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Forum
-> Household Management
-> Finances
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amother
OP
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 Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:25 pm
I just want to share and would love to hear if there are any helpful tips...
My husband and I saved extremely after the wedding and invested everything in real estate. BH, we managed to reach a nice portfolio with a net worth of several millions and a nice monthly profit.
We BH have 4 children and live in our own apartment with a low mortgage on it.
We earn a total of around 20K a month and really try to live only from 10K a month and invest the rest back in real estate.
The problem is that I see a lot of people around me who live in rentals and earn much less than me but still go on more vacations than us, wear brand names, go to expensive restaurants and of course go to Florida for Pesach, and this makes me really confused about how to live and how much to save for the future
(We also go on vacations and restaurants, etc. but not in the same amount)
It just drives us crazy. all day we are busy thinking about how much we should spend and from how much we should live.
I wonder what others think.
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amother
Mimosa
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:27 pm
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So this is what a rich person problem looks like 🤣
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theoneandonly
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:28 pm
Obviously they are not saving nearly as much as you are.
I commend you for saving at much and being so money conscious. But on the other hand, what's the point of having so much money if you never enjoy it? You can allow yourself to breathe a little.
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amother
Winterberry
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:28 pm
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Stop looking and comparing yourself to others! Who cares what they do.
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amother
Catmint
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:29 pm
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My guess is they're not paying full tuition. With 4 kids, I'm assuming you're paying around 4k in tution, which leaves you a less extreme 6k to actually live on.
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theoneandonly
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:31 pm
| amother Mimosa wrote: | | So this is what a rich person problem looks like 🤣 |
Not nice. She very clearly wrote in her title that she has millions. If that triggers you, no need to open her thread and post on it.
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giftedmom
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:33 pm
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There’s a balance. Saving to an extreme and obsessing about it is also not healthy. Enjoy the money you work for it’s not just for your kids to inherit.
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erm
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:33 pm
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Living on 10k a month is really not a lot when paying for a Jewish lifestyle.
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amother
Foxglove
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:34 pm
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Why does it drive you crazy? Save and spend what you think is reasonable. A lot of people who are living different than you may not be saving as much.
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BaltoMom65
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:35 pm
Deleted. Just be thankful
Last edited by BaltoMom65 on Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:37 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother
OP
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:36 pm
| theoneandonly wrote: | Obviously they are not saving nearly as much as you are.
I commend you for saving at much and being so money conscious. But on the other hand, what's the point of having so much money if you never enjoy it? You can allow yourself to breathe a little. |
My problem is that I don't understand how other ppl. don't think about money as much as me, we are thinking ahead and are nervous about marrying our kids off, and giving them a future and about my pension.
I guess my question is how could you live the present without freaking out about the future.
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amother
Mauve
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:36 pm
Firstly its none of your business.
Secondly, how do you know that they didn't also invest in real estate and have plenty of money. I actually know a few people who are worth well into the millions who live in apartments and chose to rent for now.
You also have no idea if they're using points for vacations, parents pay for it, etc
Someone going to Florida for Pesach could very well be going with family and it doesn't have to cost a ton. I was going to go this there, all it was going to cost me was tickets. I was going to go with family.
Also how do you know how much they do things? Your whole post seems very off honestly.
Also, as others pointed out living on 10,000 a month is very very low for a family of kids. Just my tuition alone, is about $5,000 monthly. You must be living super frugally or have very low tuition. You must also have a very low mortgage. Otherwise your numbers are making no sense.
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amother
Scarlet
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:36 pm
This thread is rather strange.
What is it to you how other people live???
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amother
Sapphire
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:37 pm
Op we live on 10k a month with 4 kids, and it is not a lot or luxurious. (Also, we are avid miles collectors, so we do travel a lot but we don’t pay for flights or hotels.)
I think you should spend another 3k a month and you’ll feel a real difference, as that would go towards all the extras the people around you are enjoying.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:38 pm
| giftedmom wrote: | | There’s a balance. Saving to an extreme and obsessing about it is also not healthy. Enjoy the money you work for it’s not just for your kids to inherit. |
This is exactly my question, what is extreme and what is normal. After all, there is no limit to how much money a person can spend....
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amother
Foxglove
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:39 pm
| amother OP wrote: | My problem is that I don't understand how other ppl. don't think about money as much as me, we are thinking ahead and are nervous about marrying our kids off, and giving them a future and about my pension.
I guess my question is how could you live the present without freaking out about the future. |
Some people are more carefree and less anxious than others. Do what works for you and stop looking at what other people do.
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giftedmom
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:44 pm
| amother OP wrote: | My problem is that I don't understand how other ppl. don't think about money as much as me, we are thinking ahead and are nervous about marrying our kids off, and giving them a future and about my pension.
I guess my question is how could you live the present without freaking out about the future. |
If you’re never living the present and always freaking out about the future then what kind of life are you living?
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amother
OP
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:44 pm
| amother Mauve wrote: | Firstly its none of your business.
Secondly, how do you know that they didn't also invest in real estate and have plenty of money. I actually know a few people who are worth well into the millions who live in apartments and chose to rent for now.
You also have no idea if they're using points for vacations, parents pay for it, etc
Someone going to Florida for Pesach could very well be going with family and it doesn't have to cost a ton. I was going to go this there, all it was going to cost me was tickets. I was going to go with family.
Also how do you know how much they do things? Your whole post seems very off honestly.
Also, as others pointed out living on 10,000 a month is very very low for a family of kids. Just my tuition alone, is about $5,000 monthly. You must be living super frugally or have very low tuition. You must also have a very low mortgage. Otherwise your numbers are making no sense. |
I'm talking about a few families that I know well. They don't own a single property and live only on their paycheck but will spend it fully and even more. I know because they share with us a lot of their finance.
On your other point, my tuition is 3K, one kid is still home with me.
My mortgage is 1K a month (We are renting our basement and it cover the rest of it)
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giftedmom
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:46 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | This is exactly my question, what is extreme and what is normal. After all, there is no limit to how much money a person can spend.... |
Personally I spend within reason for quality of life. Not for the sake of having or doing expensive things or to give off some kind of impression. But to actually enjoy my life more.
Your anxiety is what seems extreme here and is something you should explore.
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synthy
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Wed, Apr 10 2024, 9:48 pm
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If I understand correctly, it’s not that you can’t spend more, you just don’t want to. Which is fine, but then it’s weird to compare with how much others are spending.
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