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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Manners & Etiquette
amother
Teal
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 9:17 am
What is a polite way to tell someone else’s child not to touch my baby or toddler?
Specifically if the other kid is special needs. I mean I understand the parent is trying their best and some SN kids are very friendly. But don’t touch my kid! There are so many viruses and things going around now and I don’t know you!
I feel like I’m so rude to say don’t touch or I just pick up my kid and go the other way but I gotta do what I gotta do. Some kids don’t stop when I ask them not to touch.
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Zehava
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 9:19 am
Is this your first child?
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amother
Violet
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 9:25 am
amother wrote: |
I feel like I’m so rude to say don’t touch or I just pick up my kid and go the other way but I gotta do what I gotta do. Some kids don’t stop when I ask them not to touch. |
Nope. That's totally normal. You ask, then pick up your kid and move them if it really bugs you that much. Most people only do this if the other kid is hitting though
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amother
Papaya
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 9:26 am
What do you mean by "touching"? Your child can catch a virus from being around other kids, not necessarily from touching. Newborns I dont let others touch, but toddlers? A tap on the shoulder or holding hands... that's normal.
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daagahminayin
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 9:26 am
I engage in a friendly way: “Isn’t she cute? Look, but don’t touch. Do you know what her name is? Shall I tell you? Make sure you don’t touch her because she’s very little...”
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Zehava
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 9:32 am
amother wrote: | What do you mean by "touching"? You're child can catch a virus from being around other kids, not necessarily from touching. Newborns I dont let other touch, but toddlers? A tap on the shoulder or holding hands... that's normal. |
Not to mention that toddlers will plunge their hands into toilets and eat off the floor. Can’t say other kids are the only source of germs for them.
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amother
Teal
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 9:39 am
Not my first kid, by far. Wow what a way to make me feel like an idiot.
If I see a random stranger kid approaching my toddler with their arms outstretched at the level to touch their face you bet I will run to rescue him. Am I so weird? Especially if we are in a doctors office. Seriously I don’t need another virus.
If I’m rushing through my shopping and a kid wants to touch my baby no I will not engage in friendly conversation. I’m in a rush.
If I was relaxing on a park bench it would be a different story.
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pesek zman
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 9:41 am
“No thank you. Johnny needs a bit of space”
I teach my kid to say this in the first person (but not because of germs: I don’t care about that. I just want her to feel comfortable expressing her needs and desires in a polite way)
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amother
Oak
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 9:53 am
I'm just curious why random people are touching your baby in the first place.
I get comments about how cute my baby is, but people don't usually just touch.
And you say she is special needs... I think that actually makes people MORE, not less, standoffish, no?
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Chayalle
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 10:01 am
I used to teach kids to only touch my baby's feet - "make nice" - rather than touch face, hands, head, etc....much safer for my baby and other kid can feel good.
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amother
Turquoise
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 10:03 am
Simply maneuver away your carriage. If the child persists on touching face or eyes say firmly please don’t touch the face. I know you’re worried about germs and viruses but children interact by touching each other. And like another poster said if your child is old enough teach her/him to say please don’t touch me.
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amother
Papaya
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 10:05 am
OP, please explain why you don't want "especially special needs" kids touching your kids. Do they carry more germs? I find this pretty offensive.
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cm
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 10:06 am
"Look with your eyes, not your hands, please." Say it in a pleasant, smiley sort of way. When your own baby is involved, it's quite ok to instruct other people's children how to behave.
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daagahminayin
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 10:18 am
amother wrote: | OP, please explain why you don't want "especially special needs" kids touching your kids. Do they carry more germs? I find this pretty offensive. |
I’m not OP but I understood this to mean simply that some SN kids are very friendly and want to touch her baby, and might have difficulty following the instruction not to.
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amother
Teal
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 10:20 am
amother wrote: | OP, please explain why you don't want "especially special needs" kids touching your kids. Do they carry more germs? I find this pretty offensive. |
Omg that’s not what I meant!
I said I need advice specifically for when SN kids try to touch because they often don’t know not to touch and I don’t want the parents to think I have a problem with them. I know parents of SN kids are more sensitive. If I say don’t touch will the parents get offended?
My kid is not SN.
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amother
Vermilion
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 10:28 am
amother wrote: | OP, please explain why you don't want "especially special needs" kids touching your kids. Do they carry more germs? I find this pretty offensive. |
Are you purposely talking stupid?
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naturalmom5
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 10:30 am
OP..You are right, but what will you do when your child is in school or playgroup.
You can't helicopter 24/7. If your child has a healthy immune system you can only let thembe children and davern..
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amother
Jetblack
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Fri, Jan 18 2019, 10:42 am
naturalmom5 wrote: | OP..You are right, but what will you do when your child is in school or playgroup.
You can't helicopter 24/7. If your child has a healthy immune system you can only let thembe children and davern.. |
This is probably the only time I agree with her. Stop worrying and relax.
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