bar mitzva and conecert the same night

chen

Fri, Aug 03 2007, 9:10 am

momof3 wrote:

I think we are all surprised that you asked the question.

Quite. Social Priority Rule # 1 is Family Comes First. No matter what your own preference might be, Family Comes First.

Now if you had said you have a conflict between the bar mitzvoh of a fourth cousin whom you never met and whose mother you met only once, and the chasunoh of your best friend, that would be a dilemma to wrestle with. But a family simchoh and a concert? It shouldn't even be a question.

There are times in life when what we would like to do and what we know we should do are in conflict. Choosing to do what we should do rather than what we'd like to do is called maturity.

miriamnechama

Fri, Aug 03 2007, 9:43 am

yup these conflicts happen all the time... last year I had a cousins wedding and best friends bar mitzva the same night, well after the wedding went over to her for 2 minutes. actually baked her cakes as well. and now another one some friend of the fam who I'm not so close with makes a wedding the same night as another bar mitzva of a friend of mine.. so this time I'm sending dh to the wedding cusit's far out I'll go for the bare mitzva which is across the street from me.

the only time I really went against what I would do was when my sil's sister made bar mitzva the same night of a neighbour... I was gonna travel in for it but bang that day got burnt so badly that I was too weak to to shlepp out so sent dh, and went to the neighbours locally.

dh actually told me that if I wanted to fit in both... I should have left much earlier, but when kids fight and you can't concentrate that's what happens. well they had a good time anyways and it was good for them to meet cousins who live far.

my sils went for 5 minutes and left for the concert,. also we didn't realize till later that he is the last 1st cousin to be bar mitzva, now we're moving on to nephews and second cousins. and also his only brother could come from vienna cus his wife gave birth a day be fore, so I suppose it was important for them that every one come.

also you know the saying... you want people to come to you... you need to go to theirs