color coded bottles. And the night system. But don't understand completely.
You prepared the hot water before in the bottles and then how did you heat them? What is a formula divider?

If they need 120ml of water(sorry I am English) I would fill it with 90 ml and added 30 ml of hot water when they wake up, like that the bottle is the perfect temperature without a screaming baby waiting for the bottle to cool down.hotwater is prepared in a thermos flask the cooled water is in the bottles ready for the feed.
This is the link of the formula divider. Best investment,Whenever I go out it's always enough for three feeds
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Heali.....82K7Q
If you can go to a kimputerim heim go but I would rather go to parents and save up for a night nurse

amother

Bisque

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 3:31 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

you mean you had the night nurse only some nights?

and wow, that must've been rough the NICU part.
Who stayed with the other baby at home while you visited?

So my twins were born shortly after rosh hashana so I stayed at my mother unstick after sukkos and that helped. If she wasn’t watching the other baby while we went to the nicu, we took him along. There was a small family room for nicu families and we would take turns staying there with him and seeing the other baby. It wasn’t too hard since he was so small he was pretty much just sleeping the whole time.

I tried nursing. But I was also running around. No one told me that if you don’t eat and take care of yourself you lose your milk...
And I had to supplement with formula anyway bc they were born very small. So I tried my best and pumped a bunch and then stopped. If someone was going to watch my babies at night I would rather sleep six hours straight then wake up and nurse. I needed to think of myself as well.

Yes, the nurse came only a few nights. We had a limited budget and ‘saved’ her for a break for ourselves.
I did the first part of the night and DH did the second bc he had to go work (so for him it was just waking up really early but still getting sleep).

But the best thing for my sanity was sleep training them. But that was only at six months...

amother

Firebrick

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 3:46 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Firebrick, did you not have a nurse at all?

Nope, like I said I had my sister for a week and then nothing. It was hard, I won't deny it, but then again I had toddlers aside for the twins and I didn't have all of my insights then!

My twins were full term, so no hospital stay, which I'm sure made things MUCH easier.

I did tandem nurse since that was important to me, but started them on solids early (well early for me, 7 months) since they weren't as chubby as my other kids.

amother

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 3:49 pm

amother [ Firebrick ] wrote:

wow, and with toddlers!!

Since you seem to have a bunch of great wisdom do you have any tandem nursing tricks up your sleeve as well?

amother

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 3:53 pm

amother [ Bisque ] wrote:

wow, you dealt with a lot!

and totally your sleep is so important.

Can you share what sleep training method you used? (lol, I know I'm getting wayyy ahead of myself)

I can see how that would be a huge sanity saver.

amother

Firebrick

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 4:10 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

wow, and with toddlers!!

Since you seem to have a bunch of great wisdom do you have any tandem nursing tricks up your sleeve as well?

I was lucky because I had a lactation consultant with my first that taught me a bunch of nursing holds. So I was able to try out a few different ways of nursing both at the same time. I had one across my lap and one on my side in the football hold. (They overlapped each other but it didn't seem to bother them.) Also I had nursed my other babies so I was more experienced.

I bought a nursing pillow (Breast Friend I think) but it didn't work for me, so I returned it. The double Boppy probably would have worked better for me in hindsight, but I just used pillows until they were older.

For tandem nursing at night, I'd stack the swaddled babies with a thin pillow between and lie down on my side to nurse. Sounds complicated but for the nights I needed it (not all the time) it was amazing!

I didn't mention swaddles earlier, but that was really really helpful for me, especially for nursing so they stayed in one place. I used the Miracle Blanket, but there are a lot of great options these days.

In short, get a lactation consultant to help you figure out the easiest way to do it for you, and to make sure they're latching on right. You'll save yourself a lot of headaches! If you can't nurse them both at once, don't give up - you'll probably get it after a little while.

