Help an ADHD mom, how often do you clean the following?

amother

Mon, Oct 23 2023, 2:10 pm

Thank you everyone!!

I don't have cleaning help, would be a big stress on my budget and it stresses me out how much I would have to do to get ready for the cleaning lady!

I just cleaned my stove yesterday and was embarrassed for myself at how much buildup it had. I basically clean when I notice that something is really really disgusting or I'm having someone over..

I really really want to get things under control, just so much more pleasant to be in a clean space and to teach my kids what normal is, don't want them to grow up in dysfunction.

Amother Mistyrose, thank you that sounds like something I can aim toward.

And thanks for the steam mop idea too I'm going to look into those.

stardream

Mon, Oct 23 2023, 2:22 pm

mha3484 wrote:

DH does a lot of the cleaning. Two things that really make it easier is 1) having a stick vacuum that you can just grab anytime anyone spills. I have a dyson but you can get anything. My kids joke that its like DHs second hand lol. But its so easy to use when someone makes a mess one of us just grabs it and cleans up. My kids can use it too.

2) I have an electric mop. It makes mopping up spills a billion times easier. No dirty water, no wringing it out are big deals. I had a steam mop but then your left with a lot of water and I was always using towels and it was just annoying. I liked the robo mop but it didnt do corners. Eventually we settled on this. But the floors stay cleaner overall because its so easy to wipe up spills nothing really accumulates like it used to.

I find a a few investments in good cleaning tools you will actually use make a big difference.

Can you post your electric mop?

amother

Vanilla

Mon, Oct 23 2023, 2:42 pm

amother OP wrote:

*Kitchen floor
*Floor in rest of home
*Stove
*Fridge
*Counters
*Bathroom

What is the absolute minimum you would consider functional?

Thank you! Have a few toddlers for reference in terms of mess level created

Probably shouldn't admit the last time I cleaned my bathroom Hiding

Keep in mind, I have daily help, but these are my standards so I’d do it myself if I didn’t:
Kitchen floor- daily
Rest of floors- every other/3rd day
Stove- daily
Fridge- once a week
Counters- daily
Bathrooms- daily/every other day

amother

SandyBrown

Mon, Oct 23 2023, 2:46 pm

amother OP wrote:

cl stands for cleaning lady
*Kitchen floor
Cl 2x a week. In between if needed I spot clean w Mr. Clean spray and rag.

*Floor in rest of home
cl Btwn 2x a week and once in 2 weeks depends on the season, whatever is going in at the time.

*Stove
cl 2x a week

*Fridge
cl depends. Yom tov time or with a toddler it's more frequently maybe weekly or bi weekly. Otherwise once in a blue moon. Spills get cleaned as soon as I notice them. I give a swipe with my hand underneath every item before it goes into the fridge. Same w items before they go into the cabinet. If u feel something I clean it/wipe it down before putting it back. So fridge says clean for a long time. I peek in and take inventory of what's in my fridge minimum once a week.

*Counters
After cooking/baking/serving.
And then cl 2x a week but then she does the entire kitchen.

*Bathroom
1 bathroom, if it gets used, then the cl 2x a week but someone's it's not used for a long time so I'll tell the cl to clean it once every 2 weeks just to keep it fresh.
Main bathroom, full clean 2x a week other days I'll wipe the toilet seat and bowl and flusher and the floor right in front if toolet down every day.

Me and dh veey likely have ADHD too. Qw have 2 kids with adhd (one medicated one likely will start soon). We have boys and girls of different ages. They leave stuff and messes ALL OVER THE PLACE. Although I stuggle with many adhd traits, I'm fairly disciplined (most if the time) to clean after myself. My dh and kids DON'T. And it's driving me bonkers. The cl can be here Monday morning (she just left. Bless her!) And Monday night the house looks like a tornado hit!
I once got vert frustrated and I told my 10 yo w adhd. "Please clean away after yourself. Its not right to leave messes everywhere" she tells me that I also leave messes sometimes. I really bit my lip not to tell her she leaves messes everywhere she BREATHES. And not just SOMETIME but everything. All the time!
Anyway I just told her "maybe. But after all I end up cleaning away the mess I leave. Who ends up cleaning away the mess YOU leave?"
That one time she attempted to clean away.
I know it's a real struggle for her so I tend to ignore and deal with it. It really put a strain on our relationship and it just wasn't worth it! Bh in school she's slowly learning and it's spilling over to the home life. There there are no excuses.....

I do not know what I would do without my cleaning help! She's the key to my sanity.

amother

Firebrick

Mon, Oct 23 2023, 3:38 pm

Another mother with ADHD here. My kids go from teens down to toddlers.

