What does it mean if my house is listed under a trust fund?

vintagebknyc

Sun, Nov 12 2023, 8:23 pm

amother OP wrote:

Thank you
This is a very sensitive subject and he gets very upset when I bring it up.
It’s as if I’m waiting for him to die and take whatever I can. This is far from the truth but whenever I bring this topic up he becomes very upset and tells me that he left me everything in his will.
I did see the will for a few seconds when he put it in front of me and told me to sign it. I didn’t understand a lot because of the legal language. It did mention most of what I wrote above but it did include his other children (all married) which I do understand. He claims he had to do things this way because he doesn’t think I would be generous with his other kids. He might be right- who knows??
When my father died I didn’t get anything. My mother did. She was able to buy things generously for her kids and grandchildren with the life insurance money. I wonder if I would specifically give his other children anything as they are married and most are well to do of their own accord. We are not wealthy but not poor either…
No, I’m not planning for his death Chas vshalom… just trying to figure things out now.
And we have our own kids together so obviously that’s something important to plan for. He does have life insurance but even though his life insurance says I should get x amount, he also designated x amount for his other kids. Not sure if this is the norm in a situation like this. His house and life insurance he wants to split between me and our kids and also his other kids.
Will I resent him for this if he goes first?

Why would you need to sign his will? My beneficiaries didn't have to sign my will

amother

Dandelion

Sun, Nov 12 2023, 9:09 pm

amother Lightcoral wrote:

Trusts are used to protect assets from going to the government instead of the family.

The fact that you are a blended family is complicated. He wants to do what he feels he wants to do. Probably he feels you won't like it that much if he isn't willing to share the details with you. Or he is easily freaked out by the topic, did the responsible paperwork but doesn't like talking about it.

How about just trusting him? Is it a bad relationship?

Also people might not carry life insurance if their assets are above a certain amount.

When people are to be trusted they are up front. Im assuming hes not trying to mess you over, but if hes that uptight things are probably happening that yoire not gonna be happy with.

To hear what another family did:

I come frim a blended family where each side lost a parent.

My father and step mother valued each sides assets at the time of their marriage and "held" the value of assets in a trust for each side. They actually gave that to each kid when we married and told us it was our yerusha (gulp). They were very clear that they wrre "buying us out" of our share of the assets so we couldnt complain.
They werent super wealthy so it was nice but not crazy. It helped buy our houses (yes, the other side afforded much nicer houses) snd start businesses. They probably would not have been as generous at that stage of life if it wasn't for this situation.

Anything theyve earned since then my understanding will go to the surviving spouse then be split among all the kids regular Honestly, I dont know though. Im from the oldest and financially independent, but the youngrst of the kids (sibs, step, half) are not yet, so im assuming things are set aside to get them on their feet if something chas vshalom untimely happens. Also the "ours" didnt get a "buyout" so im assuming something is extra for them so theyre on relatively equal footing to the rest if my parents arent able to give it to them at marriage .

amother

NeonGreen

Sun, Nov 12 2023, 9:14 pm

amother OP wrote:

I might have signed as a witness

You can't sign as a witness if you are a beneficiary.

I don't know what your situation is but the secrecy makes me suspect as well as his annoyance if you ask questions a spouse in a functional relationship would. Actually a spouse in a functional relationship wouldn't have to ask questions because these kinds of critical financial decisions involving the estate and ownership of the house would have been mutually discussed and agreed upon.

That said, no one on the internet can advise you on the meaning of this except an attorney who has reviewed the documents. You should speak to a Trusts and Estates attorney as that is their specialty - even if spouse isn't involved - for your own sake.

There are several kinds of trusts. Most married people have what is called a Living Trust which enables the estate to avoid the delays and expense of probate. But typically that kind of Trust names the surviving spouse as the sole beneficiary with the other beneficiaries getting their share when both spouses are dead. A benefit is that a trusted child is often the Co-Trust (especially after one spouse dies) and therefore that Trustee can immediately use assets of the estate to pay funeral costs and other ongoing expenses.