I nurse on demand, I'm not a very scheduled person. It might have been easier to schedule them, but it's not my speed, and going with the flow worked for us.

amother

Gold

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 4:40 pm

Mazel tov! And enjoy the ride.
Here’s my tips-
Take more help than you can afford (you’ll thank yourself later) and when you can’t afford the unaffordable anymore make sure the nurse helps you sleep train them before shes gone.
I moved when I had my twins because I knew it would be too difficult to have a nurse in a small apt and nowhere to put her. You will probably have to move out of a one bedroom apt soom enough with 2 babies...
If they are born doing well start sleep training at like 10-12 weeks, consult with your doc first.
The most trusted book by moms of multiples is “12 hours by 12 weeks” (by me I started later and they were sleeping 10 hours a night by 4 months and 12-13 hours by 6 months and keeping it up 2 years later. It is my lifesaver) just a side note- this book works better with bottle fed babies because its easier to keep track of feedings.
Don’t feel pressured to nurse just because others do. You will most likely need to supplement with bottles between the two babies so if it’s overwhelming you too much reconsider it.
And remember its double the trouble but triple the nachas!!
😍

amother

Puce

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 5:13 pm

Following!!! I had my twins three weeks ago at 36 weeks via c section, no NICU Bh. They came home with me. I had every intension of getting a nurse but for a number of reasons it didn’t work out. And we’re managing. These are not my firsts, and so far they’ve been super sleepy which is easier than screamers... I’m nursing each baby every other feeding and giving formula bottles for the alternate feedings for the other baby. So far it’s been working. But we haven’t had much routine yet due to pesach so we’ll see how things will work out... I do have full time cleaning help Bh...

amother

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 6:04 pm

amother [ Firebrick ] wrote:

thanks so much your advice is gold, Firebrick.
Your advice resonates because I'm also not much of a schedule person and I think it would stress me out having to put them on a schedule fast.

and lol I'm trying to imagine those stacked babies!!

gotcha about lactation consultant. I was under the impression that a lactation consultant visits new moms in hospital by default... or is that not the case? Or do you need to supplement for that?

amother

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 6:07 pm

amother [ Gold ] wrote:

thanks gold!!

Yeah the moving part is another addition to my worries ha ha. I thought about moving during pregnancy but I'm achy and fat and exhausted and I just can't think of doing it now. As soon as they're born is also not a good time. I guess once they're a few months... I'll just be forced to go for it. Though probably won't be any easier than now.

amother

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 6:07 pm

amother [ Puce ] wrote:

mazel tov to you! Hatzlacha!

amother

Azure

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 10:56 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

thanks! I am really excited about the cuteness factor!
So true - "it's allowed to be hard and yummy at the same time"

Did one of your babies need to stay in the NICU?

And I definitely am open to bottle feeding though I plan to at least give breastfeeding a shot.

Have any of you twin moms managed to do tandem breastfeeding? Or is that totally unrealistic?

I strictly nursed them (no bottles). I weaned them when they were two years old. However, I have a few older kids before my twins so I have experience with nursing. If they were my first babies I would not have been so strict with myself about not giving them formula because it can be difficult for both mom and baby to get the hang of nursing if the its the mothers first time. I most def would have given formula to supplement the breastmilk (I hate pumping).

amother

Azure

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 10:59 pm

amother [ Firebrick ] wrote:

I also tired and returned the twin sized brest friend nursing pillow. it was too cumbersome to use with my twins. I nursed my twins in cradle positions, like in the crook of my elbows, facing each other. when they were very little and couldn't hold up their heads I needed my husband to stick pillows under my elbows to help hold them up.

TwinsMommy

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 11:54 pm

reading imamother threads I sometimes feel like I'm the only twin mom (they're 14 now) who didn't have a nurse or go to family or a kimpterin home. Infancy was the easiest stage for me. They couldn't MOVE yet. Smile

Fed them both together, always. In later years they developed very different preferences, personalities, and schedules (oh my goodness--- one twin gave up a second nap LONG before the other and gave up napping altogether LONG before the other......).

amother

Azure

Mon, Apr 05 2021, 11:56 pm

TwinsMommy wrote:

I didn't do any of the above with my twins either but my mom came to me.

amother

Slategray

Tue, Apr 06 2021, 4:56 am

TwinsMommy wrote:

You are not the only one!
My twins are 3 months... Still in survival mode here