my son loves to hurt kids to see them cry?

CHANY115

Thu, Oct 16 2008, 9:43 pm

what should I do........I went today with him for outings and he was in contact with kids in the playground and he started up with one child and then I redirected him and he went on so I put him in time out and then it wasnt done until I left. I was mad cause I traveled all the way to a certain play area and had my other kids with me so I couldnt just leave........he is sort of adhd, 4 year old

momof6

Thu, Oct 16 2008, 10:08 pm

Some children need to be taught how to play with others. It doesn't always come naturally. You mentioned ADDish behavior, a child that is impulsive may have a harder time learning to play. Socialising involves taking turns, waiting, empathising, tuning in to the nuances of body language and cultural norms- these things can be very hard for someone who has low impulse control and is easily distracted.)
Is he in school? If so, what do his teachers suggest? If not, I would suggest that you enroll him in a quality preschool program so that he has more opportunities to learn how to navigate the social and academic realm before Kindergarten.
The ideal situation for most children who don't yet know how to socialise at 4 is to be in a group setting with one-on-one supervision, a TSS (Theraputic Suppot Staff) can shadow him in the classroom, focusing on him alone, teaching him these important skills. A TSS can be paid for by medical assistance or private insurance if requested by a doctor, in the USA.

amother

Sat, Oct 18 2008, 11:26 pm

why is he doing that? is he upset about things? has he been taught how to use words? are his teachers good with him and watch the kids well? there can be many reasons for this. I would not be quick to call a normal kid who might be having something bothering him or might not yet know thr right behaviors (werent taught them correctly) adhd. punishments do not work. guidance and telling them what they should do does.

greenfire

Sun, Oct 19 2008, 10:07 am

if one child misbehaves the whole family unfortunately suffers ... he cannot go places to socialize if he cannot behave or if you cannot keep him away from hitting others ... keep repeating this to him - you cannot hit or you cannot go ... he should comprehend enough ... even if he is more hyper than the average kid ...