How to determine who gets a free package

Surrendered

Mon, Jul 11 2022, 10:52 pm

Exactly what happyone said.
It is not very bchovedig to call and ask for a gemach package. Usually only people who are really struggling or someone who knows of a family who is struggling, will reach out for help.
It's really degrading and lowers the dignity of the person to be asked for proof of their financial situation.
You're not offering loads of money, it's basic baby necessities which people would purchase if they would be able to.

amother

Crystal

Mon, Jul 11 2022, 11:58 pm

amother [ Navyblue ] wrote:

So ironic I was just saying yesterday that I’d maybe want to open a Gemach for a specific baby item, and hubs was like how would you verify and I x had a good answe…

You can be very confident knowing that if someone takes the guts to call, you can be sure they are not in the wealthy category. They must be struggling financially.

amother

Yarrow

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 1:25 am

amother [ Nemesia ] wrote:

Your attitude is wrong. If you’re not willing to do any research to determine whose more needy and deserving then you will have ppl getting who shouldn’t be getting. That’s on you,

amother [ Nemesia ] wrote:

Yes! If you’re not willing, you shouldn’t be involved in this.

Such an inappropriate (and inaccurate) post. Can't Believe It

Here we have someone who takes the time and effort to offer a much-needed service to the Jewish community and you go and bash her. I'm physically nauseated.

amother

SandyBrown

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 1:43 am

cookiewriter wrote:

Op here. I don’t know. I feel like some people are used to getting everything paid for and for free (from govt and other programs…) they don’t even think twice. They don’t realize I fundraised for every penny.

This. Some people dont realize that others have to fundraise for items, they arent obtaining it through government or big organization grants... I find it especially true at my work. I work at a organization for lower income individuals that is government funded... so many there assume everything is funded, we are all making huge salaries (I wish!!), that we should be "doing more" and "giving them more services" when they dont realize we give more than we are paid to do/reimbursed for by those government funds. My work fundraises to help cover extras. Obviously not everyone there is this way but enough are that it is a "thing".

Also, some gemachs are not only for lower income individuals. At least in my community there are certain people who do things as a chessed for the whole community- such as a bris pillow gemach. This way We all dont have to buy one. She bought a few and loans them out. But everyone uses it no matter their financial ability. But maybe people think it is like that? You made A care package for all new moms? (Guessing it is something single use or for 1 family use- bottles, diapers, burp cloths...). They just assume it is in the "bris pillow" category and not the "Tomchei Shabbos" category?
I would agree with the posters who said to put on the flyer or in the package "to sponsor 1 package for a needy family contact...."

amother

Mint

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 1:53 am

OP I think you have to weigh up the cost to yourself.

Is it worth your 30 minutes per person to get hold of a reference?
Or is the one in 10 people who take without needing more important?

Can you raise that $300 in that time?

I think that people who ask usually need. There are some who will do anything to get things for free but I see that as an emotional need. As long as you are very clear with every caller that this is privately funded and not an entitlement, I would feel sorry for them.

It's a great idea to include a note explaining your service.

A while back, there was a gemach in my neighborhood providing strollers for people who couldn't afford them. I'm not talking Bugaboos and Yoyos. I'm talking the simplest lie down Graco stroller. It was very discreet, very few people knew about it. They would notice in the park people who were carrying a baby or whose stroller looked in really bad shape and quietly send them a new one. Then someone wrote them up in the local advertiser. They closed down in 3 weeks. So many people turned to them. THe person in charge said to me, it was a service for really needy people. Not for people who had used their stroller for 3 kids and were in the mood for a new one. She recently reopened and she asks people to bring their old one as a trade-in and to sign that they do not own another stroller. She feels that if someone would sign a lie like that, it is between them and Hashem. Maybe you could do something like that? Have a paper explaining eligibility and make people sign on it?

amother

Seagreen

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 1:58 am

cookiewriter wrote:

I can totally understand this. I think that before you give it you say that you fundraise for this and its only for people who do not have the means to obtain it themselves. Also maybe you should reach out to community leaders so you can target the real needy indivuals who are usually not that savvy in reaching out for help or are just try to make do with what they have.

amother

Blonde

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 5:34 am

I think you need to be honest with people and letting them know it's coming out of tzedekah money. I mean somehow before they get it they should read a printed sheet explaining the situation and then they can sign it saying that they need it. I feel like if they sign it then they probably need it. I'm sure there's been times where I didn't realize that I just thought it was for everybody. And there were times that I really needed it and people probably had no idea. We bought a home in Israel and our finances have changed but we really did not have any choice because it couldn't be sold right away. I'm sure people saw the home and thought we had plenty of money when really we were barely putting food on the table. But now if I would read something and say only take this if you need it I would definitely choose not to take it. And I am so grateful that there's people to do this when they need it and I'm so grateful that I don't anymore so I really appreciate all the hard work that goes into something like this.

amother

Chambray

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 6:03 am

We used a lot of gemachim when I was a kallah and generally they would ask for a letter from a rav to attest to our status (unsupported, poor, etc). Why don't you ask for a letter rather than having to call? It's not such a big deal to ask, and if these people are benefitting from a reduced price because of your gemach, then it's okay to ask them for a letter.

watergirl

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 6:45 am

cookiewriter wrote:

Would you consider partnering with an existing organization who has a list of vetted recipients? You can provide the items to the organization, labeled with the name of your gmach, and trust them to distribute to those they know are in need, and not just wanting free things?
I think most frum communities have a chesed organization who provides financial assistance, food boxes before Shabbos, etc. and that would be a good place to partner with.

amother

Ballota

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 7:02 am

If giving people without verifying and you have enough for those who truly need it then you don't need to verify but if there's a limited supply, it's best to find out. I don't think that having a letter from a Rabbi works, because anyone can make up a letter from a random Rabbi. I like the idea of recipients signing a form that says they're aware that the money used for this item came from tzedaka, that they don't have this item or can't get it themselves.

amother

Peony

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 7:05 am

cookiewriter wrote:

Btw this is true and I have heard this attitude it’s free bla bla some people have zero embarrassment. Maybe there is a questionnaire you can ask when whoever calls you can answer

thanks

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 9:07 am

I think you owe it to the donors to vet the recipients. You are fundraising for the cause, so you are responsible to make sure the distribution is to needy people. Otherwise, you are the one taking people's money.

My friend has a gemach the gives items to kallahs. She tells the kallahs they need to first apply and qualify for Yad Batya since they do a good job at vetting those that need.

I do know many people that will hear of a free giveaway and call, even for something they don't need and will never use. (Although it sounds like what you're distributing would be used by anyone.) Some people think that everyone but them has loads of money floating around.

Last edited by thanks on Tue, Jul 12 2022, 11:01 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

DarkGray

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 10:17 am

I don't have advise for OP, all I can say is kol hakovaod to her to doing this huge chessed.

On the note of posters here saying if people don't need it they would never have the guts to call to ask for 'free' items? not true at all. I have a friend who is involved with an organization that helps kallahs with households items they can't afford when they are engaged. She tells me you don't even know how many people will just spend lots more money on gowns, shatiels etc because they know they will be using this organization chessed for the basics anyway. (and they say it with pride that they used them...)

amother

Seashell

Tue, Jul 12 2022, 10:30 am

amother [ DarkGray ] wrote:

I know someone who ran a baby gemach and was constantly being asked about bugaboo and similar brands. Those callers refused to take what she had available because it wasn’t the right brand. There are all kinds of people out there.