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-> Parenting our children
amother
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Wed, May 15 2024, 10:53 am
What should I do with her?
She is the oldest, extremely mature and usually well behaved.
Recently she started this new behavior that she destroys things. She'll never do it in front of me, but I find stuff in the playroom.
One day she snapped her scissors in half, once shredded the strings to necklace bead toy, once colored all over the walls/floor and even ripped a book....
Very not like her. Its literally 1 year old behavior.
I didn't yell at her, just asked her why she is doing these things, she just started bawling and refused to talk about it.
I'm assuming she is doing it for attention? How do I respond its getting a little ridiculous and she is really ruining expensive things
ETA: I will add she definitely has sensory issues, maybe thats causing it?
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behappy2
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Wed, May 15 2024, 10:58 am
This to me seems like rage and her crying indicates something big might have happened that she isn't able to express. Can you hold her and tell her that you are there ready to listen as love her? Maybe have her draw what happened. If you're not able to help her and it doesn't resolve I would bring her to an experienced play therapist.
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amother
Caramel
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Wed, May 15 2024, 11:14 am
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Aurora
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Wed, May 15 2024, 11:21 am
behappy2 wrote: | This to me seems like rage and her crying indicates something big might have happened that she isn't able to express. Can you hold her and tell her that you are there ready to listen as love her? Maybe have her draw what happened. If you're not able to help her and it doesn't resolve I would bring her to an experienced play therapist. |
Yeah. It sounds like something is really wrong and she's not able to express it.
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amother
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Wed, May 15 2024, 12:02 pm
Did you have a baby recently or do you have a baby who has started to be more mobile, cute etc... ?
Edited because I originally wrote trauma- but I didn't mean trauma, I meant- it's possible it's a response to the baby which is a big change
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amother
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Wed, May 15 2024, 1:49 pm
Really, a trauma response? Didnt even think of that. how could it be if shes perfectly normal the rest of the time?
My baby is 5m old
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amother
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Wed, May 15 2024, 2:05 pm
amother OP wrote: | Really, a trauma response? Didnt even think of that. how could it be if shes perfectly normal the rest of the time?
My baby is 5m old |
I don't mean trauma. That didn't come out correctly. I had similar behavior with my son who was almost 4 when his little sibling was born. He had similar issues. I think it may have been a reaction to losing his place in the family as the youngest and not knowing how to sort through those feelings... For him also he didn't start acting out until the baby was a few months old- I was told this is when the baby got bigger, cuter, had more of a role, more of a real person, here to stay
I could be totally off base but it was like this with mine
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amother
Moonstone
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Wed, May 15 2024, 2:09 pm
Have this issue with my 4 year old. Very verbal and never had issues before
No baby but very prolonged illness before the spring (fever, flu noting serious).
Following!
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