It is not a chiyuv to go to shul for zachur

lovelylife

Sat, Mar 23 2024, 5:15 pm

Ema of 5 wrote:

There is ALWAYS an option to ask a shaila, Halacha or not.
Can you please post a source that a woman doesn’t need to hear it from a klaf? That it is minhag and not Halacha to do so?

Please read the chinuch on the mitzvah. Mitzvah kuf reish gimel. Just learned it friday night. OP is right.

amother

Pear

Sat, Mar 23 2024, 5:21 pm

I actually really appreciate PSA like this. I had no clue it was a minhag as opposed to halacha. I didn't realize there was even room to ask. For personal reasons I can't really leave the house now and had no clue what I'd do for zachar and for megillah. After hearing this, I called my Rav (who actually leans on the side of machmir) and he told me to skip zachar this year. Megillah we worked out a way I can lein it for myself (that does have to be from a klaf, if you have an issue going then please speak to your Rav about the halachically permissible way to lein for yourself).
Thank you!

amother

Brass

Sat, Mar 23 2024, 9:09 pm

amother Cinnamon wrote:

I second this. I have few lil kids and to get myself ready with all kids is hard. I watch my neighbors go all harried as I sit home cozily.
And its not a bigger mitzva to hear it vs saying it.

Of course it’s better to hear it leined from a sefer torah then read it at home from a chumash

amother

Sunflower

Sat, Mar 23 2024, 9:46 pm

amother OP wrote:

Or if you're postpartum and don't have energy to leave the house, you may not need to go to shul.

Just wondering what exactly you mean by "don't have the energy"?

I think that if you'd get $500 if you show up for zochor then you have the energy.

If you'd really say that even for $500 you'd still stay home because you're so exhausted then maybe.

notshanarishona

Sat, Mar 23 2024, 10:59 pm

amother Sunflower wrote:

Not post partum but I will give you an example. I have a degenerative back issue and playing on the floor or having to lift my toddler causes severe pain. Sometimes I can watch him for hours and we are fine and sometimes he decides to be dangerous and needs to be held/ stopped. I have strong painkillers that work , but they make me very tired/ dizzy - can’t run around after taking them. We do get a Chessed girl who comes part of davening but the only way for me to get out Shabbos morning after a morning of watching my kids would be if my husband skipped part of shachris. Obviously his chiyuv comes first. Don’t judge. If people say they don’t have energy, believe them. It’s not like zachor is a person’s only responsibility, you are talking about getting dressed to go out after watching/ entertaining kids, setting up and preparing for a seudah. Shabbos is hard for a lot of mothers.

Ema of 5

Sat, Mar 23 2024, 11:24 pm

lovelylife wrote:

Please read the chinuch on the mitzvah. Mitzvah kuf reish gimel. Just learned it friday night. OP is right.

Then I guess my rav must be wrong. I’ll make sure to let him know.
Again, what OP SHOULD have said was that SOME hold that way, and anyone who thinks they will have a hard time getting out for whatever reason should speak to their rav.

allthingsblue

Sat, Mar 23 2024, 11:36 pm

In last weeks Family First Rav Doniel Neustadt writes
“Women who find it difficult to go to shul on Shabbos morning should read (or have someone read for them) the parsha h of zachor from a Chumash
It’s not necessary or recommended to make a special Krias Hatorah for women to hear parshas zachor.”

Elu v’elu divrei Elokim chaim

siddur

Sat, Mar 23 2024, 11:36 pm

I remember years ago ( maybe 12?) there was a big storm in the Tristate area, and there was a real chance that the Eruv would not hold up. All of the rabbonim in the community said that if a woman and husband can’t coordinate , and they have young children, the women can read Parsha zachor from a Chumash.
That was the first time I actually learned that it is not a mitzvah, but rather a ( very) accepted minhag.
The mitzvah is תמחה את זכר עמלק
The ( very ) strong and an accepted minhag is to hear it lained on parshas zachor.
* to the poster who said you can hear it on Purim morning: it is not the same leining. The Kriah ha torah for Purim day is ויבא עמלק