A bit confused about orchos chaim (in Lakewood)

amother

Salmon

Sun, Aug 07 2016, 9:28 pm

I find on every orchas Chaim thread that there are four amother who try to portray the school as a yeshivish school.

The school is a great school but it's not for learning parents. Most parents that send there the husbands never even learned in bmg.

Most yeshivish parents want Yiddish there are a few that don't because kids have learning issues but the typical learning guy wants his son to learn Yiddish in school.

Also it's a very wealthy school and yeshivish parents and especially fathers who are learning they don't want to expose their kids to higher hasagos so they will purposely not send there not to influence their child.

amother

Green

Mon, Aug 08 2016, 5:05 am

amother wrote:

As I mentioned before, I work in the school. Overall, the school is not particularly yeshivish but there are a nice handful of yeshivish kids in each grade. And there are plenty of fathers who did previously learn in BMG.

It's a great school, very well run but again, it's a very big mix so to say that it's all one way or the other isn't true.

amother

Slateblue

Mon, Aug 08 2016, 7:06 am

I am a YOC parent. I think I dress to a pretty high standard of tznius, my DH wears colored shirts, has a very yeshivish, simple life hashkafa, and learns every day.

- Parent's dress - in the school the parents are always dressed pretty tznius. They dress trendy, with longer than typical sheitels, clothing may be a bit tight. But for the most part I find most wear tights, cover knees mainly, etc.
- Yeshivishness - there is a big mix. I find in the younger grades they seperate the classes very much by levels of yeshivishness, although it could just be how it worked out for all my boys their classes had a high percentage of yeshivish parents, when the classes were mixed in 3rd grade I saw a larger mix of kids. The mothers I've become friends with through my kids are pretty yeshivish. Their husbands recently left learning. They dress to a higher level of tzinius. I know this isn't typically, but I think it happened because of how the school is divided. While its not a yeshivish school at all (especailly compared to other options in town) I do know yeshivish families who switched one child there because of its services and moved all their kids. It is a fantastic school.
- Outside influences - my kid's have zero access to movies, computers, etc. We don't really discuss sports a lot. My DH would be open to go to a baseball game while on vacation. My kid's have not come home knowing about anything. I know some show jewish or old movies at home, I haven't come across any Disney or other movies. I know the hanhala is pretty strict about it being discussed in school. I also know they aren't anti- going to baseball games, it just shouldn't be a way of life. I find the peer pressure with wealth to be much more difficult.

I think many parents choose to send there because:
-Very high level of academics. They take their English program very seriously.
- No Yiddish. This was very impotant to my DH who found yiddish to be a stumbling block for him. He loves how my boys are truly learning to translate every word.
- Run well. The school is run very well, organized, responsible, everything is on time.
- Great services. Very on top of how kids are performing.

Sorry for the long megilla.

amother

Blue

Mon, Aug 08 2016, 2:23 pm

Thank you for everyone chiming in.

I believe I dress tznius and that I am frum. However I don't dress "yeshivish" and I was concerned how nervous I have to be going out and about.

From the way the guidelines were written my husband was starting to get very nervous that if I get seen outside not abiding with the rules, we will be getting called into the school. Of course I am not talking about going to a school meeting, rather just being out and about around town.