should I quit? | Imamother

amother

Fri, May 20 2011, 3:33 am

Hi. So here's a story...I am a single mom of three. the youngest child is turning 1 years old this month. I haven't been working and at home with kids until they were 3. I found a job which I love and this is the first time me working in a long time. I am really lucky they hired me due to economy and lack of jobs. so the job is a full time job frm 9 to 5. now I have a problem. first of all I feel guilty leaving my baby because he is so small and still nursing. and another issue is I can't afford a babysitter which is like $10 if they come to me. I don't want to take him out since he is still small and hours are too long. should I quit?

bubby

Fri, May 20 2011, 3:50 am

No. You need to work, both financially & for your own sake. I would strongly suggest you stop nursing (she ducks for the barrage of abuse) because he's not so little & let's face it, if there are no allergies, cow's milk is fine at this age. That will def make your life less stressed.

Look for a babysitter nearer your work if poss, or at least outside your home. Saves $. My DDIL takes her baby (10 weeks) to a babysitter from 9:30 to 4. No car, so she has to shlep in the monsoons we've been having, snow, heatwave, whatever & it is nowhere near her work. She still has to get back from the babysitter, a good 10 minute walk at least, after a long day. But it is much cheaper.

amother

Fri, May 20 2011, 4:00 am

bubby, youre the best!!!!! thank you so much for the encouragement. I felt so down and stuck I feel a little better now. thank you.

TwinsMommy

Fri, May 20 2011, 1:42 pm

I'm extremely pro stay at home mommyhood if the husband is making enough of an income that mom doesn't have to work.

but if there is no husband in the picture..... if you're not working..... money doesn't just fall from the sky unless you have an extremely generous ex husband who's just handing you money. Of course you have to work!

My husband doesn't make enough money for me to be a stay at home mom. So I work. It's hard and it's a lot of juggling and I don't really want to at this point but I've got to do what I've got to do. On the other hand I refuse to be a work outside the house full timer so I work part time at home to try and get the best of both worlds. If I were a single mom I'd have to work full time.

chocolate moose

Fri, May 20 2011, 2:47 pm

OP, find a babysitter that is warm and nurturing and that your kids will love. I found a really great chassidische lady and we were really happy.

I always worked full time; there's no feeling like being able to pay your bills and then some !

happy chick

Fri, May 20 2011, 3:00 pm

I agree to take the baby out and save money. 1 yr old is not sol little. I've been taking both kids out to a babysitter since they were 6 weeks old. now that I have 2 kids at the babysitter, it would have been the same money to have a babysitter in my house, but I still chose to take them out. its good to get out a little even its just for a few minutes and a change of schenery is good as well.

Kayza

Fri, May 20 2011, 3:12 pm

And how are you going to feed the other two kids and yourself without a job?

Please don't tell me welfare - I don't know where you live, but workfare is a fact of life in most of the US, and the fact that you have an almost one year old is NOT going to make a difference. At least here you have some choices in your job. In nyc, you would probably wind up doing clean up for the Parks Department (I'm not kidding.)

I agree that taking the baby out is much cheaper, and if you choose carefully, it can be a very good experience. My older kids really loved their babysitter.