I'm a Chabad shlucha in a 3rd world country- AMA

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amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 3:03 am

amother [ Tuberose ] wrote:

You are awesome!

I’m also a Shlucha in a third world country (emerging economy. Smile

) Except it’s got a large Jewish community and we live quite nicely. So got beautiful schools for my kids restaurants etc...

Except it’s so so so so far from my family in the USA and that is a painful part of my life, always missing family Simchas.

Yes, it's one of the sad parts. Hatzlacha raba in your shlichus!

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 3:04 am

amother [ Junglegreen ] wrote:

No questions but you’re amazing. Kol hakavod. May you and your husband have continued strength and good health to be able to do your amazing work!!

Amen! Thank you for the bracha!

amother

Crimson

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 3:15 am

no questions at the moment, just want to give a bracha for lots of strength for your amazing and holy work!

Mayflower

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 3:26 am

Wow, you are amazing!

Do you have tourism (and frum tourists around)? Are the other frum jews who live there locals or expats? Are you close to any non-Jewish people around? How does the general population view Jews and Judaism?

Do you see yourself staying there for a long time or think you will move to a bigger community once the children get older?

Do you cook and bake everything from scratch or do you import food?

theoneandonly

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 7:30 am

Do you give birth where you live or come back to NY? Are you nervous about the lack of adequate healthcare?

sequoia

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 7:37 am

If it weren’t for “bodies on the streets” I’d think you were describing Ukraine!

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 9:40 am

amother [ Crimson ] wrote:

no questions at the moment, just want to give a bracha for lots of strength for your amazing and holy work!

Amen! Thank you!

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 9:54 am

Mayflower wrote:

We have some tourists, not a lot. Our city is not an attraction to tourists, but it's home to one of the 2 airports in the country, so a lot of tourists will come here for shabbos and then travel around the country.
One couple are expats, the rest are Israelis that intermarried and then became more observant and the non Jewish spouse converted to Judaism. There are many converts here, and many many people who think they converted but they didn't actually convert properly ("rabbis" often come and tell people they'll convert them with no preparation or commitment necessary, just pay the money, and they have them toivel in the ocean and think they are Jewish. It's a very big problem here) Many non jews here are curious about Judaism.
There is antisemitism everywhere including here, but nothing extreme.
BezH we hope to be able to stay here long term, but we'll see how it goes.
I mainly cook and bake from scratch. When travelers ask what they can bring we generally ask for cheese, or snacks for the kids, or candy to give out at kids programs, or non edible things that we need at the moment.

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 9:56 am

theoneandonly wrote:

Do you give birth where you live or come back to NY? Are you nervous about the lack of adequate healthcare?

So far I've given birth here, but it's always a hard decision. Next time I may travel to the US.

Yes it does make me nervous. By now we know to be cautious and always get a second opinion.

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 10:00 am

sequoia wrote:

If it weren’t for “bodies on the streets” I’d think you were describing Ukraine!

Interesting. I've never been to the Ukraine. Don't worry, there were only bodies on the streets in the beginning of Covid when the hospitals and cemeteries couldn't keep up with with the pace. Not at any other time since we've lived here.

amother

Clover

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 10:02 am

How many years are you there?
Are you living in an extreme climate?
How far is the nearest place with shluchim? Are there enough shluchim around to have a regional kinus every so often?

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 10:12 am

amother [ Clover ] wrote:

How many years are you there?
Are you living in an extreme climate?
How far is the nearest place with shluchim? Are there enough shluchim around to have a regional kinus every so often?

We've been here 3 years so far.
It's always hot here. Rains a lot for a few months of the year, and not at all the rest of the year.
The nearest shluchim are a 7 hour drive away. They are the only other family in our country.
So no regional kinus.

amother

Periwinkle

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 10:13 am

How do you get money (I don't know how other shluchim survive either.) ? Do you have lots of debt? Do you keep money in your country's banks or worry that they aren't stable?

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 10:54 am

amother [ Periwinkle ] wrote:

How do you get money (I don't know how other shluchim survive either.) ? Do you have lots of debt? Do you keep money in your country's banks or worry that they aren't stable?

BH we are extremely lucky. Our community really wants us to come and they pay us a decent salary (a lot of shluchim go out on their own and create a community) our community existed, just didn't have a rabbi, or anyone to provide a Jewish education and programming, and they really wanted it. So they are very supportive. The shul building was built by the community before we came here, and they included an apartment for the rabbi, so we live rent free as well. We are very lucky that we don't have to worry and to spend time fundraising.
We keep as much money as we need to live here in the bank and send whatever we can to an account in the US to save for future expenses.

doctorima

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 11:50 am

As someone who has visited many Chabad houses around the world, thank you for all your hard work and dedication. I know you mentioned that you don't get a lot of tourists in your location, but in general, do shluchim and shluchos appreciate frum non-Lubavitch visitors, or do you view them as a distraction to your primary focus on the local community?

In addition to offering to bring in Jewish amenities like kosher food (and generously donating to support your efforts - very important!), is there anything else you wish we knew when visiting or anything else you'd like us to offer to do to help?

familyfirst

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 2:03 pm

I’m going to pipe in and answer the question about liking when tourists come to visit-

As a shlucha, we usually love it! Tourists being a breath of fresh air, show appreciation and it’s always nice to meet new people.

The few occasions when we didn’t like it was when the guest came with a “s’kumt meer” entitled attitude. Like “you’re chabad and you chose to be here, so your job is to help me”. No appreciation, late calls on Friday afternoon for shabbos dinner (really? You couldn’t call before 2:00 Friday afternoon after I finished cooking?).

Thankfully, those incidents are few and far between and we love our tourist guests! You bring excitement and warmth to our shlichus and we really appreciate it!

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 6:57 pm

familyfirst wrote:

Thanks for responding! I couldn't have answered better. I agree with everything you wrote. We also often ask guests (if they offer to bring something) if we can ship a small package to their house to bring, so for that it's best if you let us know a few days before so the package can get to you. (Shipping to our country is very expensive, and there is a lot smaller variety available here than the US, so we always have curriculum material, supplies for crafts, etc. that we'd like to ask you to bring for our Hebrew school)
Most guests are polite and appreciative, and we and our kids love hosting them!

amother

Azalea

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 7:00 pm

How do you deal with couples that are in mixed marriages? Is that common where you are?

amother

Thu, Oct 07 2021, 8:39 pm

amother [ Azalea ] wrote:

How do you deal with couples that are in mixed marriages? Is that common where you are?

Yes, there are a number of couples in mixed marriages. Because of the issue of improper conversions we have to have a strict policy of no non-Jews allowed in shul or at official community functions. If we wouldn't have this policy we would have hundreds of non jews attending (not an exaggeration). The spouses know that they can't come, but they can come to an unofficial meal after shul, or if we invite them to our house for a meal, just come later and go straight to our house. They can also come to drop off or pick up their kids from Hebrew school.
I know a lot of other Chabad houses aren't as strict, since the issue with conversions isn't so rampant as it is here.

naturalmom5

Fri, Oct 08 2021, 12:28 am

You are the real deal
I am in awe of you
You are a role model for women to aspire to

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