If you serve only challah, dips, and cholent for lunch

amother

Lightyellow

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:10 am

LovesHashem wrote:

Wow. Are we really forcing people to eat now?

Listen if someone is picky and has a huge list of things they won't eat, I hear. But having only one dish basically (cholent) is so wrong and socially off. Would you invite someone for a weekday dinner and just serve chicken with no side dishes or anything?

Cholent is a one-pot meal with carbs (potatoes, barley) and protein (meat, beans). It's more akin to serving chicken and rice (cooked together).

I do think that there should also be some form of vegetables along with it but I don't see serving just cholent to be equivalent to serving just chicken.

And yes, if you invite someone for dinner and serve chicken and rice and they don't like it, it's an uncomfortable situation. But I wonder how common it is to serve multiple options just in case. If you were inviting someone for dinner, would you serve chicken and rice AND meatballs and spaghetti, just in case?

NechaMom

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:12 am

I’ve never been to a meal where they served just challah dips and cholent.
Op you are right. It’s stingy. Don’t invite guest if you can’t serve them a bit more than that. Or give them a heads up to fill up on challah.

amother

Orange

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:18 am

Cholent is not like eating chicken or meat and potatoes and barley and beans. It's one big mush and not so appetizing to look at. I don't mind cholent and I make one every week but I eat it maybe twice a year.
Women and girls at my table always skip the cholent, the men and boys dig in. Therefore I make sure to have another type of fleishigs for those who are makpid to eat meat on shabbos but don't want cholent, and one or two types of kugel.

LovesHashem

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:22 am

amother Lightyellow wrote:

Its one pot but it's the same taste. It's like making chicken in the rice. I would have chicken and rice seperate plus a veggie dish.

IMHO cholent looks and smells like throw up. It's a one pot meal that's cooked for so long it's looks like a huge mush and it's all disintegrated and gross. Even if I liked one part like chicken or potatoes usually by shabbos day it's all one mush to the point you can't even pick something out like that (unless it's a huge chunk of meat)

amother

Plum

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:23 am

writinggirl wrote:

This belongs in a separate thread, but I would also appreciate if guests would always let me know if they have any dietary restrictions. I understand that they don’t want to inconvenience me, but I am happy to make sure there are foods at the table they could eat. One shabbos, my sister and a friend came for a meal. I didn’t know her friend was gluten free until she showed up at my house 20 minutes before shabbos to drop off special challah. I was so upset. I had worked so hard and made dishes like chicken wrapped in puff pastry and mini apple cherry crisps, while really it would have been easy to make plain grilled chicken instead and a kugel without gluten so she could have had options. I had even planned a salad with a crunch made from breadcrumbs… It was so hard to watch her unable to eat anything and took a lot of the pleasure out of being the hostess.

This. A thousand times. I always ask guests if there's anything they can't or don't eat. You are not sparing me trouble by not telling.me about your food restrictions. You are causing me embarrassment and sadness by putting me in the position of not having food for a guest. I don't want you to leave hungry.

shabbatiscoming

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:29 am

LovesHashem wrote:

Wow, your opinion is, in my opinion, just a it extreme.
If you dont like it, dont eat it. So mwny men and women LOVE chulent.
So many look forward to shabbat day chulent.
And again, maybe your chulent is gross. My mother's chulrnt was never so mushed that you couldnt find delicious pirces of potato and chicken in it.
Its also just a bit childish the way you were describing food.

Ema of 5

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:32 am

amother Peony wrote:

In my circles it's the norm to serve just cholent as the main. And I haven't met anyone who doesn't eat cholent.

I'm happy this is the way it is, because otherwise I would never be able to have guests.

I had guests Shabbos morn and this is what I served:
challah
dips
egg
liver
salad
cold cuts
cholent

And this is considered a perfectly respectable menu in my parts. Even if I would omitted the liver it would have fine as well.

I don’t eat cholent, and neither do my husband or kids. We make it solely for our guests.

Last edited by Ema of 5 on Sun, May 07 2023, 12:08 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Black

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:34 am

amother OP wrote:

I’m wondering if people are not taking me literally. You just rattled off any more things than what I mentioned repeatedly in this thread. You said chopped liver, eggs, and two fresh salads. That is way more than what I am talking about here.

So when you said challa and dips, what were you referring to?
chopped liver, eggs and salad is to eat with the challa. We happen to prefer these to all sorts of dips and salatim.
then there is cholent.

