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-> Interesting Discussions
PeanutMama
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:09 pm
....plan to someday go to the kosel?
My husband is as chasidish as it gets. His ideas are satmar (anti zionist and I forgot what!) but we’re not really fully affiliated with any chasidus. My husband is the type to go to different shuls so we don’t have one set shul to go to. But I know he goes to various chasidish (pupa slonim breslov and I don’t know what else) shuls. On our first date I asked if he would be open to visiting Israel since I’m close to the holy places there (the kosel, maaras hamachpela kever rochel etc) and he said yes!! Honestly I was surprised to hear that but got over the initial shock after a while.
Now I wasn’t chasidish before marriage. I was more like litvish I guess. So now a little background.....
I was in Israel only once before I was married for Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. I went to the kosel many times during my 2 week stay and I loved it so much that I cried for 2 days straight after I left and mamash wanted to live there at some point just so I can go to the kosel and the other places I’ve been to just to daven my heart out. I guess I can say that I just felt closer to hashem there.
So NOW we are BH going to be married a year tomorrow and I’m longing for a visit. I talked to my husband about it many times and he said once we’ll have the money we’ll go!!
But I’m nervous.
We look very chasidish and my husband’s ideas are satmar yet he’s willing to go to the kosel with me.
Is that super unusual or am I overthinking??
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amother
Crimson
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:12 pm
Huh????? The kosel is packed with chassidim other than ultra satmar
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amother
Ivory
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:13 pm
I beg you to please post this in the chassidish section. Most women here will have no idea what you're taking about.
I'm chassidish and your post is very weird. No one will find it funny if you go to the kosel.
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giselle
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:13 pm
Why wouldn’t someone go to the kosel?
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ra_mom
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:16 pm
Just concentrate on your inner feelings and block out the rest of the world. It doesn't matter what others think.
But just so you know, the two of you will not stick out at all from the types of crowds there.
Soak in every minute.
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amother
Cyan
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:18 pm
Do you have a regular mentor?
I'm Satmar but this makes me sad.
I'm furious at people that take innocent converts and make them believe the most extreme shita possible.
Of course you can and should go to the Kosel. Go connect with your heritage. You've come such a long way. Don't let these things stop you.
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PeanutMama
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:22 pm
okay let me clarify...
I tried joining the chasidish groups but I’m not getting any luck getting in...
and yes we are converts!! And we decided together that we will go to the kosel while my husbands friends won’t (I have friends too but not chasidish) go at all and they ALL said that they will not go etc etc
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trixx
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:22 pm
Are you worried about your husband's level of chassidishkeit or about looking satmar at the kosel? (don't worry about the latter, no one's looking and there are all kinds there)
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PeanutMama
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:25 pm
amother [ Cyan ] wrote: | [b]Do you have a regular mentor? [/b]
I'm Satmar but this makes me sad.
I'm furious at people that take innocent converts and make them believe the most extreme shita possible.
Of course you can and should go to the Kosel. Go connect with your heritage. You've come such a long way. Don't let these things stop you. |
My husband goes to a rav to ask these types of things. I’m way way wayyy too nervous to even think what this rav will say.
But BH he said we’ll go.
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PeanutMama
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:29 pm
I know there are chasidim there I’ve seen them when I was there personally it’s just I think I’m worried what my husbands friends will think or say?
And also I heard that satmars don’t go there but I forgot the exact reason why
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amother
Rose
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:32 pm
miriess1 wrote: | okay let me clarify...
I tried joining the chasidish groups but I’m not getting any luck getting in...
and yes we are converts!! And we decided together that we will go to the kosel while my husbands friends won’t (I have friends too but not chasidish) go at all and they ALL said that they will not go etc etc |
Posting anonymously because I've mentioned number one to some people irl
1- I was by the Kosel when the Satmar Rebbe was in town several years back. While he didn't go there, I definitely saw hundreds of ladies with seams and covered sheitels that friday night. They were obviously from the shtarke chassidim because they were from the ones who came along on that trip.
2- My grandfather was friends with the Rebbe zy"a and went to the Kosel with his full knowledge . It was always something that came with exceptions
3- As for fitting in- no one's looking at you when you're there. There are all types of yidden there including people who will look much more chassidish than you . For example, toldos avraham yitzchak goes. They wear black tichels, black tights..
poil ois alis gits
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amother
Tangerine
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:33 pm
miriess1 wrote: | I know there are chasidim there I’ve seen them when I was there personally it’s just I think I’m worried what my husbands friends will think or say?
