Everyone is buying houses!

amother

Bellflower

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 7:48 pm

amother [ Orange ] wrote:

Here on imamother, people like to brag about how they never ever got a handout for anything ever, but in real life, way more people are getting family help than you think. I'm in my mid 30s, and almost every homeowner in my general age group I know (myself included) got some help from parents/in laws. And this is true in the secular world as well, most of my non Jewish coworkers in my age group also got help to buy. Craziness of the last year and a half aside, it's been increasingly difficult over the last decade to buy a home and many, many people of my generation simply could not have done it without someone helping with the down-payment.

Just because you know people who got help doesn’t mean everyone does. I didn’t and neither did most people I know. And I bought a house at 25

amother

Periwinkle

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 7:49 pm

We bought our house 2.5 years ago, right before Covid hit. We were 26, and borrowed 50k for our down payment (we needed a total of 100k) and planned to give it back over the next year (which we bh pulled off after tightening our belts like crazy). One loan we got for was for 10k from a gemach which allowed us to pay back over 2 years. We both work full time so we didn’t need a co-signer, and are super thankful to the family members that trusted us with their money.

That said, had we not bought our house then, we would’ve not been able to buy a house yet. Our house is now worth nearly double of what we paid, and the mortgage rates are double as well.

I would say we had more mazel than sechel, because we had no idea that Covid is around the corner and the world will go crazy. We just randomly heard about this house and wanted to buy it so we just kind of figured it out by borrowing money.

amother

Dill

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 7:50 pm

amother [ Dill ] wrote:

I bought at 21 with a cosigner a super cheap house in the low 3s. I sold two years later and bought in a new up and coming area for 500k.(without a cosigner bh) My house is now worth about 1.2.
My siblings all made it a priority buy early on. Some did it on their own but most have a cosigner as they were just starting their jobs.
I am now in low 30s.

amother

Starflower

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 7:55 pm

amother [ SandyBrown ] wrote:

My post contained this possibility

Although it is possible it is unlikely that the couple would have sufficient savings at the point for a down payment unless the woman has been working for a number of years - lived at home and saved almost every penny.

But absent unusual circumstances please explain how someone has accumulated $80,000 ore or less to cover down payment, closing costs and other incidental costs of moving without being given the money by parents or inheriting it.

There simply aren't enough years of working at 25 for people to have saved that amount unless the person saved to the exclusion of all other expenses including rent. If they didn't go to college what kind of salary are they earning? If they did go to college to get a degree to earn a higher salary they wouldn't have been in the work force for many years.

I bought at 25, as a kollel couple. I babysat a ton when I was a teenager, worked half a summer for years, and got married with some savings. We lived in a tiny apartment with two rooms+kitchen and put away money until we bought. Granted- that was seven years ago, so my down payment was only $75k. But, my earnings were from a relatively low paying job as well ($30/hr).

amother

NeonBlue

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 7:56 pm

amother [ Iris ] wrote:

Then you and your siblings had help in buying a house! I got married with a few thousand dollars in my savings account and that's it.

Help to buy a house can come in many forms:
Parent/grandparent giving you cash directly
Parent/grandparent putting money aside for you when you were a child
Parent/grandparent allowing you to live rent free in their home or extra apartment

DH and I have none of this available to us. So very unlikely we will ever be able to buy a house. And yes we live simply and save and save and save but it is never going to cut it

I don't think having $1500-2000 in investments from a very young age is the quite the same as my parents forking over a chunk of cash. It grew over time to be a much more significant amount, with very minimal contributions. I did the same for my children- those child tax refunds became their investments. And we aren't touching them. It is their money.

amother

cornflower

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:00 pm

amother [ NeonBlue ] wrote:

It's still help...meaning money the couple didn't earn themselves.

amother

Apple

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:01 pm

amother [ Electricblue ] wrote:

I did buy my first house as a 19 yr old girl, was a small condo I put down only 10% so had to pay PMI but then flipped it several years later for 100% profit and did a 1031 for several more properties and been playing around with the market since. So I got zero support but bh had mazal.
Were not wealthy but bh not struggling.
The market is really tough now but there is no crash coming as many predict. The only time real estate can go down is when the supply exceeds the demand and thats not happening any time soon. So regardless of the interest rates increasing if anyone can buy now they should. One can always do a refi when the rates come down again

Real estate goes down when affordability becomes an issue. With duplexes in Lakewood going for 1 to 1.2 million and the interest rate more than doubling you better believe affordability is an issue. It doesn’t mean that prices are going to crash so it’s 1990 again and you can buy a ranch on a 1 acre lot for 180,000. But it does mean prices are likely to stagnate for a long time or even soften until inflation does it’s job and houses are affordable to the average buyer.

amother

Magenta

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:04 pm

I bought at 25 on my own a starter home many years ago on my own.
I got my BA from maalot in one year as a software engineer at 20. Starting salaries then we’re 45k out of town. But I had very little expenses. Lived at home. Worked full time so didn’t do vacations or had time for expensive activities. Paid my gas and some clothing and going out for pizza with friends. When I got married I had a decent amount saved.
My only regret is I didn’t buy bigger. Life only gets more expensive and complicated and harder to buy - for me at least.

