After how many kids

Log in / Sign Up

List of Forums + New Post Recipe Box Usergroups Following My Posts Bookmarks

Private Messages Advanced Search Rules New User Guide FAQ Advertise Contact Us

Forum -> Household Management -> Cleaning & Laundry

After how many kids

1 2 Next

View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother

Sun, May 17 2020, 1:48 am

Did you feel like you Wanted cleaning help?

Did you feel like you needed cleaning help?

Did you feel like it was a real crises not to have for a few weeks?

amother

Gray

Sun, May 17 2020, 1:51 am

3 kids ka''h. I am at the wanting stage. will see if it ever happens Smile

problem is, my hubbies theory is that you have to clean up for them, and end up causing extra pressure. also careful who comes into the house for tznius reasons. dh does help out though... so he has rights to an oppinion Very Happy

amother

Forestgreen

Sun, May 17 2020, 1:53 am

Totally depends

... On how involved and helpful is your husband

... Your strengths

... Your health

... How big your house is

... Your standards, your husbands standards

... Your work schedule

... Your upbringing

... Your income

... How many kids, how close in age

I'm sure I missed something

So the real question is - how do you feel OP? There is no right or wrong answer

amother

Black

Sun, May 17 2020, 1:55 am

I'm a messy person. DH wanted cleaning help before our first was born!

We got someone regularly only after we had 7. Now we have more, but no more cleaning help Sad

The kids have gotten MUCH better about cleaning up after themselves, and most of them have learned to clean up a room. Even my 5-year-old can clean up a messy living room by herself (given sufficient motivation, of course).

I have also gotten better about cleaning over the years. Not GOOD, but definitely better. I think it helps that we are in a larger space.

amother

Crimson

Sun, May 17 2020, 2:21 am

Until I had 3 kids I never once had a cleaning lady (my mishugas). After 3rd I didn't have steady, only when I felt I need. Asked friends, neighbors etc

tichellady

Sun, May 17 2020, 2:32 am

Cleaning help was way more helpful before kids because it actually lasted. Now it doesn’t feel as worth it because it gets undone so quickly

amother

Jetblack

Sun, May 17 2020, 3:21 am

We got a cleaning lady when I was pregnant with our first. I was so incredibly sick and DH was working crazy hours and our place got really grimy. I was throwing up all the time anyway, but just walking into the bathroom that hadn't been cleaned in who knows how long made me vomit even more often. I couldn't even open our fridge without running to throw up. Finding a good cleaning lady was the best thing we could have done at that point and we've kept her on once a week for the past 13 years.

amother

Cyan

Sun, May 17 2020, 3:33 am

I had a long singlehood and lived in many different apartments, including one with cats. Some apartments were just very difficult to keep clean even as a single person (especially the one with cats, but even ones with no such "risk factor"). Now I live in a very small, but new (more likely newly remodeled, idk) apartment and B"H I find it easy to keep clean even with two little kids.

amother

Tan

Sun, May 17 2020, 7:24 am

2 kids. Really cute kids, but each with their own challenges. Not managing the mess!!
DH has mental health issues and does not pitch in much. I had the virus and was quite sick and my house got so messy and dirty over those 2+ weeks and I can't dig myself out of that hole; it just keeps getting worse!! Need cleaning help ASAP! I would take mine since she's been home since March and isn't going to anyone else's s house, but I can't afford it now because I'm not working now and DH income is lower than my rent.

amother

Seafoam

Sun, May 17 2020, 7:31 am

When I started working full time once a week before kids. After kids increased to 3times a week evenings. Now every evening bh. Where I live it is cheap. It's one thing I splurge. Rarely go on vacation.

mommy3b2c

Sun, May 17 2020, 7:45 am

I had cleaning help before kids. An hour and a half a week. Depending on lots of other factors, I’ve had different amounts of time since then. I think I only didn’t have for a total of 7 months and it was really hard. I had 2 kids at the time. Ages 1-3.

amother

Fuchsia

Sun, May 17 2020, 8:41 am

I got cleaning help after baby #1. I went back to work when Baby was 2 weeks old, so I didn't exactly have much time to do everything myself. Cleaning help came 1x a week and stayed for 2 hours. I am a clean and neat person in general, so it didn't take much. Just the bathrooms, floors, fold and put away laundry, oven. Fridge every other week. Change linen every other week.

amother

Crimson

Sun, May 17 2020, 8:50 am

tichellady wrote:

Cleaning help was way more helpful before kids because it actually lasted. Now it doesn’t feel as worth it because it gets undone so quickly

For me, after 3rd baby, it was more for getting the back of house cleaned up and floors washed. I was very overwhelmed then and didn't get cleaning done. Bedrooms were..........blah It's not always so much about stuff laying around to be put away, rather getting linen stripped and then put back on, and actually sweep and wash floors!!!! But yes, sometimes there were so many things laying around. Sometimes not even that kids did. So yes, for me then, a cleaning lady was crucially important. Bh I'm past that stage

Tzutzie

Sun, May 17 2020, 9:07 am

I grew up with sporadic very minimal cleaning help. So I still had to help out clean. Wash floors ans toilets at times.
So although I knew how to clean when I got married I was too exhausted after a 8-10 hour workday. And besides, I HATE cleaning with ppl around which before my kids, dh was home when I came home from work, so did he.... And later I had the kids around..... So I would have someone come in for 1-1.5 hours to do my cleaning. My apt was tiny and I'm a neat amd tidy person. So there wasnt that mich cleaning other than washing floors/toilrt. At the time is was $10 an hour. So for $10-15 a week my house was clean.
Even after my first was born it was same.
Then we moved to a bigger apt, the kids started making messes. It upped to 3 hours a week.
For a chunk of time I didn't have cleaning help and it was very hard. I was overwhelmed, overworked, resentful and miserable.
Later we moved to a bigger house and that added another hour or 2 of cleaning help. Making it to 5 hours.
When I was pregnant with my 3rd, I added another 3-4 hours and split it in 2.
So we had monday and friday 4-5 hours each.
After the newborn stage passed, it went down to 3-4 hours 2x week, Monday and Friday.

amother

Sun, May 17 2020, 1:26 pm

Thanks for your responses everyone

amother

Sun, May 17 2020, 5:33 pm

No one else has or wants cleaning help?

giselle

Sun, May 17 2020, 5:36 pm

I’ve had cleaning help since before I had kids. Now mine hasn’t come in over two months. And I see why I need one Very Happy

amother

Peach

Sun, May 17 2020, 5:40 pm

Yeshivish lkwd mom here. Have a business work very full/overtime.
Had 2 hours a week before kids. And over the years got more high maintenance. When I was preg with my 3rd I took 4 hours a day. Now I had my 3rd I have full time she also watches the baby..

chocolatecake

Sun, May 17 2020, 5:41 pm

I got when I had three kids. Once I had there was no turning back.

Ema of 5

Sun, May 17 2020, 5:57 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Did you feel like you Wanted cleaning help?

Did you feel like you needed cleaning help?

Did you feel like it was a real crises not to have for a few weeks?

I had a cleaning lady almost since the beginning, before I had kids, because I was in school. I just couldn’t keep up with my school work AND the housework.
4 kids later, we have a cleaning lady 3x/week, and I definitely need her. We’ve been surviving through without her, obviously, but I will be super happy when she comes back. I don’t think it was a crisis exactly, that she hasn’t been here, but it is reminding me why I need her in the first place.

Page 1 of 2

1 2 Next