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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Infants

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Do u expect or want your husband to get up in middle of the night

Yes

40%

[ 61 ]

59%

[ 91 ]

Total Votes : 152

amother

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:35 pm

Would you expect or want your husband to get in the middle of the night with the baby?

amother

Calendula

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:38 pm

No, it’s my job

amother

Electricblue

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:40 pm

amother

Rose

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:40 pm

No, not unless there is some extenuating circumstance. He will get up early with the older kids though.

amother

Floralwhite

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:42 pm

Nope. My husband works crazy hard to earn a good living in order to allow me to stay home. He needs his sleep to function properly at work.
But I also exclusively breastfeed, so there’s no point in him getting up. Baby just wants to nurse.

giftedmom

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:44 pm

amother OP wrote:

Would you expect or want your husband to get in the middle of the night with the baby?

No. Unless it’s a newborn and I was pp.

amother

Ecru

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:44 pm

I’m currently on maternity leave with a newborn. DH is working. I don’t wake him.

Once kids are bigger and we both have to go to work in the morning, DH often does the middle of the night wake ups. He’s a lighter sleeper and will hear someone crying first.

amother

Tomato

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:48 pm

On nights that I’m losing my mind because the baby won’t sleep at all yes. Life is about working with situations not about making rules. Have each others back and work together.

amother

Mocha

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 9:59 pm

Mine helped me, I guess I’m just lucky.

gr82no

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 10:07 pm

Nope unless more than one kid is up. If I need the bathroom and a kid is up the kid is put safely on his bed because he sleeps through it.

Beingreal

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 10:10 pm

No, I love doing it.

BrisketBoss

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 10:13 pm

No, but not really because he works. He does work a lot but he is able to sleep in. It's more that he's hard to wake up and I nurse anyway. If he offered to change and bring me the baby as I hear that his father before him did, I cannot say I would complain.

Ema of 5

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 10:21 pm

amother OP wrote:

Would you expect or want your husband to get in the middle of the night with the baby?

For me it has nothing to do with what I do during the day. I am nursing, so why should my husband wake up? Just to bring me the baby? No thanks, let at least one of us get a good nights sleep.

amother

Steel

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 10:26 pm

Nope.
He got up so early to go to work and came home so late in the evening. He worked so had to enable me to stay home.

amother

Maroon

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 10:46 pm

yes.
I'm a SAHM and DH is a WAHD (Work At Home Dad)
other than carpool on the days we don't have bussing, he's usually sleeping in in the mornings. depends on the day but up to 11am sometimes. His hours are very flexible and his job is compiled of responsibilities and availability (if he gets a phone call before 11 - RARELY - he'll jump out of bed wash hands and pick up the phone) most of his working hours are later in the afternoon or evening due to the nature of his work.
so he'll bring me the baby or rock the baby back to sleep but lately she's been only waking up once most nights (10 mo) so it's not so relevant.

but at the same time he's usually busy on Zoom in his home office or out on meetings in person when suppertime bath and bedtime rolls around....

amother

Yellow

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 10:50 pm

I don't hold he should
(unless I'm working and I wont be able to function)
But.. even if I wanted him to get up in the night he sleeps so deep I wouldn't be able to Wink

amother

Marigold

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 10:51 pm

I'm usually the one.... unless I'm a kimpeturin ( Or pregnant nausea ) and toddler wakes up.
I could always nap during the day if need be.

amother

Ivory

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 10:56 pm

If I’m pp with newborn then id expect him to take some of the night feedings

Now our kids are a little older. I’m still up during the night with the youngest who isn’t sleep trained yet, so DH gets up for our toddler if he ever wakes in middle of the night.

I don’t think SAHM is any less work than having a job. Both are grueling in different ways.

I do work full time from home and keep my kids home too so I’m both sahm/worker I guess. But I’m always telling my DH I’m jealous he gets a break, out of the house at his job. Must be nice

amother

Vermilion

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 10:56 pm

depends. sahm with a baby meant that I couldn't sleep at all during the day unless I had hired help. my babies don't nap on any schedule for any predicable amount of time. I would often ask my husband to be on duty from 8 until 11 pm so I could get a few hours sleep. if our older child woke up he would go to her since I was getting tiny chunks of sleep with a newborn. the first two weeks after my c section I wished he helped me more because I was in a lot of pain at night holding the baby etc. next time I will try to hire a baby nurse if we can afford it because the pain was terrible

amother

Hosta

Wed, Mar 01 2023, 11:04 pm

DH works 14 hours a day and gets around 5 hours of sleep a night. When I have a newborn, DH does bath & bedtime with the little's as soon as he comes home from his long work day. I'd never expect him to wake for the baby at night, though he sometimes does get up.

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