Letter by a mother to her 2yo daughter during holocaust.

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amother

Scarlet

Sun, Jul 22 2018, 11:37 pm

btw, the original writer was very clear that it was fiction. It's only after other people took it and started passing it out that things got muddled.

I don't agree with the way she made her point, but I do want to point out that she did not intend to pass it off as a real letter written during the holocaust.

anon for this

Mon, Jul 23 2018, 12:10 am

amother wrote:

That was actually really painful. I'm a working mother and my baby goes to a wonderful home day care but this brought out all the emotions I had when I came to the decision that for me to work would make me a better mother. Oh the tears I shed. But looking back, we're both healthier and happier now. And then reading this made me beat myself up again. And then it's made up. Sigh. If only the author knew how much she hurt me and mothers like me. If it were real I could pen a letter back explaining my journey to this decision. But no, it's just someone trying to play with my emotions and boy did she succeed.

For those who claim that this is a nice story and causes no harm even if untrue, here is an example of the harm it can cause.

As I wrote before, I don't believe that someone who had been handed over to strangers, never to see her parents again, would ever watch toddlers traveling to daycare and compare her situation to theirs.

Amother khaki, you have thoughtfully considered that working outside the home is best for your family. You found an excellent day care for your child. I'm sure you send your child off every day with love, and pick him up with love, and care for him when you are together. You don't "throw out your child before he's ready", and you probably spend time "rocking your child in the sun". If you ever did find that your child wasn't thriving, you would most likely change the situation.

People will always tear down mothers who work outside the home for all kind of reasons, whether because they genuinely believe that they know what's best for you, or because it makes them feel better about their own choices. Amother khaki, there's no way some anonymous letter writer knows your child and your family better than you do. And you owe it to yourself, your child, and your family to do what's best for all of you.

amother

Purple

Mon, Jul 23 2018, 12:18 am

amother wrote:

You made the best decision for you and your baby. You are making the sacrifices needed for the benefit of your child. I’m sorry this letter caused you pain. The exploration turned me off tremendously. Sometimes you need that break or the money or whatever it may be in order to be the best mother you can be. Focus on quality if quantity is limited. You sound like a wonderful selfless mom.

amother

Beige

Mon, Jul 23 2018, 6:06 am

amother wrote:

I know where this was originally published and no, she did not reveal anywhere that it was fiction.

amother

Pink

Mon, Jul 23 2018, 9:24 am

As a writer, this looks like a work of fiction to me, unless it's a bad translation. I believe a real mother going through something so horrific would have written more, there appear to be too many holes. Having said that, it's heartbreaking and very moving.

nechamashifra

Mon, Jul 23 2018, 1:40 pm

I'm so tired of reading fake articles and seeing them shared and reposted all over the place. It has come to the point that I was skeptical just from reading the title of this post.

Using the holocaust to get attention is a new low. It should be illegal.

Mommyg8

Mon, Jul 23 2018, 1:51 pm

This article was circulating before I had my first child, 25 years ago. And yes, it gave me a lot of guilt, especially as mine was the first generation to send out our babies to babysitters. Looking back, I can't believe I was that gullible (maybe because there was no imamother then).

anon for this

Mon, Jul 23 2018, 2:08 pm

Mommyg8 wrote:

I read an article about 15 years ago in a Jewish magazine by someone who wrote how she was much better than working mothers because she baked her own challah and never bought takeout. Also, she grated potatoes and fried her own latkes for chanukah instead of buying frozen ones. For a while I felt guilty about that, because I was working then and bought frozen latkes (OK, tater tots) for chanukah. After I thought about it I realized that my kids didn't really care whether we had tater tots or homemade latkes, and that while the tater tots baked in the oven I had time to play dreidel with them, which they did appreciate. Even if I hadn't been working I still wouldn't have spent lots of time baking or cooking from scratch, because I would've spent more time with my kids instead.

And that's when I realized that the entire premise of the article was flawed because the author was assuming she knew what my family needed better than I did. Of course she didn't.

amother

Pink

Mon, Jul 23 2018, 7:23 pm

Mommyg8 wrote:

Here ladies, is a link to an actual true story:

http://www.aish.com/h/9av/mm/A.....e=yes

I watched this today. I gave my daughter lots of extra hugs after watching this Sad

So heartbreaking!!! I can't stop seeing this young mother's face.

amother

Seagreen

Mon, Jul 23 2018, 9:03 pm

amother wrote:

I had the same response, and I never even sent my kids to daycare! It made me think of all the times I did things like sent my two year old to a 2 hour playgroup so I could take care of his infant sibling... And feel guilty that I didn't keep him home to be "rocked in the sunshine" while I nursed the baby (however that was supposed to work)...

My emotions were played, and not really for any reason. But I did cry for the pain of all mothers at that time, and long for Moshiach, so I guess there was some good in posting this : (

amother

Seagreen

Mon, Jul 23 2018, 9:03 pm

amother wrote:

amother

Mint

Tue, Jul 24 2018, 12:23 am

amother wrote:

I had the same reaction. I wish with all my heart that I could be a stay at home mother. But I can’t. It hurts so much when people shame working mothers like this.

trixx

Tue, Jul 24 2018, 3:16 am

I was skeptical as I read it. The tone, sentence structure, language do not sound Holocaust-era. It reads like bad Jewish fiction.

amother

Seagreen

Tue, Jul 24 2018, 7:59 am

trixx wrote:

I was skeptical as I read it. The tone, sentence structure, language do not sound Holocaust-era. It reads like bad Jewish fiction.

Yup. Did not sound like a translation from Yiddish, the tone and syntax were totally off. It was powerful and made me cry and feel guilty, but I suspected it was fictional from the beginning.

amother

Chartreuse

Tue, Jul 24 2018, 8:48 am

trixx wrote:

I was skeptical as I read it. The tone, sentence structure, language do not sound Holocaust-era. It reads like bad Jewish fiction.

I was thinking the same. The language didn't jibe- not as a translation and the content is anachronistic. While parents have always loved their children, the concept of secure and loving attachment was not a thing until well after the Holocaust. And plenty of women in der heim worked. Nobody in my family was a SAHM, most of the women were running businesses and one or two had professional careers. Women running businesses was actually pretty common, being a professional less so but not unheard of.

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