Help me overcome my guilt

amother

Phlox

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 4:21 pm

amother [ Caramel ] wrote:

There’s someone in Cleveland who can make allergies go away. He’s also a chiropractor. I have no idea how he makes it go away. He works with famous people and sports teams.

My DH is from there and he helped his entire family. Dh says he knows many other people helped by him as well, says it’s worth traveling to Cleveland.

His name Gregory Kempf.

I don’t usually post about others services but when I saw the long list of allergies I felt so bad OP and remembered dh mentioned they went to this guy and knew I had to post.

I looked up this doctor because my dc is also alergic to several things. It seams the doctor practices NAET. And there is a website to look up practitioners practicing NAET so you can see if someone practices close to you.

https://www.naet.com/practitioner-locator/

amother

Ultramarine

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 4:31 pm

Personally, I’d be thrilled if schools banned dairy because it’s awful for my kids (and most kids) even though they are not technically allergic. But that’s not happening anytime soon because of the dairy industry’s close ties with school lunch program. FWIW I have an anaphylactic child, just not to dairy.

amother

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 5:42 pm

So this is the doctor's perspective:

He thinks it's important to keep the kid in the playgroup because we don't want to make kids different, and it's important for their social/emotional wellbeing.

He thinks I can nicely ask the other mothers to refrain from sending dairy if possible, there's nothing wrong with that. There's also nothing wrong if they say no.

As long as the teacher keeps them separate by mealtimes and wipes the table very well after mealtimes. He also liked the idea of picking him up before lunchtime.

He said that my house is also like a playground, I have several little kids that could leave dangerous foods around and it's not like I'm everywhere watching them all the time. Mistakes can and do happen.
Whereas the teacher is supposed to be focusing on the kids the entire time.

He thought it was a good idea to banish dairy from the house for the time being.

He also said that I need to look at each of his allergies with the same seriousness. It's not like dairy is the worst one, even though I haven't seen any reaction to the fish and sesame; it could be because he was never exposed.

Finally he said that it's a myth about milk allergy being airborne. Certain allergens can be airborne but not milk.

amother

Tangerine

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 5:49 pm

I have an allergic kid that's also a picky eater. I would be very upset if someone asked me nicely not to bring in dairy because that's about the only protein he can eat besides fleishigs but dc would never eat that cold.

I understand your fears, though, because I had them too. I did send to a playgroup where the morah made lunch and there was much more control over what was coming in. She was a wonderful morah and she made egg free pancakes, pasta, etc. Afternoon Snack time in the beginning was a problem because kids brought in their own snack, and my DC did have an allergic reaction despite being on a different table. It's very possible DC picked something off the floor. So I used to pick up DC earlier.

amother

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 6:02 pm

amother [ Tangerine ] wrote:

I hear you.
Would it be different if the morah asked you? You would probably feel more comfortable telling her no than the mother, no?

amother

Marigold

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 6:23 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

I hear you.
Would it be different if the morah asked you? You would probably feel more comfortable telling her no than the mother, no?

I would definitely feel more comfortable telling the morah over the parent. And full disclosure if the morah implemented a dairy free rule mid year I would pull out. It would not be possible for me and lots of others I know as well.

amother

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 6:53 pm

amother [ Marigold ] wrote:

I hear.

amother

Blushpink

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 8:01 pm

OP, I have a child who is allergic to very many things. I did pull her out of daycare, because she was being exposed to too many allergens on a daily basis and I felt it was having too much of a negative impact on her overall health. And my child doesn't ever eat anything without asking first, it was just being around all the allergens and other little kids with possibly dirty hands/faces. I also felt that the teacher wasn't being careful enough.
If you feel the teacher is responsible enough, and is willing to do the work to keep your child safe - only allow food at the table, keep your child at a safe distance, wash children and surfaces after meals - then I would say leave your child there without asking the other parents to stop sending dairy. The exception would maybe be milk in a baby bottle if the child bringing it is not an infant because that's easy to spray around and get all over the place.

amother

Blushpink

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 8:04 pm

Regarding schools, one of my children was in a school that did not allow any outside food into school premises, including the school bus. The school provided breakfast, lunch, and snacks. I thought it was amazing and I wish more schools would implement this policy. (This was a general policy for all the preschool aged kids every year, even if there weren't any children with severe allergies at any given time. )

amother

Violet

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 8:19 pm

I didn't read all 4 pages but I think the only way it could work is if morah makes fleishig/parve food for everyone!
Mothers could contribute towards the cost of food(or buy supply items if it's easier for them) and you would pay for the rest(if morah is willing to have the extra work!)
Kids do eat better when they ask have the same food. I personally think it's healthier to eat a little bit of chicken and potatoes rather than yogurt and pizza!
Obviously a huge change so everyone has to be on board!

lfab

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 9:04 pm

amother [ Hosta ] wrote:

I agree. Also mom of allergy kids. You can’t ask people not to send dairy. Peanut you can but not dairy.

I agree with this, especially for kids this age. My toddler drinks a lot of milk. I would not be able to send her to a playgroup that didn't allow any dairy. If it was for slightly older kids (3/4 year olds) that would be different. But as toddlers it's very typical for them to still drink several cups of milk during the day and many of them (including mine who are picky eaters) still get a lot of their nutrition from the milk they drink.

amother

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 10:04 pm

amother [ Violet ] wrote:

Yeah, this wouldn't work in this situation. The gan is not in her house, it's in a room in a shul.

amother

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 10:08 pm

So I spoke with the morah. I told her I dont think its fair to ask mothers not to bring dairy. I told her that I don't want the mothers to be upset at her.

I said that as long as my son sits in the high chair during mealtimes and she wipes the table very well after lunch, and everyone's hands and faces, it should be okay. She said she does that already.

Im also considering the option to pick him up before lunch.

dankbar

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 10:59 pm

amother [ Lilac ] wrote:

I personally wouldn't mind. There are different protein options such as tuna, egg, salmon spread.

My child can drink his milk at home.

But her son is also allergic to fish, eggs. You can never know when a reaction can be harsh instead of mild. Chas vsholom.

dankbar

Mon, Oct 04 2021, 11:03 pm

My toddler needs her formula bottle (milk based) for soothing like before nap etc. Also she patchkes with her food, so when she has her formula bottle I am not so concerned, if she didn't eat so well, as long as she got some nutrition. I will sometimes purposefully give her a bottle after a meal that didn't go so well.