That's all.
That's what you were complaining about. No?

Ema of 5

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:34 am

amother Hunter wrote:

Is it an ashkenaz thing to only serve one dish? Never heard of that in my life or seen it before bh...
We make salatim and challah with an appetizer (fish, or borekas or a chicken patee dish I make), main course is dafina with chicken and potatoes and rice of some sort or london broil etc

Salatim are usually the basic 8 I do more most weeks since my husband likes it: chumus, tachina, chatzilim, homemade pickles, matbucha, cole slaw, corn salad, moroccan carrots, beet salad...

I don’t know anyone who only serves cholent. Never heard of it until this thread.
What is dafina?

Ema of 5

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:35 am

amother Burntblack wrote:

Do you leave the challah, dips, etc on the table when the cholent comes out? That woukd make this workable for me and make total sense in my world, even if it's not what I'm used to. Someone doesn't eat the chulent? Deli sandwich, or more challah and dips.

What if someone can’t have gluten or nitrates? Dips are really not enough for a meal.

amother

Black

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:36 am

LovesHashem wrote:

I guess my cholent and yours have nothing in common.
My kids like different bits of the cholent so I make sure you can find different things in the pot. The chicken is big, whole pieces, the potatoes are nice size cubes, the beans are in one place on their own and the barley is separate. Absolutely not disintegrated or mushy.

amother

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:39 am

amother Black wrote:

Where in any of my comments did I mention eggs, salad, and chopped liver? I’m not sure where that came from.

Challah. Chummus, babagenush, jalapeño, or red pepper dip. Onion mayo dip.

No salads. No protein based item (ie no eggs or liver) until the cholent.

Then cholent. Then bentching.

No deli, no nothing that I did not literally mention.

You and others read your own preferences into my posts. I literally said dips and NOT salads.

amother

Burntblack

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:43 am

Ema of 5 wrote:

What if someone can’t have gluten or nitrates? Dips are really not enough for a meal.

I would expect someone who can't eat gluten to tell me in advance. Nitrates, probably not.

Realistically, I wouldn't do this. I serve chicken along with my chulent, and we have gluten free family members so there is always rice or potatoes, etc- my chulent is also gluten free. And I have picky eaters, so I would never serve a one pot meal to guests. But if this is what someone is going to serve, my feedback is that leaving everything out the whole meal makes it workable for most people.

amother

Black

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:46 am

amother OP wrote:

That's just a matter of semantics.
My kids call egg salad a dip.
You didn't specify what you meant by dips.
So I'm not sure why you're getting annoyed when people interpret it more widely than you intended.
I don't think adding a green salad to the menu you were frustrated about would really make you feel, wow, I got a full meal.
You want more than that.

And I didn't say anything about deli either.

If you read the posts here where people talk about challa and dips for a first course, they mean like ten or twenty different dips and what they call "salatim". That could legit be a real course.

Most people don't serve just challa, chummus plus whatever you said and then cholent. If they are making dips for a first course, they go the whole way.

LovesHashem

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:47 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

I've been to many families and this is just my opinion. My husband loves cholent, and I enjoy some cholents (depending on what sin it) friday night after it's only been cooking for 3-4 hours and resembles a soup or a stew.

shabbatiscoming

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:54 am

LovesHashem wrote:

I dont know anyone who eats chulent friday night.

amother

Sun, May 07 2023, 10:54 am

amother Black wrote:

I just reread my OP to see if I left things up to semantics. I really don’t think I did. I literally said I was talking about dips and not salads. Ie, none of the salatim.

I mentioned deli because somebody else commented that they serve exactly what I mentioned, but that listed liver, eggs, and deli.

So like you said, most people don’t serve just what I said. If this was “going the whole way” with the first course, there would not be an issue and no reason to post.

LovesHashem

Sun, May 07 2023, 11:03 am

shabbatiscoming wrote:

I dont know anyone who eats chulent friday night.

Have you met a yeshivish yeshiva bochur ever? It's practically a chiyuv. Okay I'm exaggerating but it's totally a thing. It's done a few hours after the meal, usually during winter shabbosim.

I married into a family of boys so when I'm by my in laws it's standard in the winter for them all to have a cholent feast at 10pm.When we've hosted bochurim my husband offers them as well.

Bnei Berak 10

Sun, May 07 2023, 11:05 am

amother Black wrote:

This
I've been told many edot hamizrach separate the content of the pot. Looks so much more neat when serving