And also I heard that satmars don’t go there but I forgot the exact reason why |
Why are you worried about what his friends will think or say? What would be the consequences of them not agreeing with his decision?
You really, really, really need YOUR OWN mentor. Who mentored you during your journey to frum life? Your journey is not over. You need someone to speak with regularly and get ongoing chizuk and reality checks.
Also, you need a rav that you and your dh respect and you can speak to together when issues come up that affect both of you.
When I say need, I mean need. It's a mitzvah to do those things and very dangerous not to.
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yerushamama
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:40 pm
We are part of a chassidus where the men don't really go to the kosel (more because of tznius issues). Our rav holds more according to the Satmar shita. I do go to the kosel on occasion when I have something specific that I am davening for, but I have started to connect more with Kever Rochel.
There are many, many chassidim at the kosel when I go. Try to avoid going around Rosh Chodesh because of demonstrations for and against the "women at the wall", and you may not want to advertise it around Satmar that you are going. Interestingly, when my DD's school goes, and they skip it, often some of the Satmar girls do go.
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gingertop
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:40 pm
miriess1 wrote: | I know there are chasidim there I’ve seen them when I was there personally it’s just I think I’m worried what my husbands friends will think or say?
And also I heard that satmars don’t go there but I forgot the exact reason why |
If you're not exactly Satmar then definitely don't worry about it. There are a lot of Satmar affiliates and even Satmar people themselves that go to the Kosel.
Don't worry about your husband's friends. They can sort themselves out. What's important is that you get to go to the Kosel where you have such a strong attachment.
Also, if you don't go the Kosel, kever Rochel, Me'aras Hamachpeila, there is very little to do here that is a spiritual trip. Besides for Meron, what will you do?
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trixx
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:43 pm
miriess1 wrote: | I know there are chasidim there I’ve seen them when I was there personally it’s just I think I’m worried what my husbands friends will think or say?
And also I heard that satmars don’t go there but I forgot the exact reason why |
Then you have no reason not to. Other than the 613, only do what you understand + agree with.
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yerushamama
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:46 pm
miriess1 wrote: | I know there are chasidim there I’ve seen them when I was there personally it’s just I think I’m worried what my husbands friends will think or say?
And also I heard that satmars don’t go there but I forgot the exact reason why |
Satmar doesn't go because the government has taken political control of this makom kodosh and is increasingly using it for ceremonies and they are against the government. They still hold that it is a makom kodosh, but honestly, I find it hard to focus there when there are ceremonies going on. Try going at a quiet time - I used to love going at night.
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gingertop
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Mon, Jun 24 2019, 11:50 pm
yerushamama wrote: | Satmar doesn't go because the government has taken political control of this makom kodosh and is increasingly using it for ceremonies and they are against the government. They still hold that it is a makom kodosh, but honestly, I find it hard to focus there when there are ceremonies going on. Try going at a quiet time - I used to love going at night. |
That's not why Satmar doesn't go. They equally don't go to Kever Rochel, etc.
And they do go to Meron which is controlled by the same Ministry of Religious Affairs. It has to do with the June War.
Read "Al Hageulah V'al hatemura"
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amother
Crimson
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Tue, Jun 25 2019, 12:15 am
Sorry I missed the part that you’re converts. Now your OP makes more sense to me.
Just go without worry. There are ALL types at the kosel. For real. I promise.
It’s a super amazing experience
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amother
Ruby
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Tue, Jun 25 2019, 12:19 am
Essentially the Satmar rebbe said that the capture of Yerushalayim and much of the Biblical heartland was not miraculous, because Hashem doesn't do miracles for ovdei avoda zara. (His term, not mine.) The Six Day War was entirely natural, and he didn't want people to visit places captured in the Six Day War, because they might feel gratitude to the IDF.
Even some Satmar chassidim have found this particular position difficult to accept.
You'll see many Jews of all kinds at the kotel.
Op, do you have children? If you are not sending kids to school yet, I would look around and read before committing to a particular stream of yiddshkeit. Maybe you are in a place that suits you, but maybe not. Don't commit until you understand your options.
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yerushamama
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Tue, Jun 25 2019, 1:18 am
I stand corrected. I guess that I was misinformed.
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