Hotel care package for chassan kallah

heidi

Thu, Feb 11 2021, 1:19 pm

Crookshanks wrote:

When I got married we didn't have time to go grocery shopping for three days... We ate supper at sheva brachos but some of them started late and we were constantly starving! Breakfast and lunch food is super important!

Huh?
For3 full days you didn't have time to buy yourselves food??
I'd be interested to understand why not?

amother

Aubergine

Thu, Feb 11 2021, 1:19 pm

I really dont understand what anyones problem is. I live in a city where there are groceries and eateries on every corner and yet our parents stocked up the fridge and apartment before we got married and sent a large breakfast the next morning after the wedding. It was really really appreciated. We were young and just beginning to figure out life also sheva brachos is very tiring and exhausting and you cant go anywhere alone that it meant the world to us knowing they had our backs!

amother

Lime

Thu, Feb 11 2021, 1:23 pm

I would not pick up a choson kalah for breakfast!!!

Bit it would be nice if the room had bagels, cream cheese, oj, muffins... For breakfast.
And snacks like fruit or vegetable, dessert, chocolate, water bottles...
Op, make sure the hotel room had two queens, not one king! Smile

writinggirl

Thu, Feb 11 2021, 1:35 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Maybe it’s minhag?

During sheva brachos you don’t go out without a shomer (which autocorrects to shower 😂 😂 😂)

That’s what we keep. I don’t know what anyone else does.

I never heard of this. OP, if you don’t mind me asking, what community are you from that keeps this minhag?

amother

Lawngreen

Thu, Feb 11 2021, 1:42 pm

abbygiva wrote:

I never heard of this. OP, if you don’t mind me asking, what community are you from that keeps this minhag?

Our minhag is that the chason or kalla can't go out by themselves during sheva brachos, they need a shomer if they're alone. But they can go out together as a couple. I never heard that the couple together needs a shomer.

amother

Navy

Thu, Feb 11 2021, 1:44 pm

abbygiva wrote:

I never heard of this. OP, if you don’t mind me asking, what community are you from that keeps this minhag?

I’m
The one who originally said I never heard of this. It’s validating for me to not be the only one! I’m still wondering how we would’ve been able to get our lube on day 3 with a chaperone in tow!

DrMom

Thu, Feb 11 2021, 1:58 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Hmmm..

Parents shouldn't serve them breakfast at their own home.
They shouldn't send breakfast over to the hotel room.

(Mind you this is a city that doesn't have kosher bakeries and cafes on every corner.)

So what do you expect them to do?

Yes, there's a time for the couple to fend for themselves and get their own breakfast. That's the day after sheva brachos.

Ah, okay, the part about sending food makes a little more sense now. Thanks for providing that explanation.

amother

Jade

Thu, Feb 11 2021, 2:15 pm

abbygiva wrote:

I never heard of this. OP, if you don’t mind me asking, what community are you from that keeps this minhag?

Not OP, but I'm Chabad and this is our minhag. that chosson and kallah go nowhere without a shomer (even if they are going out together.)

stardream

Thu, Feb 11 2021, 6:35 pm

My mother sent us a breakfast basket to the hotel after we got married and we really appreciated it! In my community sending a breakfast basket to the hotel is standard. What you want to send also depends on how long they'll be staying at the hotel. If there's a chance they won't have an official lunch Friday or they'll be there for a few days it's really nice to send some healthy snack/foods like crackers, spreads, fruit, and nuts aside from cake and nosh. Milk/coffee/juice is also nice. A shabbos lamp like someone mentioned above is also really thoughtful!

amother

Bisque

Thu, Feb 11 2021, 6:44 pm

OP you sounds like an amazing mother and mother in law. Its so sweet of you to accommodate them like that.
Hotels usually have enough toiletries. I would send snacks and morning breakfast such as milk, croissants, fruit. Maybe a few books.

amother

Violet

Fri, Feb 12 2021, 12:15 am

amother [ Navy ] wrote:

You just reminded me: we definitely went to the drugstore during Sheba brachos. We needed lube! (Though that specific need aside I never knew that a couple shouldn’t go to a drugstore or something during Sheva brachos. I mean, it’s nice to be treated like a royal couple but it’s not a Halacha (like the week of shiva, is it?) that said, at my shabbos Sheva brachos in a hotel my parents gave us the same bag that all
The guests got (10 years ago BH so I don’t remember but likely water and chocolate, a schedule of the weekend.)

Okay, that is definitely NOT something I'd want my MIL to put in the hotel care package for me.

Milk, coffee, tea, snacks, cake, cookies, fruit, a board game or two, bagels. Nice towels that they can take home, or washcloths. I might appreciate hairbrush, toothbrush, toothpaste. If I forget mine then I have it and if not it'll wait till mine needs replacing.. If you are doing food though remember dishes, like cups for hot drinks/ mugs, plates, disposable cutlery, etc. The wipes to remove makeup are also a good idea and magazines/ books are as well.

OP you sound so thoughtful and caring, ignore the haters.