Helping daughter get organized

amother

Thu, Jan 11 2024, 8:34 pm

My daughter is 13, in 7th grade. She is beyond disorganized. Her backpack and books are ok, but she herself would leave her head somewhere if it weren't attached to her body. She's always forgetting her books in school, forgetting about assignments/tests. It's the first year that it's departmental and she's very overwhelmed with so many teachers and classes, etc...

She has a notebook to write it all down, but she forgets to write it or to check it before she leave school. How do I help her?

teachkids

Thu, Jan 11 2024, 8:40 pm

The term your looking for is "executive functioning". See if the school has anyone to help her with it, or OTs do it, or you can buy workbooks to do with her at home if you have the right relationship.

amother

Thu, Jan 11 2024, 9:04 pm

teachkids wrote:

What type of workbooks?

amother

Oatmeal

Thu, Jan 11 2024, 9:50 pm

My daughter was like this in 8th grade. Thank goodness she got much better over the next few yrs. It was actually quite difficult for me since I am super organized type. I spoke with a Social worker that deals with this. The hardest part was letting her pay the price for her disorganization rather than pick up the pieces and fix everything for her which was so tempting for me (ex: if she left her book in school or missed her bus she had to figure out for herself how to fix it without my help) On her own, she now leaves herself note reminders, is in touch with friends in the neighborhoods who's bus stop is later etc...and she gets throught day to day life her own way but is fully functional.

amother

Thu, Jan 11 2024, 11:25 pm

I would love to let her figure it out on her own, but she'll prob flunk oir of school if I do. I need her to hand in her assignments and pass all her exams.

teachkids

Fri, Jan 12 2024, 12:07 am

amother OP wrote:

What type of workbooks?

Honestly this is totally not my field, the school I work in has a staff member who works with these kids. But basically if you search "executive functioning workbooks for kids" you'll find some. The idea is to exercise that "muscle" in a low pressure setting and/or preplan strategies to help

amother

Sage

Sat, Jan 13 2024, 10:44 pm

Also read up on ADHD and consider if it's worth getting her evaluated. My son was not diagnosed until close to the end of high school because he was smart enough to compensate in many ways. But he always had executive function issues and I feel bad that I missed diagnosing him (and helping him medically) earlier. In retrospect the lack of organization and inability to stay on top of assignments/classes were screaming symptoms.

amother

Broom

Sat, Jan 13 2024, 10:55 pm

amother Sage wrote:

How does medicine help executive functioning issues?

amother

Cerulean

Sat, Jan 13 2024, 11:51 pm

amother Broom wrote:

How does medicine help executive functioning issues?

Adhd brains are literally not lit up in that department.