Please stop asking, and why does it matter to you

amother

Thu, May 23 2024, 8:50 pm

DH was recently in a really bad accident. B"h he is ok, but it was scary for a while.
In the meantime, after every question of how is he, the follow up is can you sue?
I mean, what in the world????
It's almost as if they are saying it would have been * worth it* if we can get some money out of it, and, ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!!
If we say yes, you want to know how much, I'll tell you we got a million dollars, then we would go through it again to get another million?? Money isn't everything.
But no, for whatever reasons we can't sue.
But please stop asking!!!

amother

Sage

Thu, May 23 2024, 8:59 pm

Oy! I feel terrible for you! People like to make stupid conversation and many people don't think before they speak! And people sue and it's 1000% the wrong thing. Every situation is different!

amother

Charcoal

Thu, May 23 2024, 9:03 pm

I don’t think someone asking if you could sue means they think it makes it worth it. Usually it would be able to help cover medical and out of work expenses, and they probably genuinely want to know if there’s at least SOMETHING that can be done to help get through the situation. I doubt their asking if your suddenly millionaires like it was worthwhile..

At least based on my own experience. I have a parent who was in a horrible accident that has lifelong repercussions. They have spent the last 15 years in and out of drs offices and hospitals, and they can’t work. I know there was a lawsuit, I don’t know how much was awarded but I know whatever it was barely made a dent. There have been people who asked me about suing, and I know they only ask because they want my parent to have some sort of way to be financially stable so that it’s not another struggle on top of a list of many other problems. It’s from a place of caring

amother

Charcoal

Thu, May 23 2024, 9:05 pm

amother Sage wrote:

Oy! I feel terrible for you! People like to make stupid conversation and many people don't think before they speak! And people sue and it's 1000% the wrong thing. Every situation is different!

Like you said, every situation is different. Please don’t make a bold statement like this. Be grateful you aren’t in a situation to have to make that decision

amother

Leaf

Thu, May 23 2024, 9:14 pm

amother Sage wrote:

Oy! I feel terrible for you! People like to make stupid conversation and many people don't think before they speak! And people sue and it's 1000% the wrong thing. Every situation is different!

Unfortunately, I know several people who were victims in cars accidents, and usually the insurance payments did not even cover enough to replace the totaled car, and they have permanent damage that will affect them for the rest of their lives and it takes money to deal with that. A law suit is sometimes the only way to recoup losses and help offset the additional expenses.

Op, I'm so sorry for your situation. People ask because they care, and maybe theu don't know the right thing to say.

amother

Petunia

Thu, May 23 2024, 9:17 pm

OP, I’m so sorry you’re in this situation.
I can assure you that NOBODY thinks it would be worth it if you could sue!!! They just are hoping for you that you aren’t stuck in deep medical and car expenses. And they really want you to have one good thing.

amother

Hosta

Thu, May 23 2024, 10:29 pm

People usually say this because they are so bothered that this happened to you/him. I find that it's usually a reaction of anger or diseblief in the circumstances.

Totally hear how it's insensitive and none of their business. But just know they aren't saying that if there is monmey involved it's worth it that the accident happened.

amother

Tuberose

Thu, May 23 2024, 10:32 pm

Why is it offensive?

They are horrified that he was hurt and want him to recoup his losses. Its not a yentish question usually. Its someone expressing frustration on your behalf.

amother

Tuberose

Thu, May 23 2024, 10:34 pm

amother Sage wrote:

Oy! I feel terrible for you! People like to make stupid conversation and many people don't think before they speak! And people sue and it's 1000% the wrong thing. Every situation is different!

Why is suing wrong?

The insurance likes to underpay and unless you sue, they wont cover physical damages or even the full value of the car.

Obviously making stuff up is insurance fraud but if you really suffered financial and physical loss, its just a legal recourse.

amother

Fri, May 24 2024, 3:41 pm

I never thought about it in terms of making money to pay bills
A. Because usually the people that are asking are just asking for "hock" and gossip, not because they really care if we can pay the bills
B. B"h we can pay bills and we have good insurance.
But that is a way to look at it to try and not let it get to me