Would it be unethical/dishonest...

amother

Thu, May 15 2014, 9:15 pm

amother wrote:

I can understand why you would be disappointed at the situation, but I'm puzzled as to why you would be fuming at the woman. I would personally be dlkz and assume that she either wasn't aware of the pregnancy yet when she accepted the job, or she may have been trying to conceive for years and this was a surprise for her too.

The timing was such that she was pregnant at the time of the interview. I was very open with the fact I needed coverage after the birth of my children. I disclosed to her my dr's cautions. LOL I obviously didn't need to. She assured me this wasn't a problem. She deceived me. I knew within 48 hrs of conception. I knew within weeks it was multiples. She was in her 40s at the time.

I had one other professional working for me in a general capacity. Instead of training her to concentrate in a specialized capacity, I could have trained him to take over me. As this wasn't his field of interest, I thought it was best for everyone to let her do my work. Unfortunately, I will think long and hard about hiring a woman in a critical position. She should have done the right and decent thing and not led me on to take on more work.

SRS

Thu, May 15 2014, 9:38 pm

We are very fortunate to live in a world where employees have certain rights. That said, don't forget about why people bring on employees. A hint, it isn't a chessed. That is why the amother was fuming. She had a business to run and maintain for the long term. The employee was supposed to help make that happen. She worked to train the employee for that specialized position, diverting resources to do that. She paid the employee. Her entire enterprise could have been taken under.

Women, when you aren't honest, you endanger your own reputation as an employee, you endanger someone else's business, and you endanger the ability of women to be considered for jobs.

MaBelleVie

Thu, May 15 2014, 9:40 pm

SRS wrote:

I don't understand what the employee did that was dishonest.

Is it unethical for a woman to take a position if she isn't on BC?!?!?

ETA I just saw amother later posted the woman knew about the pregnancy. Yeah, I agree that's unethical.

busydev

Thu, May 15 2014, 9:53 pm

op I would look at it this way. if you dont get pregnant would you have a problem working for them long term? would you have an issue putting in extra hours for tax season? if/when you do have another baby would you go back to work full time (or whatever the regular hours they are looking for are?) if you would be fine with it, then go for it.
some things you cant plan and its not worth putting your life on hold for maybes. like a single girl who wont take certain jobs cause "when I get married I wont want to work full time" well your not married and your not even seriously dating someone. if you have to quit when you get engaged or before you have your first kid, then do so then. same in this case where its still a hypothetical pregnancy AND it doesnt seem like you would be the only worker (like in the amother's terrible story, which is very diff imo because she was already pregnant)
hatzlocha!

amother

Thu, May 15 2014, 9:56 pm

SRS wrote:

So true. The business did go under about 6 months after I gave birth. I had nine employees. I was doing work and meeting clients while I still had a catheter from the c-section at the hospital. I decided I would rather be a SAHM then work like this.

I am incapable of giving this person a reference. Last I heard she was back teaching.

SRS

Thu, May 15 2014, 10:21 pm

Teaching is probably where she belongs. I'm pretty upset about the interruptions in education from maternity leaves, but everyone smiles and says mazel tov. That really isn't the case in certain professions and in small business.

ROFL

Thu, May 15 2014, 10:26 pm

I interviewed two young women for the same job. The first person looked pregnant to me her shirt was a bit tight , and when I talked about a two year commitment she was of course no problem.
I then interviewed another person, and when I asked about a commitment she told me she was one month pregnant but she plans to continue to work due to financial reasons. The second one got the job due to her honesty.

SRS

Thu, May 15 2014, 10:34 pm

MaBelleVie wrote:

Is it unethical for a woman to take a position if she isn't on BC?!?!?

Women and their birth control is an emotional subject. Take that out of the equation. I'm sure we could brainstorm and find many situations where a man accepting a job because of something known to him would not be perfectly ethical. Not every job is created equally.

grace413

Fri, May 16 2014, 3:19 am

LisaS wrote:

When you went to the interview, were you just seeking a temporary job for a few months? What were your intentions? If you really only want a temporary job then you should be up front about that. They are looking for someone who wants to continue long term. This has nothing to do with a possible maternity leave. If you do want to stay with them long term, then taking a 3 month maternity leave is just a normal part of a long term employment.

LisaS, you are in Israel right? OP is in the US where firms with less than 50 employees have no obligation to give any maternity leave at all - paid or unpaid. 3 month maternity leave is not the norm in a small business in the US.

Everybody works and is in business to make money. My DH has a small accounting firm and an employee leaving during tax season would cause us serious financial loss, not to mention the physical and emotional toll it would take on us. Hakol B'Ydei Shamyim.