Lost my cleaning lady less than a year ago, and decided that since I wasn't pregnant or postpartum at the time, I'd see whether I could keep the house clean myself. So here's my "minimums" right now:

*Kitchen floor: Once a week, before Shabbos. It really needs it 2-3 times a week, but that's not happening. If it's swept once a day, that's incredible. And honestly, that's usually dh or a teen who cares and notices more than I do.
*Floor in rest of home: Once a week. Usually Wednesday so it doesn't interfere with Shabbos prep.
*Stove: Almost never. Sigh. Drives dh batty. The only time I notice is when I'm about to cook something, in which case I don't have time to clean it. Or when I've just cooked something and it's hot. And we all know what happens if you say "I'll do it in a few minutes, when it cools down..." So it's really gross by the time I realize it.
*Fridge: Almost never. Yes, my fridge is gross. Maybe twice a year, once being before Pesach? It's really hard to clean for Pesach. I do wipe down a fruit drawer or a shelf every once in a while when it's empty and I notice and have a minute. But we all know how often that happens...
*Counters: Kitchen counters -- the part I'm cooking on gets wiped down after I finish cooking the thing and am cleaning up anyway. But the back parts, or the area behind the sink? I try for once a week before Shabbos. "Try" being the operative word.
*Bathroom: Around once a week. I keep Clorox wipes in the bathroom. Kids toilet and counter and sink get cleaned when the toddlers are in the tub. My whole bathroom gets quickly cleaned when I'm about to go into the shower anyway. The third bathroom? When I think of it. Which isn't often at all, seeing as how I have teenagers using it...Oh, and the kids' tub? That also gets overlooked often. Can't clean it when they're in it, right?

Never mind, don't listen to anything I'm saying. It's all true, though.

amother

Valerian

Mon, Oct 23 2023, 3:44 pm

I don't have cleaning help anymore. So now, everything gets done once a week for Shabbos. The floor is swept as needed throughout the week, but mopping only once. Sometimes I'll grab a wet paper towel and spray something on a sticky spot. Bathrooms only once, stovetop once, etc. I don't have little kids anymore so its much different in that there are no sticky toddler hands everywhere. That makes a huge difference in how dirty things get. But for me, at my stage I'd rather save the money and I think its fine as long as it gets done once a week.

amother

Lilac

Mon, Oct 23 2023, 3:58 pm

amother Darkblue wrote:

As a fellow adhd mom with little ones, investing in a good robot vacuum/mop combo was the best thing I've done. It gives me an incentive to clear the floor and it cleans twice a day or more if needed. It's such an amazing feeling to wake up to a sparkling house. Now if only there was a robot for counters Wink

I totally get it about the counters... B"h my cleaner does it once a week otherwise it's spot cleaning when it's really dirty. Yes it's dirty, and I treat it as such. I don't put any food or utensils down directly (only if will be washed or peeled, or in a plate/bag/container). Yeah....
I probably should be evaluated... You think I qualify for adhd diagnosis? Can't Believe It

amother

Mistyrose

Mon, Oct 23 2023, 4:37 pm

amother OP wrote:

For all the people that said they only clean when they see dirt or dust...
It's much easier (I'm not adhd but I have a few children that are!!)to have a cleaning schedule than wait until you see the dirt.

#1 a lot of ppl especially adhd ones don't notice when it needs cleaning !
#2 it's hard to find time to clean but if it becomes a habit it's much easier!
Make yourself a weekly schedule(preferably on a computer so it's clear and legible by ALL family members) and stick to it, no matter what!!!

Think about what other commitments (appointment, therapy,carpool...) you have on each day when scheduling cleaning jobs!

For all daily jobs: Make a 15 minutes family clean up time before putting littles ones in bed! ( put away toys, clear supper table, fill up dishwashers, pick up shoes, briefcases and coats)
Kol hakavod OP for dealing with the situation rather than ignoring it! Hatzlacha

amother

Lilac

Mon, Oct 23 2023, 4:52 pm

amother Mistyrose wrote:

15 minutes between supper and bedtime??
Curious, does anyone on here with adhd have that time? In my house, once the kids have (finally!) finished eating it's pj's and bed.

amother

Turquoise

Mon, Oct 23 2023, 8:21 pm

amother Firebrick wrote:

I don’t have teens only little kids but everything else about your post is the same for me including the no more cleaning lady.

I find it so so hard to get myself to clean. Once I start cleaning it’s so hard to stay on task so it takes me SO SO long. Which is part of the reason why I just never start…. I’d just rather turn off the kitchen light and go read a book. But then the next day I wake up and I’m like “ew”. 😔

amother

Turquoise

Mon, Oct 23 2023, 8:26 pm

amother Lilac wrote:

15 minutes between supper and bedtime??
Curious, does anyone on here with adhd have that time? In my house, once the kids have (finally!) finished eating it's pj's and bed.

We do. I have totally rearranged out nighttime schedule so we actually have some down time (books or play) before the kids get into bed. It is so so awesome. And part of the schedule is they stop playing 10 minutes before bedtime to clean up their toys while I usually put away dishes/dinner clean up.

And I have ADD for sure lol.I think this just happens to be one of the few areas of my day/life that I have figured out a system for and kept to it….

amother

Maroon

Tue, Oct 24 2023, 12:13 pm

amother Vanilla wrote:

ADHD here… if I was able to keep my house clean just by having standards, my house would be spotless.

OP, did you ever read “how to keep house while drowning” by KC Davis? It’s a great cleaning guide/support for those of us struggling with ADHD. You might want to refer to that as a starting point, before you create a list of minimums.