I’m very mindful of saving for my kids future from the day they are each born. IyH I do hope to help them by homes.

amother

NeonBlue

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:05 pm

amother [ cornflower ] wrote:

It's still help...meaning money the couple didn't earn themselves.

It's a relatively easy, lower cost, plan-ahead way to help your children in their future. I don't know why more people don't do this.

And technically (since we are being technical), I did earn some of that money myself doing babysitting/running day camps, etc. The stock market did the rest.

amother

DarkPurple

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:05 pm

Ha, im worse off than all of you together.
40, many children kah, working hard, living simply, renting (costing us a huge penny, + gas and electric). Still can't make ends meet.
Our parents are low income, so no help from anywhere.
Over the years we tried putting away penny by penny, being stingy, no cleaning help.... came a rainy day, when DH lost his job, and there went our saved up pennies!
We are normal dignified people, it's an unfortunate situation not being able to buy a house, like the rest of people our age. It really hurts to see that most people manage to buy, or recieve help, when we really try and it's not happening.

amother

cornflower

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:12 pm

amother [ NeonBlue ] wrote:

Be grateful you can afford to save for your children. And your parents were able to save for you. Many people are struggling to put food on the table, pay for clothing and paying tuition. Saving for their child's future home just may not be a top priority in such a situation.

amother

Apple

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:13 pm

amother [ DarkPurple ] wrote:

Most people would give up their house in a heartbeat to have a close relationship with good kids that give them nachas. Don’t lose sight of the really good and important things in life.

amother

Calendula

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:14 pm

amother [ SandyBrown ] wrote:

Not to be technical but if you were given gifts as a child then you received financial help.

This is also true in terms of money you earned as a child because - at least in imamother - many kids are expected to use their earnings to pay for camp and seminary and even clothing and other incidentals.

If a family pays for those kinds of things the child is effectively receiving a financial benefit that children growing up in less affluent homes wouldn't have.

All of that money was allowed to grow because you weren't asked to use it to pay for stuff.

The bottom line is that home ownership at such a young age is relatively rare unless one has received some kind of financial help from family towards the down payment. Not impossible as there are always examples of how it might be done but it would in general be relatively low percentage at that age.

Exactly! The idea that you could save all the money you earned as a teenager because all your needs and desires were taken care of by your parents!? Not the world I live in.

amother

Calendula

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:19 pm

amother [ Magenta ] wrote:

Then you got help from your parents. When I starting working full time after college, I too lived at home but paid some towards housing and food and ALL my clothing (had already done that for years) and everything else as well. Why should my parents pay for any of my stuff when I am earning a salary of my own? So your "decent amount saved" was due to the fact that your parents were paying for things that you certainly could have paid for on your own.

amother

Magenta

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:37 pm

amother [ Calendula ] wrote:

This is true.
Culturally the community I live in this is standard so I guess I don’t view out of the norm. Parents provide housing and food to children that live at home until marriage or they choose to move out. So while I’m grateful to them I don’t view it the same way you do.
I hope to do the same for my children.

amother

Sienna

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:50 pm

amother [ NeonBlue ] wrote:

How much money did you start out with and how much did it grow to? Where do you invest small numbers? Also stocks can crash and then kaboom you got nothing… Would love to invest a bit for my kids.

amother

Linen

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:52 pm

Maybe it all boils down to Emuna and Davening. Hashem has enough money for all of you out there. Money comes from all different interesting places. Bederech hateva, it doesn't make sense to earn more money. You can win money, get money in all different ways.

We are all in this world to get closer to Hashem. Everyone has different tests down here. For some its money, others are divorces, their parents are divorced, their children aren't well lo aleinu, etc.
If you aren't making ends meet and are ok in an apartment, what is the rush to buy a house? Stop looking at other people! I know its hard!! Who cares that some people are able to buy a house at 26? Obviously, if you can't, that is not what Hashem wants from you now!

I was living in a 1 bathroom 2.5 bedroom apartment with 7 kids. Chasdei Hashem, we bought (borrowed and some help). I know the feeling! Maybe daven for a friend in need and she can daven for you!

Please please focus on your blessings in this world!! It's tough! Keep trying! Hashem is your loving father!

amother

Maize

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 8:55 pm

amother [ Iris ] wrote:

Do you really know people IRL who can buy a house in the CURRENT market at 25 with no help? And if you do, where do they live?

We live in monsey. We’re that age and can bh easily buy a house but we aren’t because I don’t have the heart to buy when the market is so crazy high. Sadly we weren’t in a position to buy a few years back.

amother

Magenta

Thu, Jun 16 2022, 9:27 pm

amother [ Sienna ] wrote:

How much money did you start out with and how much did it grow to? Where do you invest small numbers? Also stocks can crash and then kaboom you got nothing… Would love to invest a bit for my kids.

This is what we do.
Every month we do direct deposit into mutual funds under each of our childrens names.
We do it monthly so that we buy highs and lows and hope that it evens out. This way over 20 yrs we hope to ride the market and get an avg earning. While mutual funds can fluctuate you and invest pretty conservative in a vanguard fund and the money should not disappear entirely no matter how bad the market is.
We have a goal amount and once we reach that we stop putting in. So we don’t have to do for all kids always - assuming it does well
We set this up with a financial advisor that did not charge for his service.
There is a fee taken off every month when investing.