What grade is normal for a sleepover?

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children

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View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 9:13 pm

My second grade dd is asking for one

amother

Wandflower

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 9:19 pm

amother OP wrote:

My second grade dd is asking for one

I slept by a friend for shabbos when I was in second.

amother

Lime

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 9:20 pm

amother Wandflower wrote:

I slept by a friend for shabbos when I was in second.

Same, started in 2nd grade.

amother

Forsythia

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 9:24 pm

None. There sleepovers aren't safe. If you don't know why, please read up on it. And that's coming from me, a very chilled mom. But I will never be chill about my child's safety. Besides, I'd never let a kid that young go for a sleepover. The minimum age my mom had was 10 years old.

amother

Brickred

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 9:30 pm

My daughter and her closest friends did it for Their 8th birthday. I wasn’t sure about it but was persuaded to go with it so I did

amother

Yarrow

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 9:32 pm

I don't allow sleep over's for no reason. If I need to be away, my kids only stay at someone we know well & doesn't have older boys at home.

amother

Hosta

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 9:35 pm

I let my daughter in 4th grade but I am picky where she goes. She went to someone once who gave her melatonin without permission. I was very very upset. I was in touch with the parents the whole time and they never told me. My daughter told me they gave her sleeping pills .... She had never had one before.

More shocking to me was that both parents are in the medical field and thought nothing of it.

I let her go after she begged me for months.

Bh she has gone other places since then but I am super careful....my other kids aren't interested.

amother

Wine

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 9:37 pm

My daughter started doing some shabbos sleep-overs with school friends about 4th grade, as best I recall. I was alarmed when she would relay to me things that were done in other people's homes that were surprising. It was things I didn't need to know (about 2-3 different families of friends). I had assumed that these families had a level of observance that I understood all frum families to have (and also we had enrolled at the same school). That was not the case.

amother

Hyacinth

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 9:40 pm

amother Hosta wrote:

Melatonin is not "sleeping pills "

amother

Yarrow

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 9:41 pm

amother Hyacinth wrote:

Melatonin is not "sleeping pills "

She didn't say it is. It's just the expression her young kid used when telling her parents that she was given something to make her sleepy. In her mind, it's a sleeping pill. She never saw melatonin before.

amother

Hyacinth

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 9:55 pm

amother Yarrow wrote:

And....? I still don't get the shock and horror

amother

Yarrow

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 10:00 pm

amother Hyacinth wrote:

And....? I still don't get the shock and horror

No one has right to give any supplements to others kids, if they didn't approve it with the parents beforehand.
I'd be very upset as well.

amother

Hosta

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 10:02 pm

amother Hyacinth wrote:

And....? I still don't get the shock and horror

I think it's something they should've told me. I would never ever give someone else's kid melatonin or anything without clearing it with the parents. It's basics.

Tzutzie

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 10:02 pm

amother Hosta wrote:

Are you me?
I had a similar experience. But it was my SISTERS house.
My kid had a weird reaction and acted kookoo for 3 days she couldn't sleep but was woozy. She was only 3....
I have given my kid melatonin occasionally since. But she had never had it at that age. And I give less than 1/2 a mg. She gave her kids 4 mg. And so game mine too. She just overdosed her basically.

Back to the op, I do not allow sleepovers for no reason.
I have kids in my house often, and when I go away I'm careful where I send to. Both my dds and ds.
Bh so far never had any issues. But dont allow it just for fun. My kids hate me for it. But they already know the rule. I do let kids have sleepovers in my house for fun though.

amother

Hosta

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 10:05 pm

Tzutzie wrote:

Are you me?
I had a similar experience. But it was my SISTERS house.
My kid had a weird reaction and acted kookoo for 3 days she couldn't sleep but was woozy. She was only 5....

Back to the op, I do not allow sleepovers for no reason.
I have kids in my house often, and when I go away I'm careful where I send to. Both my dds and ds.
Bh so far never had any issues. But dont allow it just for fun. My kids hate me for it. But they already know the rule. I do let kids have sleepovers in my house for fun though.

Lol not you!

Bh my daughter didn't have any reaction and was ttly fine but especially being in the medical field they should've asked me....what if my kids was allergic or had reactions to it? It's not ok to give to someone else's kids ever without parental permission.

mha3484

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 10:08 pm

I had my first sleepover at 10 and I think I would do the same for my girls.

Tzutzie

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 10:10 pm

amother Hosta wrote:

So I just realized it happened when we were still in the old house. she turned 4 right before we moved. So she was 3! Not 5!
I think it was crazy. But I agree. My kid DID have a weird reaction. (Probably becuase of the high dose!)
I have given kids melatonin in my house. But only with moms consent. I've learned to ask "if kid has trouble falling asleep and is awake past 10,11,12 (depending on age) can I offer the kid a melowchew? If yes, how much?
I've almost always gotten a yes. One time I remember a mother told me her kid wakes with nightmares after Melo. (one of my kids does too!)

ftm1234

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 11:50 pm

I would not allow sleepovers at any age.

If anybody wants, they can have friends come sleep over at our house, in a room where the door has no lock.

amother

Anemone

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 11:52 pm

amother Forsythia wrote:

That seems pretty paranoid. No sleepovers ever? At any age? In any home? Wow.

ftm1234

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 11:56 pm

amother Anemone wrote:

That seems pretty paranoid. No sleepovers ever? At any age? In any home? Wow.

I don't think you'd think sleepovers are safe if you heard about all the horrible things that can happen.

I've heard of molestat!on, r@pe and even girls touching each other.

No, sleepovers are NOT safe!

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