S/O I am not a woman, why is it not okay...

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amother

Camellia

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 9:00 am

amother Wandflower wrote:

I get shamed the other way. The ladies always assume I want a minimizer and give me a lot of issues and make mean comments too. Have yet to have a good experience anywhere.

Have you been to Nordstrom? The one or 2 I've been to, I've always had a great fitting experience. They do a great job and are very professional.
The one time I went to a frum place they did a terrible fitting job. I have a large cup size, and I doubt these places carry these sizes. They just kept upping my band size till the bra "fit" and sold me a really ill-fitting bra. Sometime after someone took me to Nordstrom and the discrepancy between what I had been sold and my actual size was ridiculous. They also taught me how to tell if a bra fits properly.

amother

Beige

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 9:41 am

It's not ok, the same way fat shaming is not ok but people do it anyway.

notshanarishona

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 10:58 am

Neither is okay, both are done all over .
Some aquatics makers don’t make plus size lifeguarding gear which is a big issue, the poor lifeguards who have to make a special uniform order from a different provider get so self conscious with wearing something different.

amother

Antiquewhite

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 11:12 am

I am a very thin person naturally and also very small on top (barely an a cup)
I was at a local frum clothing store trying on dresses and a lot dont fit me right bec I cant carry the cut with a small top - anyhow the saleslady was yelling at me that I look crazy because I need a minimizer!!! Rolling Eyes

she was so loud and I was so embarrassed bec im so small and its something im insecure about
listen people are obnoxious sometimes

my in law family struggles with weight and they make comments allll the time with everything I eat and the way I look etc. it makes me so uncomfortable. like I would never comment on your eating habits or weigh.. just bec im thin doesnt mean you should comment on mine.

thank you op.

amother

Wed, Jan 10 2024, 5:57 pm

amother Antiquewhite wrote:

Same here. My husband`s family are larger and eat more and my mother in law always used to comment that I eat like a bird until I asked her to please refrain from commenting.

amother

Wed, Jan 10 2024, 5:59 pm

amother Phlox wrote:

You’re right. But I was excluded from an exercise group I wanted to join because I was too thin and apparently that was going to make the other members feel bad. And the clincher is that I was only that thin because I was going through a terrible time and couldn’t eat normally.

Exercise isn`t just to lose weight, it`s for staying fit too. If you are happy to pay to join, they shouldn`t discriminate just because they think you are not overweight enough. Who gets to decide from what size can join the group?!

amother

Wed, Jan 10 2024, 6:01 pm

amother Caramel wrote:

I think she’s using underwear to mean bra.

And unfortunately our society fat shames all the time.

yes sorry I used the word underwear instead of bra.

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