Home

How do we know what our personal mission is?
Previous  1, 2, 3  Next  Last >>
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Interesting Discussions

Report offensive ad

View latest: 24h 48h 72h


manyhats









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 7:21 am
Raisin,

Your tafkid?

HMM!

A raisin

in every bite


raisin bran



Nimshal ?



A Raisin

in every


Imamother



hashkafa


thread


Bracha
Back to top

ChossidMom









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 7:34 am
ora_43 wrote:
HindaRochel wrote:
I don't think we necessarily know our true mission. Our true mission could simply be giving a complete stranger a smile and a hello; that could be it.

I don't think we are suppose to live our lives trying to discover our mission. Rather we are (imho) suppose to live our lives upholding Torah law in such a way that we complete our mission in a positive way.

Yes
I love the way you put this.

shalhevet wrote:
I don't think the question is so much the grandiose one of what our mission is in life. I think it is more on an hour to hour or minute to minute basis - what is my tafkid now? If my baby is crying, my tafkid is obviously not to daven shmone esrei now. But maybe it will be 2 hours later when the baby is sleeping or 2 years later when he is in gan.

Yes to this too.


I agree.

I think more in terms of "What does Hashem want from me right now".

When I was working in Hi tech for 25 years I was doing my job but also trying to make a kiddush Hashem as a Torah Jew acting mentchlich. Now, I've been home for the last 5 years and I try to be the best Chossidmom I can be. In my case, I am helping my husband build a business. I am busy all day with my house, my kids, our business and some chesed (as if the stuff I mentioned isn't chesed lol). But, again, my youngest is only 5 and I also have a daughter with special needs. So I really do have alot on my plate and I don't exactly have the time and energy to contemplate my tafkid in life.

Quite honestly, I think I'm fulfilling it. What I need to focus on more is working on my midos and perfecting this interesting personality God gave me Wink
Back to top

zaq









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 9:14 am
I think you choose your own mission.
Back to top

PinkFridge









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 9:16 am
HindaRochel wrote:
ora_43 wrote:
HindaRochel wrote:
What is a men's responsibility vis-a-vis women? (and it isn't simply learning Torah.) Shouldn't they be azer kenegdos as well?

Of course not. Who wants a man deciding whether or not they're moving in the right direction? Wink


LOL I've tried dozen's of times to explain to my dh that I'm always right!


Or as the saying goes, I would agree with you but then we'd both be wrong.

Honestly there is enough of a difference between men and women that the ezer thing wouldn't work in the other direction, and women have to employ it with the greatest of chochma.

Grandmama, I'm not disputing your position. And thanks for answering my question.

I think that most of us are so busy in life that putting one foot in front of the next is a great accomplishment. If we can do it with menucha (great book, The Menucha Principle by Shaya Ostrov) and make the Shem Shamayim misaheiv al yadeinu at theme time, well, that's deep enough for me.
Back to top

amother






Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 9:51 am
I feel that mine is to work on myself, and perfect my character traits. like patience for one. feeling calm more often, as it affects my house and family. communication, with my husband, children, family, friends, and HASHEM most importantly. I feel I can give a lot more of myself to those around me, and thats what I aim for. Basically to emulate HASHEM and to bring Moshiach closer with each positive action. I think everyone has something to work on. Nobody is perfect.
Back to top

Grandmama









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 10:12 am
Depressed wrote:
Grandmama..this may be one valid shita. I dont know every opinion out there. I do know that I became frum through Chabad, and that for sure isnt their Hashkafa. When I first started out, if I was told that Im merely an accessory/broodmere/thing without any really intrinsic value I would of run so fast from Judiasm.

The Baal HaTanya said if a man learned all that a woman is mehuyiv to know they would call him HaRav HaGaon. The Tzemach Tzedek said every Jew male and female comes down on this world to light it up with Chasidus...


Well I am not Lubavitch, so I don't know what they teach. I did go to Bais Rivka Seminary for a year, and found the study of Tanya quite interesting, as well as the deep tehillim classes.
Kabbala is everyone's.
While women are not second class citizens in Judaism, women are definitely given their roles in the home, and assisting with anything so that their husbands can grow in Torah and Yiras Shomayim. A man gets married so that he should stay away from sin. His mitzva is to have children, not our mitzva. A woman does not have to get married, and a woman's tafkid can just be to help her father or brother, if she never gets married. Women are not megulgal, unless they want to come back to assist the men in their previous lives. This is also in Kabballa, that men are megulgal because they need to come back to correct things. The woman is coming back of her own free will, she doesn't have to. I don't think kabballa is taught to most women, as even men don't learn it until they are older.
I believe we are all placed in a certain time and certain circumstances for a reason. We are pulled in the direction that we want to go, and Hashem helps us achieve our goals in life.
Women and men still have their defined roles, a man has to daven three times a day and learn Torah, a woman can be exempt from whatever she has to while she is raising the family.
While the man is the head of his household, the woman is his neck, she moves the head in the direction she wants it to go. Everything depends on the woman, the wisdom of the woman is what builds the foundations of a true Jewish home, a bayis neeman byisroel.
Back to top

HindaRochel









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 10:34 am
I never heard that about megulgal before; I heard we all need to come back to correct errors; how does a woman "correct" her past mistakes according to this idea Grandmama?

Azer kenegdo is actually a very strong position from my understanding.
Back to top

Grandmama









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 10:40 am
HindaRochel wrote:
I never heard that about megulgal before; I heard we all need to come back to correct errors; how does a woman "correct" her past mistakes according to this idea Grandmama?

