Who is right in this situation

GLUE

Tue, Apr 16 2024, 11:43 pm

B'Syata D'Shmya wrote:

Driving instructors are not known for their manners/mentchlichkeit!!
Whats really bothering you here? You were jolted when a kid almost got killed. Blaming the driver is an easy out, even if they are guilty, its your kid they are hurting. Please take steps to keep your kids safe.

If you are teaching someone how to drive you should always follow the rules of the road.
Is this why no one knows how to drive because when they learned to drive the driving teacher just broke every rule?

amother

Rose

Tue, Apr 16 2024, 11:45 pm

amother OP wrote:

It's not legal to stop, stand, or park there.
But my question is more about the mentchlichkeit part of it. If it was mentchlichkeit/mannered of the instructor to do what he did & if I was wrong of asking them if they can find a different place.

Absolutely not mentchlich of him. His position is that a dozen or however many children should go find somewhere else to play so he can convenience himself, and if the kids don't leave, tough on them, and if he hits one, oh well. Like really what in the world.

OP you should never have even had to say anything.

GLUE

Tue, Apr 16 2024, 11:47 pm

amother OP wrote:

You were not wrong at all.
You did not say how the children were playing, what if they were ridding bikes?
Ever heard of Share the Road? Which is legal in most states.
That means that cars can not bully people in getting off the road other people also have a right to use the street.

tichellady

Tue, Apr 16 2024, 11:48 pm

amother OP wrote:

Yes, several signs. Every few feet.

Then I agree that this was very weird. I thought you just meant that because it’s a cul de sac it’s understood that you shouldn’t park there.

I think we all agree it was weird behavior on his part

B'Syata D'Shmya

Wed, Apr 17 2024, 12:51 am

amother OP wrote:

No not menshlich but I already wrote that driving instructors are notorious for aggressive and rude behavior.
I would be careful.
Just thinking about the kids here, not right, wrong or menshlich....

Rappel

Wed, Apr 17 2024, 1:00 am

If I were teaching someone to drive, and I saw a bunch of kids, I wouldn't practice there out of common sense.

I think the instructor was being deliberate, and endangering the children at the same time. That's crazy.

WhatFor

Wed, Apr 17 2024, 6:37 am

amother OP wrote:

If it's not legal, and the instructor's argument is that it is (which you said he kept repeating) then address it to him from a legal basis. He clearly doesn't care about mentchlich so when he says it's legal, just say no it isn't, according to these signs. Forget arguing about the kids in the street, because from his perspective, if the kids shouldn't be there, then it's not his problem.

Whether it's mentchlich to have driving lessons amidst a bunch of kids, of course not, even if it's totally legal. But you can't control other people's mentchlichkeit. Whether you were wrong to ask him to go? That depends on the legality of what he was doing. If he was using the space legally, then technically you shouldn't ask him to leave because the kids should go. If he wasn't using the space legally, you have backing to go and ask him to leave. But next time, I'd tackle it from the legal perspective instead of appealing to someone's graciousness, especially when they already indicated that all they care about is the legality of it.

amother

Dimgray

Wed, Apr 17 2024, 9:22 am

amother OP wrote:

You were right but it doesn’t help if he won’t listen. Get a man to talk to him immediately if he comes back since apparently women are automatically ignored.

amother

Wed, Apr 17 2024, 10:05 am

amother Dimgray wrote:

You were right but it doesn’t help if he won’t listen. Get a man to talk to him immediately if he comes back since apparently women are automatically ignored.

Well, he did leave when he saw a man approaching...

Cheiny

Wed, Apr 17 2024, 11:21 am

amother OP wrote:

We live on a small quiet dead end, 12 families. The dead end is a no parking, no stopping, no standing zone.
The kids play at the end of the dead end where there are generally no cars. The dead end was full of kids today, and a car comes with a driving teacher & student, and they started practicing U turns & parallel parking. Right there with kids running in the back & front of the car. The kids went off the road, but they thought the car parked so they kept going back on the street to play. The driver missed a kid by afew inches several times.
I went over to the car , and asked them if they can please find a quieter place because there are kids playing there. The instructor gave me such attitude & kept saying "it's legal." He made me seem as if I'm crazy and doing something wrong by asking. He eventually went away when he saw a male neighbor approaching.
So was I wrong in this situation?

While you normally get to enjoy the fact that you’re at a dead end and the kids can play there, it’s still a public street and the driving instructor had a right to have his student practice there, away from traffic.

GLUE

Wed, Apr 17 2024, 1:08 pm

What is the role driving schools provide?
Is the goal to get you to pass the driving test or to get you comfortable to drive and learn the rules written and unwritten of the road?

If the only goal is to get you to pass the test then the driving instructor was doing what he was paid to do.

The real role a driving school should have is to teach you how to drive in different conditions and how to follow the rules of the road. The written down ones and the unwritten down ones.

A written rule is; No parking in a No stopping or Standing zone.
An unwritten rule is; Behind every bouncing ball is a running child. When you see children playing even if they are on the sidewalk expect them to run into the street. Especially if it's a quite street like a Colda Sack. Slow down when there are children around.

Definitely no teach someone how to park in a No stopping zone with kids around.
If this is a normal thing for driving schools to do, maybe when someone needs a driving school to ask how they teach and what is the goal of the driving school.

amother

Antiquewhite

Wed, Apr 17 2024, 2:13 pm

you're not going to like my response but I think kids should NOT be playing in the street. it is not safe. we live on a large cul-de-sac with very little traffic and almost no cars on shabbos but I still don't allow my kids to even walk in the street. I don't understand why this is allowed in your case. please teach them that the street is for cars and other vehicles that they should play on lawns, in the park, etc. I know this is less convenient but really, there should be a healthy respect for the street and for cars. I don't care if it's officially no standing, no parking, etc- it's still the street and not an appropriate place for kids to be playing.

amother

Wed, Apr 17 2024, 2:14 pm

Cheiny wrote:

I don't think he has rights to practice parking in a no parking zone.
Though as I said, I'm wondering more about the mentchlichkeit/mannered part of it.

amother

Wed, Apr 17 2024, 2:16 pm

amother Antiquewhite wrote:

This isn't a blanket statement. This really depends on the particular block & street. The kids play at the end of the dead end, where there are barely ever any cars there. They don't play at the beginning of the dead end where the cars turn in.
It's in general a small quiet dead end, with a speed bump at the beginning. It's not a busy street at all.

amother

Antiquewhite

Wed, Apr 17 2024, 2:21 pm

amother OP wrote:

I stand by my statement. they shouldn't be playing in the street, even in a quiet one or at the very end of a dead end where cars rarely go. it's still a public street.