Straight out of the shower look

amother

Seagreen

Thu, Feb 29 2024, 8:45 pm

kugelEater wrote:

It's krumkeit, not frumkeit. The fear is that men will see your wet hair and imagine you in the shower... Puke

That’s ridiculous! It’s not tznius because it is attracting attention. We want our shaitels to be attractive, not attracting.
I’m so sorry for you that you were taught such horrible things about the beautiful mitzvah of tznius.

amother

Melon

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 1:31 am

amother OP wrote:

No, hashem did not make men s-x obsessed & most men are not s-x obsessed.

I actually think this train of thought is more common in the frum world, like an innocence is bliss approach, too uncomfortable to consider the alternative. You don't have to look very far in the "outside world" to see it. You can choose not to see it, but it's very obvious that men think about s-x a lot, whether it's p-rn or m-strbation or whatever, it's part of daily life if there's no halacha, I think this is common knowledge if you're not sheltered. Why that's inherently a bad thing, halacha aside, is a different matter. It's a big challenge for a frum male, sure.

Biology = must procreate = no limitations based on cycle like women have, so no reason to ever not be interested in procreation...

amother

Indigo

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 1:57 am

Most healthy men most definitely are, if not actually obsessed with s-x, pretty close to it. I would consider my husband a very healthy, normal person, and we both have very accepting open views of (halachically permissible) s-x and we've talked about this in the past. I just had the following conversation with him, verbatim:

Would it be correct to say that all men are s-x-obsessed, and it's because Hashem created them that way?

I would say so, yes

Based on your own personal experience or based on your experience with the other men in ur life?

Yeah pretty much. At least based on my experience with other men who we have the relationship necessary for this to come out

Right

But I'm pretty sure this is not disputed

Ah yes on Imamother they are smack in the midst of disputing it

Lol I guessed as much

amother

Tanzanite

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 8:49 am

amother Indigo wrote:

I don't think we can use the frum environment as a measure of this. We encourage this setup with the extreme gender separation. By stressing that in every situation or every circumstance, then that fosters such thoughts. We are conditioning men to think that merely seeing a woman is a s-xual situation. And we condition women to think that their mere existence is a s-xual concept.

I am not saying that men don't have more frequent thoughts on s-x, but that doesn't translate to s-x obsessed. When you interact with women everyday, everywhere, you're not having s-xual thoughts with every interaction.

We are just products of our environments and we're projecting that perspective onto the outside world.

amother

Tanzanite

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 8:56 am

amother Goldenrod wrote:

I’m really not getting why an oily looking sheitel is nice. And yes let’s be real what you call wet look right out the shower looks like a pot of oil was poured on your sheitel. Can we say the emperor has no clothes?

The same way loose shapeless clothing is nice. Or the same way pale, colorless clothing is nice for young children.

Style is just that - style. Style doesn't automatically mean nice.

amother

Lightcoral

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 9:09 am

I am just curious how many of those bashing the style have or have DDs with naturally frizzy-curly hair. Not the thin silky bottle curly, but the s shaped, coarse frizzy ones?

Better yet, if DD has that hair, unless you put chemicals in her hair to have it relaxed/straightened, how does she not look disheveled?

amother

Lemonchiffon

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 9:23 am

amother Lightcoral wrote:

I was thinking about this the entire thread. My dd is 5 and has curls like that and if I don’t mousse it till it’s crunchy, it looks like a massive tangled bush.
So I hope it’s tznius for someone with naturally curly hair to wear it moussed….

amother

Cappuccino

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 9:41 am

amother Pearl wrote:

in the last pic the woman's hair just looks really oily, like it hasn't been washed...

Her name is Jenna Dewan.
Her hair looks like it was made like this deliberately. Does not look like a pot of oil.
And btw this wet out of shower look the problem is that it's s*xy, not eidel.

amother

Copper

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 9:46 am

amother Lemonchiffon wrote:

There is nothing wrong with girls having a wet hair look!

Please dont take this out of proportion!!!

The wet look on a married woman will be a lot more attractive because its not usual for women to walk around with wet wigs.

Hence, why people would think its hair for a minute.

amother

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 9:55 am

amother Lightcoral wrote:

We're not discussing hair. We're discussing wigs. Wig that are deliberately made to look like one just stepped out of the shower.
(Not necessarily a curly wig. Just this ragged wet towel dried look.)

amother

Stonewash

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 10:06 am

amother OP wrote:

My sheitel macher showed me a flat flat real wet hair look. Not like this.

When I saw the OP I immediately thought of Noa Kirel in Eurovision. Is that the kind of look you meant?

It's hard to find a picture that captures it but YouTube Noa Kirel Eurovision grand final.

amother

Pearl

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 10:16 am

LovesHashem wrote:

Oh it looks like crunchy mouse in her hair. Curly girls have been wearing this look since the early 2000s. I believe others wore this look then as well, the mouse and straightening the bangs with all the wet mousy hair and watched your hair burn.

AFAIK the look originated (at least for white girls) with the advent of mousse in the 80's when I was in high school. Curls and waves were in and girls with straight hair got perms and everyone moussed and scrunched away..

amother

Goldenrod

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 10:23 am

amother Stonewash wrote:

When I saw the OP I immediately thought of Noa Kirel in Eurovision. Is that the kind of look you meant?

It's hard to find a picture that captures it but YouTube Noa Kirel Eurovision grand final.

That looks like an oil pot. Fake wet straight hair has a very greasy/ dirty look. I guess I’ll have to continue being out of style. I didn’t do the stick straight look, and now I’m not gonna do the oily look. Oh well.

amother

Pearl

Fri, Mar 01 2024, 10:31 am

originally the intent was to get the curls and waves, but if you need a lot of mousse and scrunching to get them, then it often ended up staying wet looking, so it was definitely an ubiquitous look. and then I guess in the 90's the wet look became more intentional