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Forum
-> Parenting our children
amother
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Sun, Nov 09 2014, 7:33 am
DS doesn't seem to be able to express himself in an appropriate manner. What is the best way to teach him to communicate instead of hitting etc. and to let go of his frustration in an appropriate manner.
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moramom
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Sun, Nov 09 2014, 11:15 am
I have a very similar situation with my son at same age...he goes out once a week to social skills..but we sometimes talk thru puppets at home after a big blowover.. somehow talking thru puppets makes it more anonymous
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amother
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Sun, Nov 09 2014, 12:36 pm
OP here. He doesn't actually have social skills issues.
It's seems to be more a communication thing. He gets easily frustrated and immediately acts up. If he's upset with his brother he'll hit, kick etc. instead of coming to tell me what happened.
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33055
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Sun, Nov 09 2014, 12:45 pm
amother wrote: | OP here. He doesn't actually have social skills issues.
It's seems to be more a communication thing. He gets easily frustrated and immediately acts up. If he's upset with his brother he'll hit, kick etc. instead of coming to tell me what happened. |
Do you tell him to use his words? Do you listen and try to coax more out of him? Do you have him writing?
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amother
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Sun, Nov 09 2014, 1:06 pm
My ds is younger than yours but this works for us.
I offer a prize for ds starting a sentence with the words "my feelings are..."
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amother
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Fri, Mar 13 2015, 6:49 am
OP here. Still struggling with this... he's fighting and hitting his brother ALL the time...
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chani8
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Fri, Mar 13 2015, 7:08 am
Keep him away from his brother. Zero tolerance for violence. If he hits, stop him. Be a policeman and physically stop him from assaulting another human being. It's your other son's basic human right to not be abused. And then, just keep him away from others. Until he grows up a bit, or you figure out why in the world he's being so violent. If you don't know why the violence, take him to a therapy session or two. You'd be surprised how well kids unload their problems in therapy.
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Mommastuff
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Fri, Mar 13 2015, 9:53 am
Maybe he doesn't know the right words to communicate his frustration. Can you start your conversation with him by offering suggestions/questions of how he feels?
Example: "You sound frustrated that your brother doesn't let you have a turn with the toy!"
Teach him to understand his feelings and also to voice it to the perpetrator. Teach him how to ask for what he wants through words, not hitting.
You may want to talk to him in private so he doesn't feel attacked.
Hatzlocha!
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