13 year old bedtime?

amother

Blonde

Mon, Feb 12 2024, 9:56 pm

Depends on your son's unique sleep needs and what time he needs to be up in the morning. I want my 13yo son in bed at 9:30, but it doesn't always happen. I do suspect my son needs more sleep than most his age, though.

amother

Aqua

Mon, Feb 12 2024, 10:06 pm

I'll be the odd one out. Lol mine goes to bed at about 8:30 and gets up at 5:30-6:00. His bus comes at 6:40 and he enjoys quiet time alone in the morning.of he goes to be any later he acts crazy and can't get up in the morning.
He is not a night person.lol

mha3484

Mon, Feb 12 2024, 10:12 pm

10-10:30. Hes not usually home from masmidim until close to 9. And he needs to shower, eat more, unwind a little.

amother

Blonde

Mon, Feb 12 2024, 10:37 pm

amother Aqua wrote:

Considering the fact your son gets up at 5:30am (ouch!), I don't think you're the odd one out. That's a very early start. My son wakes up at 6:35am and if he went to sleep after 9:30pm the previous night, then he's exhausted in the morning.

amother

Feverfew

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 4:14 am

My DD 13 is in bed at 10 - falls asleep right away.
I wake her at 6:50 - she's up by about 7.

She should probably be in bed earlier, but she's the youngest and the whole house is up and about.
On shabbat, now in the winter, she easily sleeps 11 hours (10pm - 9am) if she doesn't get up for shul.

up high

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 4:48 am

My 13 year old son, I try to get to bed (9:00ish) so that by 9:30/10:00 he should sleep. He likes to listen to hotlines He is up 6:35, and like to take it ez until his bus comes at 7:15.
Whatever works for you/him is normal.
Early to bed, early to rise is healthy wealthy wise.
(If my son is tired, he'll even go into bed 8:30).

Last edited by up high on Tue, Feb 13 2024, 7:58 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

Impatiens

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 6:09 am

My 14 year old son goes to bed around 10 and needs to be up 6:45, he struggles to wake up no matter what time he goes to sleep.

amother

cornflower

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 8:23 am

My 13 year old no longer has an official bed time, but we have a no screens past 8 rule, and he does have to be upstairs by 10. He likes to shower right before bed, so he gets in the shower around 9:50/10 and goes right to his room as soon as he's done. He doesn't necessarily go right to sleep, sometimes he reads in bed. I've never seen him up past 11 on a weeknight and he gets up ok (with some grumbling) so I don't make a big deal of it.

amother

Moccasin

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 8:42 am

amother Aqua wrote:

I always thought that we are the only ones. Our son has the same schedule as your son. He goes to sleep immediately after Marriv. He gets up early, he has time to relax and eat breakfast. By the time he goes out he is ready to learn well.

REMEMBER Early to bed early to rise makes you healthy, wealthy and wise.

amother

Magnolia

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 9:39 am

At this age, you need to take maariv into calculation.
Sure, now they can daven early.
But by May, they can't daven before 8:30/8:45. Then they come home, unwind, eat, shower.

amother

Amethyst

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 9:46 am

So funny. A few months ago there was a similar thread and everyone was saying once they are teens you can't give them bedtimes and it's normal for them to be up till 11 or later.

amother

Poinsettia

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 10:07 am

My son is now 14. He usually goes to bed around 11.

But last year he learned over the phone for about 10 minutes with my son in 12th grade. He had to wait for night seder to be over in my other son's mesivta--they only learned at 10/10:30. So he didn't go to sleep until after.

amother

Poinsettia

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 10:08 am

Quote:

Once they hit bar mitzvah it's not so simple to eat before minyan.

Sewsew_mom

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 10:09 am

I cannot get my son to go to bed before 10:30-11. Most nights it's even later than 11. It's so crazy. They are so tired. He gets up 6:30am. He's not even 14 yet.

amother

Begonia

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 11:44 am

10/10:30 is what’s realistic for us.
Where we live boys friends are invited to bar mitzvahs so anytime he attends one he doesn’t even get home until 10.

mha3484

Tue, Feb 13 2024, 11:50 am

amother Begonia wrote:

10/10:30 is what’s realistic for us.
Where we live boys friends are invited to bar mitzvahs so anytime he attends one he doesn’t even get home until 10.

Same but the recent ones that went that late had parents very upset. Most of the ones my son has been invited to are 6:30-8:30 or similar. I find the bigger challenge is maariv and learning programs.