Scared to be ok with my larger body but….

amother

Sat, May 04 2024, 9:15 pm

I have pcos, I’m also on necessary psych meds that are linked to weight gain. The first one I’ve put on a good 10 plus pounds (I have a petite frame) that stayed on no matter what, even with ozempic. I changed insurances and so I had to wait almost 2 months to see a doctor and been off the shot. I also had to go on a new medication that increases appetite and weight.

I have never been thin. But I grew up in a thin family that shames not being thin. But I always had a small waist BH which means I carry my weight pretty well despite not being small. I’ve averaged on overweight but not obese, borderline overweight BMI at my smallest. The new medication, being off the shot and being a stress eater means I probably gained 15-20 lbs in the last year. A lot of my clothes don’t fit. Part of me feels shame. But part of me also feels free. I’m married just a year. My husband is a tall and heavy broad guy who carries it well. He said his mother was never so thin and he doesn’t associate thin as beautiful, to him it’s the overall face and appearance not being a stick in itself. He doesn’t mind that I gained weight. It’s so different than the punishing world I came from. Both of us like to eat. I don’t want to gain too much for health reasons. I also struggle from stress and emotional eating, and the shot made my cravings stop and I know helps many people who struggle with overeating bc it regulates the hunger hormones. Anyhow I’m torn between that upbringing telling me I’m fat, for the first time in my life I’m close to plus size in clothing. I probably went from an 8 to a 12. I remember how my mother would tell me I would be big at a size 8. My mother and I drifted apart for many reasons. I’m sure she would be horrified to see my body. But in a way I feel kind of liberated. I understand why people often gain weight after marriage even before kids. Because if your husband doesn’t care if you’re stick skinny it takes a lot of the pressure off. But I also know I don’t feel good when I over eat which I have been doing.

amother

Denim

Sat, May 04 2024, 10:22 pm

I think you would do well with a combination of intuitive eating and also a diet that doesn't restrict volume or calories but is gut, blood sugar and hormone friendly and cuts out addictive foods that lend themselves to overeating like gluten, dairy and sugar. So a clean, whole food diet with focus on clean proteins and fats, plenty of fruits and veggies, treats made with unprocessed sweetners and gut friendly flours. That way you're not sabotaging your health, but also not feeling restricted or shamed, it's not about weight it's truly about health. The intuitive part will just help you lean in to how to stop when your full etc, and cutting addictive foods let's you listen to those cues better

amother

Denim

Sun, May 05 2024, 10:37 pm

amother Candycane wrote:

I think intuitive eating and clean eating/dieting are a contradiction.

OP, read Intuitive Eating. I think you will find it very validating.

I don't think they're a contradiction. I think intuitive eating fails because people eat addictive foods that bypasses their bodies instinctive signals. Once they remove those foods, they can hear themselves better.