cleaning up after your kids when a guest

amother

Thu, Mar 02 2006, 7:26 pm

Do you think it's the hosts obligation or the parents to clean up the high chair when you are guests for a meal? I was a little surprised when my guest left the high chair with cholent smeared all over it. My husband thinks that we as hosts should be cleaning it up, but I felt that the mom should have offered. I would never say anything to a guest, but was just wondering what you all do when you are guests.

chen

Thu, Mar 02 2006, 8:53 pm

Miss Menschlich says that the well-bred guest always offers to help, but the well-bred hostess does not actually expect her guests to help. She may accept with gratitude any offers of help she receives but must not be offended if no such offers are made. yes, it's a double standard of sorts. such is life.

some ppl actually don't want guests doing any cleaning up lest they use the dishtowel instead of the cleaning shmatte or the floor shmatte instead of the table shmatte or something like that.

a guest must always, always, always without exception clean up body fluids of any type (after asking the hostess 'what shall I use to clean this up?"). Of course any guest with a baby has brought a supply of body-fluid-cleaning materials along with all the other baby paraphernalia, correct?

Miss Menschlich herself never finds it necessary to clean up after her children, pets or spouse in someone else's house because they would never dream of being so ill-bred as to make a mess in the first place.
Wink

1stimer

Fri, Mar 03 2006, 4:39 am

Quote:

Miss Menschlich herself never finds it necessary to clean up after her children, pets or spouse in someone else's house because they would never dream of being so ill-bred as to make a mess in the first place.

can I send my ds to u for some training?

chen

Fri, Mar 03 2006, 8:36 am

Miss Menschlich is pleased to announce the opening of the new Menschlich College of Etiquette/ Boot Camp and Dog Obedience School. Applications now being accepted for summer semester. LOL

chocolate moose

Fri, Mar 03 2006, 10:47 am

You can only do so much, if it's yomtov, for example. Don't forget, you're all dressed up, too, and if there are several meals in a row, chances are other babies will sit in the high chair, for example.

Raisin

Fri, Mar 03 2006, 10:59 am

Of course its nice to offer to help clean up; while your about it come over after shabbos and wash up all the plates, forks, cups etc your family members used, plus do your portion of vacuaming and floor washing.

Isn't cleaning up as well as cooking part of hachnoses orchim.

I appreciate when my guests offer to clean up, but I don't think its their obligation.

morningstar

Sat, Mar 04 2006, 8:42 pm

I suppose one's opinion on this matter depends somewhat on how many guests you tend to have.. how frequently they come without offering to help. ..and how much of a mess they tend to leave behind.

morningstar

Sat, Mar 04 2006, 8:42 pm

I suppose one's opinion on this matter depends somewhat on how many guests you tend to have.. how frequently they come without offering to help. ..and how much of a mess they tend to leave behind.

Mon, Mar 20 2006, 10:41 am

...and what about guests' kids making a huge mess with the toys and then they leave and you have to clean it all up? or even worse, I had 2 kids empty mouthwash over my bathroom an trample in baby's crib while theyre mum dozed off in my living room on a shabbos afternoon. she laughed it off and then went home.
I was brought up to put away the toys in a friends house before going home and I try and do the same with my little boy when we go visiting.

amother

Mon, Mar 20 2006, 10:57 am

When out, I clean up toys, highchairs, etc. Unless, the host insists that I don't. Some people like to do things themselves. But the offer is there. In my home, if someone does not clean up after their kids, I'm not bothered by it. I just take care of the mess! It's hard for some people to be out with their children! I do like when overnight guests make the beds before they leave. Even though I wash the sheets, it's a nice touch andthe beds look neat until I can wash them! (If they don't, it's OK, too).
What bothers me is when someone is staying over for Shabbos, and the mom sleeps in all morning while the kids all run around the house unattended! Especially when mine are still asleep!

happymom

Mon, Mar 20 2006, 11:13 am

its 100% the jon of the parent to clean up after their own child! when kids come to my house, make a mess and their parent are about to leave without cleaning up I say "KIDs, cmon, lets clean up the mess u made together... and we all sit down, clean it uo, and the parents usually get the hint..." with the highchair, id prob wash it in front of the mother so she would realize HOPEFULLY on her own...........! ITs so rude when ppl do that!

happymom

Mon, Mar 20 2006, 11:14 am

Quote:

What bothers me is when someone is staying over for Shabbos, and the mom sleeps in all morning while the kids all run around the house unattended! Especially when mine are still asleep!

why dont u tell those guest that if thier kids wake up before yours, they should please supervise them!? shock

amother

Mon, Mar 20 2006, 11:51 am

I tell them now! It's only happened once, and I was so completely caught off guard because I couldn't imagine anyone sleeping until noon (no joke!) in someone else's home! The woman I mentioned wasn't a friend It was a family staying in our home b/c of a youth group convention! I probably wouldn't mind watching a friend's kids a little bit, b/c I'd just ask her to watch mine later in the day!

mother48

Mon, Mar 20 2006, 3:46 pm

it's actually a huge pet peeve of mine when a guest, usually a sibling, leaves a dirty high chair, (b/c I hate cleaning them..) or leaves it the dinining room, and doesn't move it back to the kitchen. then my whole room seems messy to me, and stuff fall etc.. but is till invite them back:)