No one comes to us to deliver

amother

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 7:45 am

If we don't go to others to deliver, no one knocks on my door. Maybe 2 people. Dh tells me let's stay home and ppl will come to us. But they won't Confused

amother

Lightpink

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 7:53 am

I think this happens to a lot of people. Once we started the day very late. 2 people came and by the time we got to some no one was home and those people did not come while they were out delivering. I just make it about my kids giving the people they want to give to and I just give very few people.

amother

Yolk

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 8:08 am

No one comes to us either except neighbours and siblings. I couldn't care less!

I go to the popular fun places and all iss good.

amother

Silver

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 8:12 am

Also, once ppl get used to you going to them, they don't go to you.

There was one sibling I used to go across town to every single year and one year I didn't go to him and he didn't come to me probably because he was waiting and assuming I would go to him.

When I spoke to him later in the day he said he didn't get to see me and I said oh our route didn't take us near his house this year but he could have always come to us.

Next year, he did!

amother

Birch

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 8:13 am

Neighbors come and a few others....that's it. Family we do get togethers at one house. Immediate family on my side we do breakfast. My extended family we do lunch. Anyone who wants comes for Purim meal.
I only deliver to kids teachers and anyone we know in those areas so it varies by year.
This year bh we have a newborn so we will see who we get to.

amother

Apple

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 8:15 am

Personally I don’t have any friends to give to. My kids do bH.
My husband has lots of shul friends and business partners.
He also has lots of family in our neighborhood.
I don’t have any family here.
So, I just get busy making sure my family gets to see all their friends.
And I send to my immediate neighbors. Not because we’re close but because I try to be neighborly.
It ends up being busy even though I don’t have any friends to give to in my neighborhood.
Even if I want to stay home, I still want my kids to go to their teachers so we would go out for that.
It ends up being a busy day for unpopular me.

amother

Geranium

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 8:18 am

Yeah same. We don't live super far from shul but we're in a different direction from most (still hoping for a migration but it's been slow). I have a list of about 10 families we deliver to and most reciprocate if they can. I think if we didn't deliver we'd get only a couple, but I'm okay with it. Less nosh to deal with (and we still wind up with plenty) and I don't take it personally-- it's a very hectic day and a lot of people just pick a few closer neighbors to deliver to.

notshanarishona

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 8:30 am

Personally I stopped going around to deliver except the hakaras hatov ones and neighbors. Driving around Purim day is an exhausting nightmare with crazy traffic, people stopping everywhere on the wrong side of the street, etc. I started only go to people within a 10 minute walk and then I started enjoying the day so much more. It got out of hand with bringing to everyone I feel close to.

daagahminayin

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 8:32 am

If it makes you feel better, you are not alone. I think that most people deliver more mishloach manos than they receive based on this phenomenon:

amother

DarkPurple

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 8:36 am

We have so so many neighbors bh and we all go outside and give each other in the morning
I am blessed to have many many close friends outside my neighborhood, but I don’t give them on purim unless they come to me (which a few do) because it’s too hard to get around town. The rest of the day we spend in traffic going to the kids rebbes and teachers and principals and rabbanim
Then we go to some family. Friends are just not on the list, as much as if love them to be

amother

White

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 8:36 am

amother Yolk wrote:

No one comes to us either except neighbours and siblings. I couldn't care less!

I go to the popular fun places and all iss good.

Neighbors and siblings? I don't think you can relate to OP.
In my old neighborhood, no one came to us. No neighbors ever thought to exchange with us, and siblings gave us at mom's house. I was really upset when one of my siblings decided to no longer exchange with siblings.
And if I wouldn't have had family to exchange with, I would have received just one or two.
We make lots, but most are delivered before Purim, to teachers, rebbeim, therapists, bus drivers, etc.

Once we moved, I made it my business to send over to neighbors. Today we're on many neighbors' lists.

amother

Candycane

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 10:02 am

We don't deliver to almost anyone. I give to whoever comes to us or to kids we encounter at shul. When my kids are older, I hope to do more delivering.

I give the teachers theirs at school before Purim (yes, I know this means they don't count as shalach manos, but they're really just a gift card anyway with a few candies).