What do you think of this tuition assistance policy?

amother

Wed, May 08 2024, 10:55 am

A Jewish school in my city has this policy for anyone requesting tuition assistance, and I would love to know everyone's thoughts on it, copied directly from their website:

If a family has children over the age of six, it is expected that both parents will be employed. If one parent chooses not to work, then a full time income at minimum wage will be imputed to that parent for the purposes of awards calculation.

This means if ALL of your kids are over age six and no one is still at home being cared for by a parent.

Personally, I think it's a good policy and as someone who works full time even though my dream is to be a full time homemaker, I really appreciate this.

out-of-towner

Wed, May 08 2024, 11:07 am

It makes sense in theory, and I understand why they are doing it, but on that end can the schools please make schedules that are somewhat friendly to people who actually work full time and aren't on a school schedule? Because the amont of time I would have had to take off between random school days off and school vacations and Erev YT (not everyone works for Frum companies who give off then) and kids being sick one after the other when I was working full time, had I not had a nanny at home (said nanny basically ate up most of my paycheck but I did have a baby at home with her) I would have lost my job. Oh and I have a Masters degree in a relevant and needed field.

I'm currently a SAHM for a variety of reasons, one being that in my city working full time with little ones is virtually impossible due to lack of child care. But I have a baby and 3.5 year old home with me all the time.

Wolfsbane

Wed, May 08 2024, 11:09 am

I assume this is just the official hard-line policy and that they account for those with illnesses, disabilities, and mental health conditions, as well as those who are unemployed and actively searching for work.
I would also wonder about their policy towards freelancers and those enrolled in a degree program.

amother

Offwhite

Wed, May 08 2024, 11:10 am

is the school set up for both parents to work in terms of scheduling? I feel like most arent. I think part time would probably be more reasonable, taking in account how often kids are home from school in most schools and having to take kids to therapies... unless it's in ny where therapy is at school..
I just think that fulltime with kids even if they are in school full time is hard.

I think it's fairer then penalizing the lawyer who decided to be SAHM over the one who didn't go to college.

amother

Eggshell

Wed, May 08 2024, 11:25 am

Agree that there needs to be exceptions. For example, years ago I was diagnosed with terminal cancer. I was going through chemo, surgeries, etc. and we were getting crushed with medical bills. We asked my daughters former school for a tuition break. We just didn't have the money to cover tuition and chemo at the same time. The school told us no and that we would need to find someone else to pay for us. I was crushed. We had no savings, no family to ask for help and I was honestly, so resentful of the school and others who were taking advantage and getting away with it. In the end, my husband worked it out with the school and bh, I didn't die. Now, bh bh bh, I am able to work full time and with my paycheck, cover full tuition for my kids AND help pay for others who need assistance. Even though we didn't get help when we needed it, I make sure to help others now that I can. Exceptions must be made. What I went through was absurd and no family should have to deal with that.

mig100

Wed, May 08 2024, 11:52 am

amother Eggshell wrote:

Horrible . Just horrible. How can they deny you a break

amother

Daffodil

Wed, May 08 2024, 1:13 pm

I understand it, but it does kind of rub me the wrong way.

Dictating exactly how someone must live their life feels a little invasive.

Especially when nobody gets to dictate anything to the school, not vacation schedules, not unnecessary expensive programming, not weak curriculums, not firing ineffective teachers.

amother

Oatmeal

Wed, May 08 2024, 4:31 pm

I agree with the policy as long as there are certain leniences- major medical illnesses (cancer, MS etc or a child with an illness or disability that doesnt allow them to be full time in school), short term unemployment (ie they had a job before and actively looking for a job), school that will lead to a career (as that will end up giving the school more money down the line).

I would also do this for moms who work almost no hours. Some do it to get government funding- they have to have some income and then they get certain programs or funding for childcare etc.

I work full time to pay tuition. So many moms are SAHM or work 5 hours a week. They get the tuition discount and I don't. Even though our BASIC mandatory expenses are above current income. (We lost income this past year, job loss, and they didn't care. We are both professionals).
We live pretty simply. I think twice before buying my daughter tights for Shabbos. Nothing fancy or with bows- walmart tights. I think twice before buying myself shoes. My work shoes have a hole so I am wearing my old sneakers. No clubs for the kids. Birthday parties are not even a thought now.

This policy would make me feel like the system isn't weighted against those trying to pay tuition instead of giving to people who just want everyone to pay for their life decisions like being a SAHM.

amother

Wed, May 08 2024, 4:42 pm

amother Daffodil wrote:

It’s not dictating anything. It’s saying if you chose not to work (assuming no extenuating circumstances) and then you apply for financial aid, then they will assign an imputed salary. If you cant afford tuition and are willingly not working, either get a job or find another way to pay - or accept this policy.

amother

Wed, May 08 2024, 4:43 pm

amother Oatmeal wrote:

You said it perfectly. I wish more schools would follow.

amother

DarkKhaki

Wed, May 08 2024, 4:46 pm

mummiedearest wrote:

Disagree. I think if one parent makes above a certain amount, the school really can’t require the other parent work. That doesn’t mean they won’t need assistance sometimes, circumstances differ.

I agree. It's not for anyone to decide that a mother MUST work! What if someone is weak by nature, suffers from mental health issues, looks after elderly parents etc etc...

Do people think that if a woman doesn't work she's busy with lunch dates, manicures, shopping for pleasure etc... C'mon.

amother

Clear

Wed, May 08 2024, 4:56 pm

amother Daffodil wrote:

They're not dictating how you live your life with this policy. It's just setting requirements for scholarships. Live however you want. No one is entitled to schslarship just because they want it. When most people across the board sre struggling, they chose to set minimum requirements.

Wolfsbane

Wed, May 08 2024, 5:10 pm

amother Daffodil wrote:

I think it's relevant that they're not denying scholarships to families with a SAHM - more like if the household income is, say, 100k, they'll offer you the scholarship they offer to households earning 130k.

amother

Papaya

Thu, May 09 2024, 12:45 am

I don't like that it doesn't say anything about extenuating circumstances.

There are reasons like illness, disability, caring for special needs child or elderly parent, that should still be taken into account.

Also in divorce - a spouse who is working hard to support her family shouldn't be penalized for a deadbeat spouse.