Fasting while nursing an older baby

amother

SandyBrown

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 1:43 pm

amother Valerian wrote:

Yes, for real. Many hold that a women nursing a baby of any age does not have to fast on tisha ba'av.

I just want to point out that many years tisha bav is nidche and the halachas are different.

I know that for me, I was told not to fast at all last year while nursing (if that was my baby's main souce of sustenance) because it's pushed off. But, when it's not nidche he does tell you to fast.

I'm not saying your Rav holds that way, but just want to make people aware that different rules apply, and getting a psak once, isn't a blanket psak for other years.

amother

Aster

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 2:06 pm

Speak to a Rav, I was told your baby doesn’t need to suffer because your fasting. You can nurse like you normally do and if your weak or worried about supply you can drink. Ask a shaila.

amother

Valerian

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 2:07 pm

Hashem_Yaazor wrote:

I don't know "many".

Nursing a 15 month old myself and I'm fasting. He's probably nursed 5 or 6 times already since the fast started at 9 and it's not even 1...

Did you even ask a sheila if you need to fast?

amother

Valerian

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 2:08 pm

amother SandyBrown wrote:

Right. But many hold that pregnant/nursing women don't have to fast even if it's not a nidcha.

amother

NeonPink

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 2:13 pm

I am nursing a 7 month old and was told to fast until I feel like I can’t anymore. So far I’m holding out but only because I’m taking it very very easy and relying on help. If I was up and about, I would feel very faint.
(Although it sounds like your older babies might be waking more at night than mine?? Sounds like a lot to me.)

amother

Vanilla

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 2:14 pm

amother Valerian wrote:

Right. But many hold that pregnant/nursing women don't have to fast even if it's not a nidcha.

Even Tisha bav?! I've never heard that being the klal- only when particularly risky. The 4 minor fasts, definitely, but yk and Tisha bav are only skipped when dangerous

Shoshana Rose

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 2:29 pm

Bh nursing an 18-month-old and fasting, BH is only having her 4th feed since the fast started. (9 pm to sleep, 1:00 AM, 10 AM my kids kept her out of my sight; I didn't tell them to do it, and now 2 PM for nap time.) daily she also nurses 8:30 am and 11AM'ish.

I hope to have an easy fast. my baby almost doesn't eat any solids. today she only ate some bites of WW peanut butter bread, and some bamba snacks. so it's not, easy nursing is her primary nutrition Can't Believe It

amother

Valerian

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 2:31 pm

amother Vanilla wrote:

Even Tisha bav?! I've never heard that being the klal- only when particularly risky. The 4 minor fasts, definitely, but yk and Tisha bav are only skipped when dangerous

Yes, even tisha ba'av, but not yom kippur of course.

amother

SandyBrown

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 2:58 pm

cupcake123 wrote:

Never hurts to ask.
I'm nursing (newborn though so obviously different) and not fasting. But thought for sure would have to fast.

For a newborn, one doesn't fast even if not nursing. I believe the halacha is 30 days.

Hashem_Yaazor

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 3:25 pm

amother Valerian wrote:

Did you even ask a sheila if you need to fast?

This is my tenth ba"h.
No, I didn't ask. I already know the halacha :⁠-⁠)

Last year, which was a nidcheh, was the only time I got a heter with very specific circumstances (3 month old baby was having tongue and lip tie release the next morning and I needed adequate supply) and even then it wasn't a carte blanche no fasting.
I fasted with a 36 day old exclusively nursing baby (not a nidcheh) but didn't with a 2 week old (also not a nidcheh).

Hashem_Yaazor

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 3:27 pm

amother Valerian wrote:

Right. But many hold that pregnant/nursing women don't have to fast even if it's not a nidcha.

Again, define many.
I haven't encountered any rav myself who says this.

I'm not chassidish, so maybe that changes things.

newinbp

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 4:11 pm

Hashem_Yaazor wrote:

Wow! B"h you r amazing!

amother

Razzmatazz

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 4:13 pm

amother SandyBrown wrote:

As to OP, I'm currently nursing my 20 month old who also woke up numerous times in the night, and I definitely feel you!

Same here.

amother

NeonYellow

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 4:35 pm

My baby was born on shiva assar b'tammuz 3 weeks ago, so I got a heter not to fast today, but I am already dreading YK. It doesn't help that my 2.5 year old toddler is a handfull.

amother

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 4:52 pm

amother NeonYellow wrote:

My baby was born on shiva assar b'tammuz 3 weeks ago, so I got a heter not to fast today, but I am already dreading YK. It doesn't help that my 2.5 year old toddler is a handfull.

I was in your exact position last yom kippur, especially the difficult 2.5 yo lol
It was really difficult not gonna lie, try really hard to get a mother's helper or similar. DH also cane home every little bit to make sure I was ok

amother

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 4:54 pm

Shoshana Rose wrote:

Still fasting but really not feeling great, making sure to lie down as much as I can.
My baby is also super picky and doesn't eat much :/
It's so crazy that these big babies are nursing so much!

amother

Aster

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 4:54 pm

Shoshana Rose wrote:

That’s difficult. I nurse my babies until they are 2-3 so I understand a nursing moms life but from a nutritional standpoint your baby needs 3 meals a day plus snacks with the nursing being in addition to that. She needs iron( meat/ chicken) and a variety of fruits and vegetables, grains, dairy and more. The nursing shouldn’t be her sole source of nutrition nothing to do with fasting. Good luck fasting it’s not easy.

amother

Aster

Thu, Jul 27 2023, 4:56 pm

Hashem_Yaazor wrote:

Ask. Always ask. You very possibly will get a heter for shiurim or to drink. If your nursing a baby please ask a Rav.