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Forum
-> Interesting Discussions
Does your husband do bathtime?
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| Yes |
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65% |
[ 154 ] |
| No |
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34% |
[ 82 ] |
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| Total Votes : 236 |
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hodeez
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 Wed, Sep 13 2023, 5:37 am
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Curious to know how many imafathers do bathtime; mine doesn't but I still like him.
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 12
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amf
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 5:38 am
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Other- he knows where it is and will do the occasional bath but it's primarily on me
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34
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Highstrung
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 5:39 am
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Mine does upon request but usually on Fridays. I have zero patience for bathtime. During the week he has too much going on and it’s an additional burden. Don’t blame him, because it’s one of my worst things to do too.
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4
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tweety1
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 5:52 am
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When kids were little dh did bathtime all the time. Sometimes him sometimes me. Now that I have big kids he does on occasion if there's serious sibling חשבונות. He just goes in says it's his turn and argument over.
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2
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Blessing1
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 6:03 am
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My husband bathes the babies. Bh. It's his unwinding after a day of work.
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4
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giftedmom
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 6:06 am
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No, and he still works harder than a gorilla at the zoo
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19
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Einikel
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 6:06 am
He uses Waze to get there. 😂
Yes, he does bathtime often enough.
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7
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watergirl
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 6:09 am
I am so confused at the way some of these men are described on here. This one doesn't know where the bathtub is, that one can't make toast or pasta. These are obviously hyperbolic ways to say just that their husbands don't want to learn to help out in the home they live in, with children they created.
As to the WHY this happened, that's for another thread. It's very sad to me that men are like this and women sit and either encourage it or martyr themselves while it goes on. Even the most busy husband who works all hours of the day and learns every spare second should be willing and able to step in. The fact that this is not happening is problematic.
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22
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NechaMom
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 6:19 am
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No, and he would never ask for directions!
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12
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the world's best mom
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 6:42 am
| watergirl wrote: | I am so confused at the way some of these men are described on here. This one doesn't know where the bathtub is, that one can't make toast or pasta. These are obviously hyperbolic ways to say just that their husbands don't want to learn to help out in the home they live in, with children they created.
As to the WHY this happened, that's for another thread. It's very sad to me that men are like this and women sit and either encourage it or martyr themselves while it goes on. Even the most busy husband who works all hours of the day and learns every spare second should be willing and able to step in. The fact that this is not happening is problematic. | My dh hardly helps in the house and I think that's the way it needs to be for us. I am a SAHM and he works 12 hour shifts and has over an hour of travelling each way, plus Shacharis before and Maariv after. He leaves the house 6 am and gets home around 10 pm. How can he help if he's not there?
He is home Fridays, though and he loves to cook. One thing he helps with a lot is the cooking for Shabbos BH.
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19
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TravelHearter
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 6:48 am
If it works why does it make a difference? Seriously. Every marriage is different, eve DH couple figures out household responsibilities together. What one couple does should not effect another couple.
If it isn’t working, bring it up and communicate. But otherwise these comments don’t help anyone and only cause resentment.
BH DH is home for bedtime with littles and we divide and conquer. But besides for that it’s on me, but it’s fine and works for us! He would never make dinner he hates it. I don’t enjoy it either but practically it makes sense for me to do it. One of my friends mentioned her husband cooks dinner and while that sounds nice I’m not at all jealous, BH it works for us.
Same with general ‘running’ of the house. Everyone divided things differently.
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13
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watergirl
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 6:51 am
| the world's best mom wrote: | My dh hardly helps in the house and I think that's the way it needs to be for us. I am a SAHM and he works 12 hour shifts and has over an hour of travelling each way, plus Shacharis before and Maariv after. He leaves the house 6 am and gets home around 10 pm. How can he help if he's not there?
He is home Fridays, though and he loves to cook. One thing he helps with a lot is the cooking for Shabbos BH. |
You missed the point of what I was saying, and I specifically addressed the husband who works super full time.
If this set up works for you, which it clearly does, that is fantastic!! I mean it! And the fact that you said your husband can cook and does a lot of the shabbos prep further shows you did not really read my post. I said I was talking about the men and wives who claim they/their husbands can not toast break or boil water for pasta or know where the bathtub is.
If you needed him to help you, he could. You said that. I meant in a situation where you truly needed him, like after a baby, if you were sick, etc. If there was chas v'shalom a situation where you needed him to do something like cook or bathe a child, HE COULD and HE WOULD.
I thought I was being clear but apparently I was not. I an not referring to husbands like yours, who knows how to step up if he needs to.
I'm referring to the men with wives who come on here and tout "oh my husband is so useless in an emergency, he can't even make an egg". That's not your husband.
And then I said, something should have been done to teach these guys how to bathe children, how to make chicken and potatos, etc.
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11
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1ofbillions
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 6:53 am
What horrifies me more than men not ever bathing their kids is men not ever changing diapers. Who in the world do they think they are? Why are they above changing their child’s diaper when the child wouldn’t exist without them and the diaper needs to be changed so many times each day for several years?
It’s arrogant, childish and immature. Plus so disrespectful to their wives. Who raises these poor excuses for men?
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19
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Pink Flamingo
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 6:56 am
My dh does baths every single night.
After dinner I am usually too drained to deal with the kids anymore after spending a whole afternoon with them. I prefer to work in the quiet kitchen cleaning up from dinner. And dh is happy to spend time with the kids after not seeing them a whole day.
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happy chick
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 6:57 am
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if I drew a full diagram of the house and hi-lited the bathtub in RED, im sure he could find it. if he wanted to.
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6
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DreamerForever
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 7:08 am
My husband, who is a very capable guy in all other areas, has this thing that there are three domestic duties that he-- I quote: 'doesn't know how to do'.
They are:
1. Washing dishes
2. Wiping down countertops
3. Washing a kid's hair in the bath
It's become kind of a joke, that he'll say, ''It's not even fair to ask me, it's something I just don't know how to do!''
He seldom does these (uber difficult) duties, but to be fair, will 100% be up to the task if it really needs doing, when I'm post partum or sick. Or if I beg hard enough.
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0
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iluvy
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 7:19 am
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My husband does baths. I clean the kitchen after supper while he does it. These days I have a nursing baby so he does baths and cleans the kitchen while I nurse. I'm not saying this to cause resentment but to raise the rock bottom imamother husband expectations. What woman in the world ever says "I worked hard all day so I need to sit on the couch and unwind, so the kids won't get bathed or fed" And what in the world do genitals have to do with washing dishes or putting kids to bed?
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4
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BH Yom Yom
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 7:23 am
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BH my DH does bathtime more than I do!
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1
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daredevil
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 7:26 am
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He offers to but I would prefer to
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2
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animeme
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Wed, Sep 13 2023, 7:28 am
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He's not home. And because of that, when he is home, he's not really familiar or comfortable. So he'll sit in the bathroom and watch them and talk to them if he's home and hasn't just walked in, but when it comes to the bathing and the in and out, it's me.
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