 |
|
 |
 |
|
|
Forum
-> Shopping
Ema of 5
|
 Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:08 pm
| amother [ DarkGreen ] wrote: | Because as much as we learn as kallahs, and as appropriate as it is to remove all stray hairs, take it from any mikvah lady: a lose hair is not a chatzitza. The real issue with hair is it getting stuck in the filter and making the cleaning job harder. The rabbonim in the community I am in (in NYC) agree with this and said to remove the full length mirrors.
And pro-tip - put on your robe BEFORE brushing your hair out, then the stray hairs will stay on the robe and not on your body. |
It’s not a chatzitza, but part of the prep is doing a check of your entire body. I was taught that you need to do a full check, and then anything that’s there after that check isn’t a chatzitza. But you need to check.
I brush my hair in the shower, and sometimes it gets stuck on my body.
| |
|
| Back to top |
 9
|
|
amother
Oatmeal
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:08 pm
| Ema of 4 wrote: | | You can look all the way down your back? |
No, but the mikvah lady can. And if you wear a robe when brushing your hair, it's not getting on your body anyhow.
| |
|
| Back to top |
2
|
Ema of 5
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:09 pm
| amother [ Oatmeal ] wrote: | | No, but the mikvah lady can. And if you wear a robe when brushing your hair, it's not getting on your body anyhow. |
I comb out my hair in the shower, under running water, otherwise it gets dry and can break.
| |
|
| Back to top |
7
|
|
amother
DarkGreen
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:09 pm
| Ema of 4 wrote: | | What? It’s not tzanua to see your own body? And aren’t you supposed to check your whole body? I don’t stare at myself, and I hate looking at my naked body in the mirror, but the only way to see if I have air in certain places (my lower back, the back of my legs) is to look in a full length mirror. How is there nowhere else to look in a Mikvah prep room? I’m sorry, this is just really rubbing me the wrong way. |
I am with you on that. I think it was a generational thing because the older generation who are still regular users are the ones who don’t want the mirrors and the younger generation does.
| |
|
| Back to top |
1
|
Ema of 5
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:10 pm
| amother [ Oatmeal ] wrote: | | No, but the mikvah lady can. And if you wear a robe when brushing your hair, it's not getting on your body anyhow. |
The Mikva lady is not checking me beyond an inch or two past my shoulders, and she certainly isn’t checking my legs.
| |
|
| Back to top |
12
|
Ema of 5
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:10 pm
| amother [ DarkGreen ] wrote: | | I am with you on that. I think it was a generational thing because the older generation who are still regular users are the ones who don’t want the mirrors and the younger generation does. |
I’ll be 40 on my next birthday….am I older or younger generation?
| |
|
| Back to top |
4
|
|
amother
DarkGreen
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:11 pm
| Ema of 4 wrote: | | I’ll be 40 on my next birthday….am I older or younger generation? |
I am 40 and we are in the middle.
| |
|
| Back to top |
1
|
Bnei Berak 10
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:15 pm
| amother [ DarkGreen ] wrote: | Anon because this is specific to me.
I manage a mikvah. We were told to remove the full length mirrors from the prep rooms (and only have ones to check your face) because many women felt it was not tzanuah to have to be that close to a full length mirror and see themselves naked with no where else to look. Which is all sorts of messed up but whatever.
So I imagine the same goes for some frum clothing stores. Women do not want to be in a small area with no where else to look but at a mirror where they will see themselves undressed. Truth is, I am overweight and I get kind of down when I see myself undressed and it does not put me in the best mindset to spend on myself, it more makes me think "you are a fat pig, you should lose weight and not buy things now". So I can see a thought that it's better for spenders to see themselves only looking fab in the new clothes and not undressed, so they put a mirror right outside the dressing room.
Not saying I agree, but it's what I bet the thought is. |
It's something very messed up when a woman cant even see herself naked in the mirror in a prep room. For heaven's sake, it's for your own benefit for you to inspector yourself in performing a mitzvah.
I'm all for tzniout (yes, rav falk is in my bookcase) but this is IMHO totally distorted tzniout that is bordering on body shaming.
| |
|
| Back to top |
31
|
Ema of 5
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:15 pm
| amother [ DarkGreen ] wrote: | | I am 40 and we are in the middle. |
I was nervous you were going to say older generation!!
| |
|
| Back to top |
3
|
|
amother
Oldlace
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:16 pm
| amother [ DarkGreen ] wrote: | Because as much as we learn as kallahs, and as appropriate as it is to remove all stray hairs, take it from any mikvah lady: a lose hair is not a chatzitza. The real issue with hair is it getting stuck in the filter and making the cleaning job harder. The rabbonim in the community I am in (in NYC) agree with this and said to remove the full length mirrors.
And pro-tip - put on your robe BEFORE brushing your hair out, then the stray hairs will stay on the robe and not on your body. |
My hair is curly and long. I brush it mainly in the shower and find stray hairs sticking to me from the water.
I'd like to ask my Rav. Sounds interesting. Than why do we freak out if we have anything else on us? If hair is detached from your body and stray why is that fine but a peice of dirt or something isn't? What's the difference?
| |
|
| Back to top |
6
|
Ema of 5
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:16 pm
| Bnei Berak 10 wrote: | It's something very messed up when a woman cant even see herself naked in the mirror in a prep room. For heaven's sake, it's for your own benefit for you to inspector yourself in performing a mitzvah.
