When did you finally "make it."

Bitachon101

Wed, Dec 09 2015, 12:52 pm

I'm one of the posters that probably depressed the OP... (Sorry OP!!!)
Yet a thread like this gives me chizuk as well.
When I see ppl say that they are making it and can make it I know there's a light to look for at the end of the tunnel.
I know that frum life doesn't have to mean financial struggles and choking and that one day Hashem can decide to pull all of us that are struggling out of our rut and in a better place.
I understand Honest in terms of the wealthy or financial background vs someone trying to pull it off themselves. Not that someone with financial backing never struggles and never can complain... We all have a right to vent.
But there is a difference when someone knows they can always turn to daddy or grandpa if they really need vs not having that option. There is also a dif of someone "making it" completely on their own merit vs being started off comfortably and having to eventually navigate on their own and learn.
One has to start from Zero while the other starts from 25.

SRS

Fri, Dec 11 2015, 4:08 pm

A person who starts with gifts and a person who does not can end up in the same boat if they do the same thing: spend more than they have. Finances are pretty simple: make more than you spend. Consistently save. Avoid debt and pay cash. Buy for less.

As for making it, I don't know what that means, but for me the more I save, the more relaxed I am because, while I will always maintain disciplined spending, it becomes easier to purchase what have you knowing that you aren't living month to month.

seeker

Sat, Dec 12 2015, 8:09 pm

It's funny (or is it?), this week's Mishpacha had a column titled "making it" in which they interviewed 3 people whom I guess they consider to be "making it." This week's theme was kollel couples, specifically those who are not getting help. One of the couples says they are deeply in debt and often need to borrow more money to make it to the next paycheck. I don't get how that's "making it." Another couple is married 4 years with 2 kids and says they don't know how long their situation will be sustainable. I don't think they've "made it" yet either - just because they're managing now with two babies doesn't mean they are financially stable - consider that if they're married 4 years then they don't have a single tuition to pay yet. And they don't say whether they have any plan for a career for the husband when they decide kollel is not enough anymore. So to me that's not "made it" yet either - that's making it for today but I"m curious where this family will be in 5 years. Maybe one of the people interviewed actually seemed to be "making it" in any real sense.

amother

Goldenrod

Sat, Dec 12 2015, 8:41 pm

I considered it making it when we started paying for the cellphone plan I was on since I was a girl in a family plan. About 4 yrs after we got married. Still I know that in the real sense of "making it" were not. I work part time and my husband full time bringing us to about 85k pre tax. We can save now. Bought house. Own two old cars. But I will be quitting my job to go back to school so we will be really tight again soon. Two kids in school. The easy thing to do would be to stay in my job but then as famiky grows things will prob always be tight. Our goal is that dh should iyh advance to fully support us but that my income give us the oppurtunity to think bigger, invest. Neither of us come from money. That is something I am proud of. Dh does not like to acknowledge this. He feels like its just an excuse not to be doing well. like saying "I yell at my kids cuz thats how I was raised". May be true but won't get you anywhere.