The thing about setting up a Trust so that in the event you are in a nursing home means that the assets are completely out of your control. Not to mention that anyone who actually has assets would want to use those assets and not be put in a nursing home but use those assets for care at home. I don't know any affluent people who go to nursing homes - they all stay at home comfortably because they can afford 24/7 people at home.

amother

Bronze

Sun, Nov 12 2023, 9:19 pm

amother OP wrote:

This makes sense. Although we have been married for a long time and have children together, he has children from a previous marriage too. He probably wants to make sure that they will benefit from the sale of the house when I sell it.
I think he told me that he wrote in his will that I should stay in the house after he dies but after I move the profits from the sale include his other kids.
Please tell me if there’s anything I need to worry about.
BH he is well now. I just always worry because the house is only in his name even though I’ve been living here for many, many years. (He purchased the house before we were married)

My family member has this arrangement and can’t move (to be closer to her children, and downsize, to be on a ground floor) because if she sells the house the profits go to her step kids. It’s pretty terrible so I would gently clarify.

amother

Sun, Nov 12 2023, 9:44 pm

amother Bronze wrote:

Why can’t she move? Let’s say her house is worth $800,000 and she moves to a smaller home that would cost $400,000. The sale from the original home would cover the cost of the new home. Is she simply against her step children getting the money? Or is this a completely different situation?
I would move eventually but I know in advance that I will not be living off the sale of the house although it would help me be able to buy something smaller.

amother

Steelblue

Sun, Nov 12 2023, 10:20 pm

amother OP wrote:

I'm not amother Bronze but it sounds like the trust only allows her relative to live in the house, this is called a life estate. And that the step-children are the future beneficiaries of the trust principle, which means the sale proceeds, if her relative moves, go to them.

amother

Smokey

Sun, Nov 12 2023, 10:21 pm

amother Lightcoral wrote:

If he had you sign the trust papers then you are a designated person to manage the trust after 120. Only those people sign that.

Are you sure he isn't just squeamish on the topic? And can't handle talking about it? Lots of people are like that.

Not necessarily. She has no idea what she signed. Op I think you should look into this you don't need any surprises later. Something definitely sounds strange. I am in charge of my Dad's trust and I was made very well aware what I was signing for. They don't keep the managers of the trust out of the loop.

Also, her dh obviously isn't squeamish about the topic being that he has all the papers in order. Sounds like he just doesn't want her to know what they say.

amother

Narcissus

Sun, Nov 12 2023, 10:25 pm

To me it seems OP would have gotten the house if it was left on her dh's name because she's the spouse. As soon as he changed it to a trust and I'm thinking that's likely what she signed for- that she agrees he change it to a trust, she lost the house.

I don't know much about trusts so not sure what happens now when it's on a trust but she definitely lost her automatic rights to the house after his death, may he live till 120.

amother

Smokey

Sun, Nov 12 2023, 10:27 pm

amother Narcissus wrote:

Exactly especially if she isn't one of the beneficiaries of the trust. Because technically if the house is in a trust her dh doesn't own it so why would she get it when he dies unless it's stated that she does?

amother

Sun, Nov 12 2023, 10:32 pm

ellacoe wrote:

Besides seeing the will, it is important to know what the terms of the trust are, who the trustees and beneficiaries are as well.

I think I do know who the trustee is. It’s a relative. He must have done it this way to make sure his other children would be beneficiaries of the house.
I think that what must have changed was that since his name was the only one listed on deed, the probate law would have entitled me to the house after his death (I think). Now he set it up with terms for me to be able to stay, move to another house if I want and whatever is left goes to his other children.
I guess if I move then I leave that house to our children.
I wonder what happens if I want to move and there are no profits from the sale? Would I still be able to move? It’s probably assumed that moving means downsizing and would cost less but what if I would move to an expensive property in an expensive neighborhood?
I’m not dealing with this situation now so it probably doesn’t really matter…

amother

Steelblue

Sun, Nov 12 2023, 10:32 pm

Agree, not knowing what she signed is concerning.

OP, did you think that the attorney was representing both of you? Or was it made very clear to you that the lawyer was representing only your dh? You should have been given time to carefully review whatever you were putting your signature on.

I'm afraid that the secrecy, and unwillingness to allow you to read what you were signing, might indicate a postnup or a waiver of the spousal elective share. Of course this may not be the case at all but until you review the documents it's all just speculation.