Cooking erev yom tov -Would this be considered normal

amother

Khaki

Fri, Oct 06 2023, 6:18 pm

amother Mulberry wrote:

OP, do you have any idea of a possible reason for her behavior? I actually have a family member that doesn't cook at all. No pasta, no toast, nothing....and she has severe OCD. That's her reason. It's all too much for her.

So interesting. I have OCD and it especially comes up with eating food made by someone else (takeout!) or eating uncooked food.

amother

Caramel

Sun, Oct 08 2023, 4:30 pm

Lots of freezer space is my trick. I make in advance things I can freeze. The only things I really like to make fresh are my meats because then I freeze the leftovers.
Challos-I make in advance and freeze. Also I only make every other week, not every week.
Desserts and cakes also get made in advance and frozen (or dessert is bought icecream)
Sides such as kugels are also made in advance and frozen
On the day or the night before is when I make my meats and chicken. I try and prep them the day before so it's in my fridge and all I have to do is put it in my oven.

I also try not to leave both cooking and cleaning for the same day. So the day before I might focus on making sure the house is straight, and then the next day will be more cooking, or vice versa.

Busybee5

Sun, Oct 08 2023, 5:11 pm

amother OP wrote:

Thank thank all. I’m just truly curious. What does your erev yom tov look like. Marathon cooking? Do you buy out? My kids were underfoot and I was relatively patient. But I do wonder what other homes are like now? Its exhausting for me.

I do a bit at a time, I don't leave it all for erev. I just can't do it all, plus look after the kids, bath them, clean the house etc etc.
So I had a list of what I had to still make for second days, and every day of chol hamoed I made at least one of those things on the list.
It's amazing what you got done, you must be exhausted.
And I do also buy some ready cooked food when I need to. Absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Hugs to you.

rainbow dash

Sun, Oct 08 2023, 6:15 pm

amother OP wrote:

So all of you that are saying I am heroic (lol but thank you!) you make similar but froze? You bought out? What exactly did you do to make food?

I went shopping Wednesday and Thursday day I cooked everything. Challah we buy.
I make salmon, buy Gefillta fish, made Dips, soup, chicken, meat, kugels, rice side.

We had 2 days so it was alot. Also Friday all I had to do was fish.

Ate out one meal.

Your doing great.

amother

Sapphire

Sun, Oct 08 2023, 9:50 pm

That sounds like a lot! I try to have some foods in the freezer in advance to keep it more manageable for me, I don't think I could do what you did. I started off with meat challah and muffins already made in the freezer so that was helpful for me. Sometimes I have even more premade. I still wait till the night before or erev yt to do everything else so it's still a lot Wink

amother

Brass

Sun, Oct 08 2023, 10:39 pm

amother Zinnia wrote:

My mom also didn't cook. We had take out a lot, or box Mac and cheese with canned vegetables a lot. Or frozen food. She cooked real for maybe once every few weeks maybe.

I learned to cook from a young age and often cooked stuff for myself. My mom actually started cooking more when she retired. I don't think it was dysfunction for us. Not every woman cooks. Her mother also didn't cook. My grandfather was the cook in their family . I think my mom is still pretty amazing.

I don’t think not cooking on its own is dysfunctional, as long as there is food to eat for the family.

amother

Pistachio

Sun, Oct 08 2023, 10:55 pm

I grew up with my mother cooking everything on erev yt. It was always a frenetic, frenzied day and we all helped and worked literally up to the zman for her to finish all the extras on her menu.
Now I rebelled lol. Got myself a big freezer, I cook slowly in the weeks leading up to yt and freeze whatever I can. If I know I want stuffed chicken for a meal, I'll make stuffed chicken 2 weeks before yt as a supper and just prep an extra few and put in freezer raw. I bake double batches of challah so I don't have to bake more than every couple months. Erev yt all I do is the fish and whatever else can't be frozen. I make a menu and defrost whatever I need the day before so I can bake it. My brain is allergic to pressure so this is the way I can get to yt with the least stress possible. I use lists, lists, lists and love checking things off.

Amelia Bedelia

Sun, Oct 08 2023, 11:23 pm

amother OP wrote:

Dysfunctional childhood mom here.

I never had a proper yom tov as a kid - so I have no clue what is standard. My mom never ever cooked - everything was store bought. I have a handful of kids ages 8- 16.

I did shopping last night. Today I started working at 7am and now at 2pm just finished and made:
Challa
salmon
chicken soup
kneidlach
2 broccoli quiche
peanut chews
brisket
hot poppers
potato kugel
deli roll
cholent
2 trays roasted veggies

tuna and eggsalad

To me this is heroic but I wonder if all my neighbors / friends / fellow imamothers have the same type of stuff. Am I just average but since I grew up with never ever having a home cooked meal this is more than the average.

Do most women make challa every week (I started now)

Curious as to what people think.
And is it the norm that if you do not cook/freeze in advance then today it took me so many hours to prepare for second days?

When my kids were little I got away with much easier menus. Now I need at least what I prepared to get through.

Curious what the norm is

This is amazing! But if I would have to cook all that in one day, I would buy the challah and peanut chews.

Just curious, was all this supposed to be for both days? Besides the chulent, you only had one main. Did you cook more on Yom tov?