stupid cio-need some support

amother

Wed, Nov 18 2009, 11:58 am

I started letting my dd cio. I started yest and she cried for like 50 min. now im trying to get her to nap and its 1 1/2 hrs thats shes crying already. I need some support before I start crying. and only support not people telling me im doing the wrong thing. ive made up my mind that this is the only thing that I can try now.

sv9506

Wed, Nov 18 2009, 12:25 pm

When I did cio with my DS (worked really well, by the second night his crying was 5 minutes long) - I did not use cio for his nap, only at bedtime. I was never really concerned about naptime since DS wasn't a big napper and I didn't want to fight about that too. Night sleeping was important to me and when DS was tired he would sleep on his own during the day (or I would put him down when I saw his cues).

amother

Wed, Nov 18 2009, 12:29 pm

sv9506 wrote:

op here:
good for you but my dd is not so well behaved. shes in my hands the whole day and the second I put her into the crib she starts screeching. ive got to get her used to it. shes 9 mths. about time

amother

Wed, Nov 18 2009, 12:30 pm

AlwaysGrateful wrote:

Are you sure she's tired? Could it be you put her down too early?

(Sorry, I know how tough it is to cio, even when you know that's the best thing for your baby and for your family right now.)

she was as tired as can be. was cranky. kept on rubbing her eyes..uhhhhuuu dunno what to do! should I just go in and take her out?

marina

Wed, Nov 18 2009, 1:05 pm

CIO works like this.

First day: 3-4 hours of crying
Second day: 2-3 hours of crying
Third day 1-2 hours of crying
Fourth day: less than 1 hour of crying
Fifth day : less than 30 min

So you have a long road ahead if you just started. I suggest strongly that you go somewhere else in the house where you cannot hear the crying. Check in on her every once in a while, so she doesn't see you, if you are worried about her, but do not listen to her crying for 4 hours, it will make you nuts.

LookingForward

Wed, Nov 18 2009, 1:09 pm

did you read up on cio before you tried it? there's a lot written on it that you can find online. I used to put ds in, leave the room, and then come back 4 minutes later - just to soothe, not take him out, and then 6 minutes later, etc. each night I would wait an extra 2 or 3 minutes longer before I went in. it takes a lot of perseverence at the beginning, but then it pays off.
as far as the daytime naps, maybe try putting her in earlier. once they're over-tired, they really give you a hard time going to sleep. dd used to wake up 6:30-7:00 and had a morning nap at 9:00-9:30. I found the morning nap to be more important and necessary than the afternoon nap.
Good luck and remember this too shall pass...

ABC

Wed, Nov 18 2009, 1:30 pm

marina wrote:

I think this is a bad idea. it could be dangerous (some babies can make themselves vomit from crying and then choke on it ch'v). while I believe strongly in babies being in a good sleep routine, I do not believe in causing them heartache. in my experience, cio can work if you still go back into the room every 5 minutes or so and just reassure the baby - rub their back and tell them you are there. be soothing but don't take them out.

op you also mentioned how the baby is in your arms all day and then you only let go of her when you put her in her crib. cio may eventually work, but this is much harder as she's never out of your arms. introduce floor play. get down on the floor with her on the floor next to you and play together, so that she learns she can entertain herself a bit too and doesn't always need to be held. my kids ba'h are so used to playing on the floor by themselves from a very young age (week 2?!) that they know how to entertain themselves and have great imaginations. I have never been someone who holds my baby, I just don't have the physical strength for that.

good luck and stick at it. but don't leave your baby alone crying for very long. it's not necessary. she needs to know you are still there. Hug

GetReal

Wed, Nov 18 2009, 2:18 pm

I second the idea of concentrating on bedtime first, before naps. Kids are more tired at night, so it will work better. When you get to the point that you put her in the crib at bedtime, give her a kiss and say goodnight, and she falls asleep right away, then you can concentrate on naptime.

Also, with bedtime I knew my baby was tired. At naptime, there is always the chance that she is not ready for a nap yet and you are letting her cry but it just won't work...