Are you fasting today?

amother

Hydrangea

Sun, Aug 07 2022, 7:08 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Sometimes people just like to name call here.
Don’t take it personally.

And I am kinda getting dizzy from thinking of the pregnant fasters here 🤯

I asked years ago. My rabbi (MO) told me I had to do Yom Kippur and Tisha B'Av. My frum mom thinks I'm crazy. Right now, starting to wonder. And yeah, dizzy. Just glad DH took over bedtime. I never fasted well.

amother

Hyssop

Sun, Aug 07 2022, 7:14 pm

amother [ Iris ] wrote:

This exactly. Tisha b'av is not negotiable unless of course you can't fast for some reason. I've fasted many times while pregnant or nursing while caring for little ones all day, it's hard but when you know it's not optional you just do it. Of course not everyone can & that's fine ( 1 time I broke my fast, guilt free because I really needed to), but I don't like the attitude I'm seeing in recent years of " I don't must fast, hurray! I'll break my fast regardless of how I feel"

I really think that people whose bodies are stronger and whose physical makeup can handle a fast, have no concept of what it is like for other people. I ended up in the hospital one Yom Kippur because I was nursing and taking care of my 18 month old and I really have no medical issues at all, I just can't handle fasting well. Yom Kippur is the only fast I do all the way, this year Tisha bav I'm having my easiest pregnancy so far so I went til Chatzos. But really you can't understand unless you've been there. It's not a matter of being hard and just pushing through, it's just not.

amother

Yolk

Sun, Aug 07 2022, 7:20 pm

amother [ Iris ] wrote:

Optional is a funny word for getting a heter.

amother

Babyblue

Sun, Aug 07 2022, 7:33 pm

Yes. I'm still nursing my one year old, but he eats many solids also. My LOR said I should nurse as usual and attempt fasting, and only break fast if I began to feel substantially worse than how I typically feel on a fast day when not nursing. We are MO.

amother

Iris

Sun, Aug 07 2022, 8:51 pm

amother [ Hyssop ] wrote:

Of course. I wrote unless you can't for some reason, you obviously can't fast.

Re getting a heter, all's well if you ask because you believe you can't fast as opposed to just not wanting to. Like the poster ( different thread) with an 18 month old toddler who eats tons of food but also nurses, she broke her fast because she was told she can even though she felt just fine.

BrisketBoss

Sun, Aug 07 2022, 9:00 pm

amother [ Iris ] wrote:

Her rav told her not to fast as I recall, so what's the problem? Do we now not listen to our rav? Nursing is a concern in Judaism, even with an older kid. 2 years is pretty much the expected minimum for nursing. And it was 10av today, not 9av, so that matters too. Obviously different people hold different ways. I hope you feel secure in what you did today, not resentful that she suffered less, or whatever.

amother

Azalea

Sun, Aug 07 2022, 9:14 pm

amother [ Hyssop ] wrote:

I agree until my 4th child starred fasting. She made it through today (with a lot of sleeping!) but often needs to break her fast. Spend very little time in shul on YK.

amother

Seashell

Sun, Aug 07 2022, 9:37 pm

amother [ Iris ] wrote:

My rav said that a pregnant woman should not fast on a nidche. He told me not even to start the fast even if I feel fine, it’s a nidche and it’s not as ‘important’ as it is on a regular year.
It was a relief for me to get such a clear answer, I’m 32 weeks pregnant and although I’m an ok faster I’ve no idea how my pregnant body will react to fasting and don’t want to take chances and go into preterm labor at this point.

amother

Hawthorn

Sun, Aug 07 2022, 10:01 pm

I'm nursing an 18 month old who eats solids but is super picky and relies on nursing a lot. I didn't think to ask as I am a good faster generally. It's interesting to note how it must be how you as the question as to whether you get a heter to fast or not.
I fasted all day with 18 month old nursing a lot
My sister with 12 month old got herself heter not to fast at all even though baby eats tons of solids.
My sister with 1 month newborn was told she needs to fast no heter
My sister who had baby yesterday was told if she has the baby obviously no fasting but if not she should start and go as long as she can.
Sister in law didn't fast cuz she says she is a " bad_ faster. Youngest is 3...

amother

Antiquewhite

Sun, Aug 07 2022, 10:02 pm

amother [ Hawthorn ] wrote:

We’re the Shailas asked of the same rabbi?