Monetizing or exploiting tragedies

amother

Tue, Dec 14 2021, 10:54 pm

I am repulsed by how some people on Instagram make tragedies all about them.

I don’t even know how to put my thoughts into words.

But, don’t take someone else’s moment of pain to gain audiences for yourself. We don’t look at Instagram to see you cry.
Don’t pretend that you know why god makes tragedies happen, and make a whole live about it when you are barely religious anymore at all.

It’s literally grade school level to cash in on attention through someone else’s pain.

amother

Feverfew

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 12:02 am

I think some ppl were sincere.

Like someone talking about losing her brother at age 16 to a drunk driver.

Or someone who said she dressed tzinius and covered her hair fully that day as a zechus. I think she was sincere when talking about trying to cover fully always but it’s a struggle.

I also think some ppl aren’t emotionally able to talk about it and get bashed for ignoring.

It’s like your d*mned if you do (not sincere) and d*mned if you don’t (don’t care)

amother

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 12:16 am

amother [ Feverfew ] wrote:

I don’t mean to say that no one is sincere.
Of course there are people who are. We’re one family and we feel pain.
Doing something as a zchus and sharing isn’t monetizing it.
There are those that clearly felt along with the pain and shared their pain. And then there are those who took it a step further…

I had a girl in my grade 4 class that was very sick for a while. There were her friends that were sad, there were those that dealt with their pain privately and then there were those girls who never had said a word to her before that all of the sudden thought they were her best friends. Just attracted to the attention.
Those are the ones that I’m being bothered by.

fbc

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 3:20 am

So I dunno if we follow any of the same people, but I think most of the influencers I saw were very sincere. The one thing that does bother me though, is when they are watching the levaya (I'm guessing on another screen), and storying themselves crying while watching. Like, really? Does it show you're special that you feel so touched by it, that you're crying along with those in pain? What's the point of videoing yourself crying through a levaya? Would you do that if you were personally there?? That kinda turns me off. But I will say, I will continue to follow this specific person for all the good she does. I do know she's generally sincere, I think this was just a poor judgement call, and I have seen other influencers do it as well.

amother

Cerulean

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 8:04 am

Influencers are all about their views. Kinda hard to know who is sincere anymore. Definitely strange seeing people pick and choose what mitzvot they want to keep so publicly, but I guess we all do that to some extent in our own lives too.

amother

Bluebell

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 8:26 am

Can I ask a tricky question? I'll duck for the tomatoes. They started a tzedaka fund for the woman who is very ill, may she have a complete refuah speedily. I think they started with a goal of 350k. I think they are getting close to a million now. At what point do we say maybe she MIGHT not need all this money and it would be better served going to others? Again, I understand she might need it, but we really don't know. Does the fund ever stop or does it continue endlessly?

amother

Cerulean

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 8:43 am

amother [ Bluebell ] wrote:

Honestly I don't have a problem with this. Unfortunately she may need it. In any case I'm sure the money distribution is overseen by those endorsing it.

justmarried:)

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 8:44 am

This women is prob going to need all the money raised. She is a single mother thats has a very long recovery ahead of her. Her children (she has 3) prob need counseling, needs house hold help, rent,tuition, food,
Medical expenses the list is endless and life is expensive. I dont see anything wrong with raising as much as possible now.

Last edited by justmarried:) on Wed, Dec 15 2021, 8:56 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

Cinnamon

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:16 am

amother [ Bluebell ] wrote:

I disagree
Take advantage of the attention and fundraise the heck out of it. In 2 years she will still have bills but people will have forgotten.

amother

Cherry

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:28 am

Wouldn’t the insurance company pay for all of her medical expenses? From the drunk driver? It seems a pretty slam dunk case and that’s what insurance is for.

I understand the helpless feeling to just do something, but I remember the social media crowd fundraising a million for someone else who also went through a tragedy and she needed money, sure, but not that kind of money. There’s so much need it makes me sad that some people’s need never gets heard because it’s not in the news.

HonesttoGod

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:32 am

fbc wrote:

Omg that made me physically nauseous. Like we don’t need to see you boomerang you crying and then tel us how you had the eyelashes done so that they looked so good while you cried. Seriously. We don’t.

As for the insurance pay out she’ll probably get it but it can take ages and ages to process. There are so many immediate expenses until that happens.

amother

Burlywood

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:33 am

amother [ Cherry ] wrote:

I don’t think it takes away from anyone though. These people specifically wanted to give to her. They won’t not give others because of it. Everyone saw the goal was reached but they chose to keep giving.

amother

Bluebell

Wed, Dec 15 2021, 10:33 am

amother [ Cinnamon ] wrote:

I disagree
Take advantage of the attention and fundraise the heck out of it. In 2 years she will still have bills but people will have forgotten.

I understand and agree. But let's say she earned 50k a year. She's a makeup artist. A million dollars is a full 20 years income. Who knows, maybe she'll need it. But there's a reason the fundraiser started at 350k. Should we collect 20 years income for her? What about 30 years income? 50 years? What's that right amount and what's too much? May she have a complete refuah.