S/o thinking your in a better financial state than most

amother

Honeysuckle

Tue, Dec 05 2023, 10:47 am

Dollars & cents are meaningless, all that matters if if you can cover your expenses, have a bit of extras & what is left over.

How can you compare with others bases on income?

cnc

Tue, Dec 05 2023, 10:51 am

amother Beige wrote:

I’m 28 and know I’m in better state than most people. My husband and I make 500k combined. I know most people dont make that much especially at our ages. We’re in the top wealth percentage of USA. And I will not be responding to what we do.
And no we don’t come from money.

Frum finances are completely different than finances across the rest of the the US.
Many many frum people make way above the median salary and still can’t cover their cost of living.

amother

Tue, Dec 05 2023, 11:08 am

cnc wrote:

Frum finances are completely different than finances across the rest of the the US.
Many many frum people make way above the median salary and still can’t cover their cost of living.

I agree. Based on an American salary we make a lot but for the Jewish life we spend way more.

Genius

Tue, Dec 05 2023, 11:34 am

cnc wrote:

Frum finances are completely different than finances across the rest of the the US.
Many many frum people make way above the median salary and still can’t cover their cost of living.

500k is still way above average whichever way you spin it.

amother

Hunter

Tue, Dec 05 2023, 11:48 am

Me and my husband combined make 1m a yr bh. Idk what our friends make but I think that's pretty impressive. Especially since when we got married we had less then 5k and no jobs (and parents have no money either) We're in our 20s.
I think our friends would assume about us that we're not making that much based off how we live but we like it that way Wink

amother

Mimosa

Tue, Dec 05 2023, 11:53 am

We don’t have money to buy groceries.

I’d still choose this over being supported by parents. Along with money comes control. Nothing anyone says will change my mind.

amother

Bluebonnet

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 2:29 am

This is not something I think about but I want to bring another perspective.
We both work hard, more than full time. We don't particularly earn a lot by frum standards.
But we spend responsibly, are able to save each month, have never had debt, and own our home.

There's so much more to thinking you're in a better position than your friends and neighbors than actual income. If someone earns very well, they can still be in a worse position than their neighbors with a much smaller income.

There's no point in comparing.

amother

Watermelon

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 6:47 am

This doesn't really add to the conversation but seeing some salaries here seem to really afirm that Hashem's ability to provide is endless and the world is plentiful. I really need to start asking Hashem for more, nicely. Not sure why some of us had more luck than others. I don't think it is always based on work ethic or career path. Please Hashem shower all of us with all the money we need.

amother

Aster

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 7:44 am

We have 4 kids, low thirties and make combined about 400k. Dh makes the bulk of it.
I think people guess we make half that, we’re not into “frum spending” so we look poor. But we do spend on other stuff like vacations, so whoever is watching is probably confused lol.

amother

Pansy

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 7:52 am

amother Smokey wrote:

we got another poster who wrote she earned 900K this year!

Go ladies

I assume it’s the same one? Bh.

I assume she owns a business or does something like super high end service business.

amother

Cantaloupe

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 7:54 am

amother Pansy wrote:

I assume it’s the same one? Bh.

I assume she owns a business or does something like super high end service business.

No idea if it's me, LOL. Yes, I own a service based business and have employees.

amother

Pumpkin

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 8:04 am

amother Mimosa wrote:

We don’t have money to buy groceries.

I’d still choose this over being supported by parents. Along with money comes control. Nothing anyone says will change my mind.

Umm no, that’s with unhealthy relationships
We were supported when we first got married, and there was zero mind control or strings attached
We bh have healthy and loving parents. That’s all it takes

amother

Snowflake

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 8:33 am

amother Cantaloupe wrote:

The other post was just so unrelatable, and her arrogance was kind of shocking for someone with zero education, skills, and work experience. Yes, I think I'm doing financially better than a lot of people, but I earned upwards of 900k this year. Not a lot of people make this kind of money, and I'm 39. The OP of that thread seemed like an entitled child who is living off her relatives. When she earns something of her own, she can be prideful and until then, good luck with all that borrowed arrogance...

What makes you think she's the one who is arrogant and you're not? Yes, my money comes from my parents, but really my money comes from Hashem, same as yours. Do you really think you're a better person because you make so much money a year? Do you really think it's ok to be prideful because you're making 900k a year? Do you really believe its YOU, because you're so smart, so hard working, had the foresight to get an education (if you did)? Your attitude is a bit nauseating to be honest.

amother

Snowflake

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 8:36 am

amother Mimosa wrote:

We don’t have money to buy groceries.

I’d still choose this over being supported by parents. Along with money comes control. Nothing anyone says will change my mind.

I see this attitude a lot on ima and I don't understand it. I don't really see this that much IRL , maybe people are just not saying it out loud (many of the people I know get some sort of help from their parents over the years, and everyone I speak to seems very grateful).

amother

Sienna

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 9:09 am

amother Pumpkin wrote:

Same.

If a loving parent of adult children has lots of extra money, what exactly are they supposed to do with it? They already have fancy cars/vacations/give lots of Tzedakah etc. and still have more to give BH. So they should just give the rest to Tzedakah while their own kids can't buy groceries? 🤔

amother

Teal

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 9:17 am

amother Snowflake wrote:

Maybe that's because you have emotionally healthy parents who don't manipulate you or try to control you if they help you out.

amother

Moonstone

Wed, Dec 06 2023, 9:19 am

amother Sienna wrote:

Gonna agree with this. Bh my parents are well off and have evrrything they need and more. They helped us buy our house and we’re paying them back as we can. I’m forever grateful