What is right to do ?(also administrator threatens)

amother

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 4:25 pm

It’s complicated. Please please help me what to do or who to consult regarding this issue:

In beginning of year my kids got approved for essential worker funds totaling 5400 towards tuition. The school refused to get certified (they had to get approved) in order to accept this fund. I tried my best to pay tuition. 3months Inti the school year and school announced that building is sold therefore they will be closing their doors at the end of the year. I continued paying tuition. Then I couldn’t get my kids into another school because they claimed my kids are behind in education. The school really became a joke at this point. No HW until parents complained. Ext. come to it now it happened that I am behind tuition. I payed 2/3 of it and still owe 1/3.
I get phone call from administrators asking for money. I said I will try to cover balance but it will take longer and after school closed to bring it to zero. He decided that he will threaten me by saying that if I don’t pay it all he will call the other school and tell them not to accept my kids.
I was shocked. First they refused to help me get government help that I already did all work to get. Then they wait to tell us they will close down school ( if I knew earlier I would transfer them to school that would accept tuition funds without fuss). Then they didn’t help me find another school Now he threatened my kids future for his money.

I have no words. What can I do. What is right thing to do.
Please advise. Any one husband involved in Bais Din can guide me please

amother

Molasses

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 5:33 pm

notshanarishona wrote:

It’s not a school’s responsibility to get certified to accept grants or scholarships unless they told you they would do it. These kind of programs are a pain in the neck and not worth it for any school to do as one time thing

You may technically be right, but a school that truly cares about it's parent body would try to accept every grant possible. I know my son's school does, simply because they want to help the parents and ease our burdens, especially now when so many are struggling finacially.

If a school is not willing to go the extra mile for the parents, they should realize that that is how the parents will treat them back. Parents won't donate to any fundraisers, attend their dinners, or continue to donate once their children leave school. A school benefits when they treat the parents well, and the parents then feel goodwill towards them and want to reciprocate.

If a school really does not have the administrative capacity to enroll in these grants, they can ask the parent body if anyone can volunteer to deal with the paperwork.

amother

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 5:33 pm

Question is: if I was qualified to get 5400 in government funds towards tuition and school refused to get certified to accept the funds because they were closing but did not notify parents about school closing until 3months later. Am I still responsible to pay full tuition.

The school has also failed to provide proper services such as exposing young students to easy access to unfiltered internet on numerous occasions.

amother

Lightgreen

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 5:34 pm

amother [ Springgreen ] wrote:

You owe them tuition and you pay it. I don't understand what the question is.

She's working on it. She paid 2/3. Not zero. Unfortunately most of us don't have money trees in our backyards. We try to pay tuition but pesky things like rent, electricity, diapers and food sometimes need to come first.

Bullying administrators don't make it easier to pay tuition.

amother

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 5:38 pm

amother [ Lightgreen ] wrote:

Thankyou for these words. I did mention that I am struggling at this time including an emergency medical treatment and he laughed saying I am sure you had money for that. My parents paying for my med treatment that’s necessary. I really can’t get over how rude he was.

notshanarishona

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 6:00 pm

amother [ Molasses ] wrote:

It’s not so simple, if it costs a school $1500 in labor to receive a scholarship for $5000 it’s really not worth the headache for an institution.
I started working with scholarships for swimming lessons, and I ended up having to hire a secretary to deal with the paperwork but meanwhile everyone complains if I charge more money for the people on scholarships. It’s not simple as just being nice, it’s a big deal both in time and money.

amother

Chestnut

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 6:35 pm

Based on what you are saying it sounds like the school administration has a lot of issues. And if so the administration from other schools will know that and will take whatever they say with a grain of salt. So I doubt he can prevent you from getting accepted from other schools. But it would be best to find someone influential in your community who will know more and can help you figure out your next step.

amother

Peony

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 6:49 pm

I don’t understand. How did you get the essential worker scholarship in the first place if your school didn’t qualify? I couldn’t even complete the application because my child’s school wasn’t approved for it.

In any case there are two separate issues here.

1) Tuition- You’re annoyed that the school didn’t do the work to qualify for your scholarship money. It is upsetting that that didn’t work out. I was annoyed at my child’s school for not qualifying either. But you still owe them the tuition.

2) Your grievances against the school- I don’t know all the details but it sounds like they dropped the ball with the closing of the school and the education wasn’t up to par. You’re also upset at the rude way the administration treated you. It’s absolutely disgusting for the administrator to tell you what he did. Sadly, this doesn’t absolve your tuition obligation.

I would come up with a specific payment plan- maybe give them postdated checks. I know it’s hard. And then breathe a sigh of relief that you don’t have to deal with them after this year.

amother

Banana

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 8:40 pm

Can't answer for your tuition.... but really feel so sorry for you that you had to deal with this guy. It's so tough to deal with such people. Really hurtful and harsh...

Honestly when I need to deal with whako like that I try to get my husband to call. He doesn't take it so to heart as I do. I know it's immature, but I like to chicken out of some adult responsibilities lol.

amother

Garnet

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 9:22 pm

Sounds like a tough situation, I'm sorry.
However, I'm pretty sure a beis din would side with the school.
In our community all the Jewish schools have an agreement under the guidance of the Jewish Federation that no school is allowed to accept a student from another school until all outstanding tuition has been paid. I have personally been involved in such a case (as the part of administration of the new school someone was trying to apply to) and there is no way around it.

amother

Lightgreen

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 9:51 pm

amother [ Garnet ] wrote:

So what do parents in your community do when they literally don't have money?

I know that we like to talk about the parents that prioritize their live-in help and Pesach hotels over tuition, but the vast majority of parents who aren't paying tuition are just not making ends meet. Without Doonas, diamond bracelets, or vacations.

amother

Garnet

Thu, Jun 09 2022, 10:29 pm

Quote:

So what do parents in your community do when they literally don't have money?

What does that have to do with the new school?

That has to be taken care of with the old school. Either she needs to figure out a payment plan or she needs to appeal to them for more financial aid. But the fact that she's switching to a new school doesn't mean she now doesn't need to pay the old school whatever she agreed to pay them