I'm all for tzniout (yes, rav falk is in my bookcase) but this is IMHO totally distorted tzniout that is bordering on body shaming. |
I agree, it’s a complete distortion of what tznius is….
| |
|
| Back to top |
11
|
Ema of 5
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:16 pm
| amother [ Oldlace ] wrote: | | My hair is curly and long. I brush it mainly in the shower and find stray hairs sticking to me from the water. |
Same, but don’t forget thick too!!
| |
|
| Back to top |
4
|
|
amother
Oldlace
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:18 pm
| amother [ Oatmeal ] wrote: | | No, but the mikvah lady can. And if you wear a robe when brushing your hair, it's not getting on your body anyhow. |
I have other hard to see places on my front. I'm not getting naked for the mikvah lady to look at my whole body.
| |
|
| Back to top |
10
|
out-of-towner
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:19 pm
|
I have another reason to have mirrors in the dressing rooms: I don't want random men (store owners/workers, fathers and husband's that may come with customers, or even random passerbys) to see me in something that I may not feel 100% Tznius in, either because I'm not sure if it's Tznius and need to confirm in the mirror, or if it would be Tznius if it had the proper shell and undergarments on, or if my head maynot be covered the way that I need it to be.
| |
|
| Back to top |
13
|
|
amother
Coffee
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:21 pm
I don't think you halachically need a mirror to inspect your whole body. I learned that you inspect visually where you can see and and use your hands/fingers to check where you cannot see.
That being said, I find it strange that people don't want full length mirrors at the mikvah. They are quite useful.
| |
|
| Back to top |
12
|
|
amother
DarkGreen
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:26 pm
| amother [ Oldlace ] wrote: | My hair is curly and long. I brush it mainly in the shower and find stray hairs sticking to me from the water.
I'd like to ask my Rav. Sounds interesting. Than why do we freak out if we have anything else on us? If hair is detached from your body and stray why is that fine but a peice of dirt or something isn't? What's the difference? |
We do not freak out. Some women are very anxious because of how they were taught, and made worse by how women talk to each other about it. There are very few things which are a true chatzitza, and a stray hair is not one of them (unless you are chassidish and hold any hair is chatzitza I guess).
Women want different things from their mikvah ladies. Read this board to find see this. Many want us to just come in and say kosher if it's kosher. But if we get the change to educate a women who wants to learn, we take the chance. I've calmed down many women. I've had many women come back to the mikvah at late hours because they saw something, I tell them my thought (because obviously I can not tell them what to do), have them call their rav and sure enough I am right; just about never does a women have to re-immerse. As for a "piece of dirt" being a chatzitza - define a piece of dirt. It's a huge category really. Paint on the skin = chatzitza. Ink in the skin (like sharpy) = try your best to remove it, please do not use bleach (another thing the older generation love and we stock it for them), and dip with it once it is not coming off with a good scrubbing.
No one should freak out about anything.
| |
|
| Back to top |
7
|
|
amother
DarkGreen
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:29 pm
| Ema of 4 wrote: | | I agree, it’s a complete distortion of what tznius is…. |
I agree with you a million percent. BH the younger generation is not learning the same things in this regard.
| |
|
| Back to top |
2
|
Bnei Berak 10
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:29 pm
| amother [ Oldlace ] wrote: | | I have other hard to see places on my front. I'm not getting naked for the mikvah lady to look at my whole body. |
I'm the opposite. I will comply with everything and have no problem with that.
Once I was even asked if an additional mikva lady could join (she was in training, had completed the course). I said sure no problem 
Mikva ladies have seen all types of bodies and sizes
| |
|
| Back to top |
2
|
|
amother
Oatmeal
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:31 pm
| amother [ Coffee ] wrote: | I don't think you halachically need a mirror to inspect your whole body. I learned that you inspect visually where you can see and and use your hands/fingers to check where you cannot see.
That being said, I find it strange that people don't want full length mirrors at the mikvah. They are quite useful. |
Of course you don't need a mirror. For most of history, mirrors didn't exist. And then they were insanely expensive.
Generations of Jewish women combed out their long hair as best they could, looked over their bodies and toveled.
| |
|
| Back to top |
3
|
|
amother
Rose
|
Wed, Jan 19 2022, 12:34 pm
We all agree with the OP...
Yet, how many have actually told the store owners?
I have and will continue to do so.
If the potential customers don't say anything to them but just to everyone else..well then...
I see this on a constant basis. With any variety of problems: People talk about an issue with all-aside from the subject at hand, who is the one who can and needs to make the change. (Or not, and then you can continue to be uncomfortable or not shop there, lol)!
Speak up when necessary all you wonderful women! Be heard.
| |
|
| Back to top |
9
|
| Related Topics |
Replies |
Last Post |
|
|
Brooklyn- gemach for YT clothing open tomorrow?
|
3 |
Sun, Apr 21 2024, 12:58 am  |
|
|
What is the best store bought non-gebrokts cracker?
|
7 |
Thu, Apr 18 2024, 1:10 pm |
|
|
Hat Store in Miami
|
4 |
Thu, Apr 18 2024, 11:50 am |
|
|
Toddler shoe store-not tie shoes
|
2 |
Wed, Apr 17 2024, 2:17 pm |
|
|
Live Salmon At Fish Store. Where Can I Get It? Pref Brooklyn
|
23 |
Wed, Apr 17 2024, 8:49 am |
|
|
Imamother may earn commission when you use our links to make a purchase.
© 2024 Imamother.com - All rights reserved
|  |
 |
|
 |
|
|
