Gift Fot Having Us For Pessach

de_goldy

Mon, Apr 04 2011, 11:22 pm

I think there was a thread about this recently. I would pay for some of the yom tov expenses such as cleaning help, meat, grocery orders etc. Keep in mind how much you would be spending if you were making pesach yourself and give appropriately.

Grandmama

Tue, Apr 05 2011, 1:38 am

Money is the best gift of all, and unless they are multi millionaires, the most appropriate gift.
If they were extraordinarily wealthy, I would break my head to figure out just the perfect thing that they were in need of, but otherwise money is the easiest and most suitable gift to give.

I agree with the other thread, whatever Pesach would cost you at home, and figure it out with pen and paper if necessary, that is the amount you give at the very minimum. At the maximum, is the amount a hotel would be charging for the length of your stay. Or something in between. Whatever you can generously afford.

amother

Tue, Apr 05 2011, 1:51 am

I'm not the OP but I have the same question except that our relative is having us davka because we can't afford Pesach, we aren't even able to buy groceries or pay rent from last month...but we would also like to show our appreciation to them...any creative ideas? thanks

Shopmiami49

Tue, Apr 05 2011, 5:22 am

We spent Pesach with family friends last year and when we offered to pay part of the expenses, they were sort of insulted! What we ended up doing was we told them that we "preferred" to bring our own wine and matzos for the seder, we bought a bunch of dairy products that we knew our kids would eat, and basically made it out to be like this was easier for us than having them find all the stuff we needed. That way, we were still able to chip in without insulting them.

We also bought a game for their kids for Pesach - it was pretty cheap and very much appreciated. I also tried to help out with babysitting while I was there as much as possible, so as not to a burden, but rather a help.

If you know of something in particular that they need for their house and it's affrordable for you, that would make a great present.

A different time when we spent Y"T with a family, I racked my brains to figure out what in the world to get the family who had it all. I ended up making a collage for the girls with pictures of them and they really loved that. It was creative, homey, and useful (for decorating their room). I had all the supplies handy (mainly paper, scissors, glue, ribbons, buttons, etc.) and I paid about $1.00 for printing pictures. that was it! Oh, and it took me about 15 minutes from start to finish, so it wasn't like it zapped my time either.

Hatzlacha!

Liba

Tue, Apr 05 2011, 5:25 am

If you live in a major Jewish center where things like matzah and meat can be purchased cheaper than where they are you could offer to pick up those staples for them. Even if they pay you back for some or all of it it could still be a huge help.

geemum

Tue, Apr 05 2011, 5:41 am

Personally, I don't think money is a nice gift, unless you know that is what they would want.
To me, a gift is something you think this person/family will like and use and appreciate.

Ideas:
Pesach Cookbook (I highly recommend the Tamar Ansh one)
Salad Bowl for pesach (and they can use after for chometz)
Toy for their children
Digital photo frame

Raisin

Tue, Apr 05 2011, 7:29 am

amother wrote:

I would get a nice toy their kids can play with on yom tov. And/or maybe a kitchen item they need - something like an immersion blender is inexpensive and useful.

I think money or buying some of the food (if you can afford it) is a nice idea but it depends on your relationship with them. If they won't take money a gift card to a shop they often go to would be a nice idea. Maybe a homewares shop since people often buy things there before pesach.

You can't go too wrong with a couple of cases of wine.

Tablepoetry

Tue, Apr 05 2011, 7:45 am

Are you going for the whole pesach or just the seder? That makes a big difference.
Anyway, I wouldn't offer money, unless you are very very close. Most people would find it weird or offensive, I think.
You can definitely bring matza and/or wine. I would also bring a pesach gift. This depends on your financial situation and your relationship with the hosts......also on the culture and the country.....so you are going to get a lot of different answers on a board like this. Personally, I would get something bigger than a cookbook or box of chocolates. Maybe a fancy vase, or a set of elegant serving dishes, or a beautiful tablecloth, or a big plant in a gorgeous pot....if you know them well you can get more creative. I've heard this year of someone giving a BBQ grill, someone else giving an expensive linen set, and a third person buying a garden swing. Of course these wouldn't fly in most situations, but only you know your host and your relationship. And what they want/need.

For the poster who is being hosted because she can't afford to stay home.... I'm sure the hosts understand that. Anything symbolic will be appreciated in such a situation.