Don't you wish?? | Imamother

miriamnechama

Tue, Nov 18 2008, 9:16 am

sunshine! wrote:

I always wonder what the point of a fancy wedding is. My grandmother had a saying "It's not the wedding that counts, it's the marriage". I think by setting high standards for weddings we are missing the point. The idea of a wedding IS the marriage. My wedding was beautiful, there were lots of people who I really cared about there, and although they weren't serving steak a'la king or roasted shallot surprise, I and all the people in attendance have wonderful memories of a beautiful Simcha.

that's what I was told too.

what is funny is my neighbour is making her 3rd bar mitzva in 2 years, 2 boys were born 11 months apart.

by the first 2 she said she spent 10thousand nis on the evening plus shabbos, and they had 700 coming, it was a come a nd go.

this boy who dreamed to have his bar motzva in a really fancy hotel is having a very simpleevening... my neighbour said she just can't putout another 10thousand nis, and she comes from a fam of 14 plus her husband and bils are cheder menahalim, plus she is due with no10, so she's making a smaller evening and a bigger shabbos kiddush.

well she said she need to take into account thashe may be making a bris as well in a month...

miriamnechama

Tue, Nov 18 2008, 9:18 am

sunshine! wrote:

I sure felt like a princess... and when I look at my wedding picture, I still can't believe that the fairy tale bride is me.... Don't get me wrong, my wedding was a beautiful event, in a proper hall, but there were no extras like 8 course meals, 7 piece bands, and thousands of dollars worth of fresh flowers that go to waste when the affair is over. I didn't feel "gypped" out of one detail.

hey I insisted on artificial flowers.. and I have them untill today...

Ruchel

Tue, Nov 18 2008, 9:25 am

Really sad when parents don't take the number of children into account... really sad and unfair.

My dh, only son, had a huge thing (parents sent 3000 invites!) at the kotel then King David (I think). But guess what, he was disappointed! Because not one friend attended (raised in Switzerland), almost only adults except some older teens (cousins).

So yeah, there are beautiful pictures and it sounds classy.

But I still prefer my little homey bat mitzva at my grandparents (we don't do at shul) with fun kids and cousins, and my family.

shnitzel

Tue, Nov 18 2008, 10:00 am

I also felt like a princess - I chose the dress (from a gemach) and looked beautiful in hair and makeup but our wedding was done as simply and cheaply as possible - regular dinner for family (which I b"H have a lot of) and buffet later for the other guests of which we had well over 300 - all close friends, I don't think I danced with the same person twice all night. My wedding was beautiful but who needs to spend tons on fancy flowers and benchers and food, I'd rather have tons of people happy with me, and they were my chuppah seated a few hundred and there was barely room for evereyone who didn't have seats to stand. I'd rather that than a small wedding with barely any friends.