Azer kenegdo is actually a very strong position from my understanding.


Who knows? We never make mistakes, do we? Very Happy

This is all not for our level of understanding, I think its one of the things we expect Moshiach to explain to us along with all the other mysteries of life.
Back to top

shabbatiscoming









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 10:47 am
Grandmama wrote:
A woman does not have to get married, and a woman's tafkid can just be to help her father or brother, if she never gets married.
Grandmama, I am seriously interested what you think: what if a woman never marries, does not have brothers and her father is no longer living? Then what? Then what is her tafkid (according to your shita?)
Back to top

PinkFridge









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 11:29 am
Grandmama, this is very interesting and I'm not contesting it, but I do wonder where and how you learned this.
Back to top

amother






Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 12:26 pm
One POV is to focus on what's most difficult for you, that is probably your nisayon.

OTOH is the view to focus on your strengths bec. those are the unique tools Hashem gave you, and using them will fulfill your unique tafkid.

There is a kiddush Hashem you can make, a way of revealing Hashem in the world, that no other person can do. By being aware of your choices and enriching your relationship to Hashem, in whatever way works for you (listening to shiurim, saying Tehilim, being a great wife & mother & thinking about how that's what Hashem wants you to be doing) you will make the right decision(s) when it/they appear.

But you need to find something that will help you grow in ruchnius, in whatever way you find suitable.

Rebbetzin Ausband says that, while it's true that women have not mitzva of Talmud Torah, how can they forge & strengthen a relationship with Hashem if they don't study His words?

The trick is to find the way to incorporate that into your busy schedule. I kept trying to find a chavrusa, & none ever seemed to work out. At night, I am way too tired to go out to a shiur. I finally started to download shiurim that I can listen to on my little mp3 player while I walk, peel potatoes, mend, etc.
Back to top

chocolate moose









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 1:04 pm
Isn't it something that's hard for us ?
Back to top

zaq









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 2:19 pm
Why should it be easy? The harder the project, the greater the credit. Or not, considering the sachar for shiluach haken is the same as for kibbud av va'em. Maybe that's the KBH's way of leveling the playing field and letting the sweathogs score some big points that they wouldn't be able to otherwise.
Back to top

PinkFridge









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 2:28 pm
Two thoughts from Rabbi Reisman's shiur of last week:
- On the saying, "Hashem only gives you what you can handle." Not necessarily. Some situations are nisyonos, that it's up to us to transcend, and others are just our pekele. We don't know, and we have to act as if it's a nisayon that we can pass. But it's impossible to say as it's happening.

- Bechira doesn't mean doing what you want to do. Animals do what they want to do too. It's making a choice to do something even if it's not necessarily what you want to do.
Back to top

amother






Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 3:26 pm
Well, there's a famous story, though I can't remember the details, about a man who thought he lost all his savings & kept fainting, til someone whispered it was found (although he didn't know it was true) but he said he know it could not be, because HKBH only gives us what we can handle, & since the man kept fainting, it was obviously more than he could handle, so it couldn't be his nisayon...

I don't want to Ch"V disagree w Rav Reisman, who's a much bigger T'Ch than I am. But I always understood that we do have the ability to withstand any nisayon that's made for us. We do have the bechira to choose to fail at that nisayon, whether it means not seeking the help you need to get through it or whatever. Or, another way to put it, is that you make certain choices that put you in a situation where you can be overcome with taiva, and at that point the taiva might be too strong to resist, but somewhere along the way you could have made different decisions that would have put you somewhere else.

Rav Ausband in Cleveland says "HKBH does the very best possible thing for every person, given the circumstances in which they have placed themselves with their own bechira"

But this is taking us way off on a tangent...no?

The dif. between focusing on your hardest challenge vs. focusing on what your strengths are, is perhaps similar to the two shitos of the "Gadlus hoOdom" (Slabodka) vs. the "Ich bin a gornisht" school of mussar (Novardok).
Back to top

penguin









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 3:27 pm
Grandmama, DH is shocked at your statement, he would like to hear a source!
Back to top

eschaya









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 3:43 pm
A few points...
- Isn't every person's mission to work towards perfecting himself? Towards that end, we can look at our weaknesses and know where our areas for improvements are, and we can to at our strengths as the tools we have towards that mission. I was once taught that just as every tradesman carries a pack with the tools of his trade, every one of us has been given our pack with the tools we need to fulfill our "trade". We don't remember what career we were assigned to, but by looking into the briefcase of tools Hashem gave us, we can get clues to that ultimate career goal.
- I strongly disagree with the POV that our role as women is merely to help our husbands. When thinking about my tafkid in life, I don't see myself as a female (vs male) but as a neshama. Hashem chose to put my neshama in this woman's body, but that shouldn't define and limit my role and goals. It's definitely a part of my mission as a frum woman, but by no means the entirety or even majority of my mission. (and what about women who aren't married... do they have no role in life but to yearn endlessly?!Smile
- Wouldn't it be nice to have a Navi to help us?
- Specifically to the OP: most of us don't have dramatic, attention grabbing missions. True, Sarah Schenirer changed the path of Jewish women's education, Devorah was a neviyah, Esther saved the Jewish people, and there are a few others like that. Most of our missions involve bettering ourselves and our families, bringing nachas to Hashem and our communities, and helping others; all these in whatever capacities we are able, using the unique strengths we were given and through overcoming the specific challenges and burdens Hashem feels are necessary for our development.
Back to top

PinkFridge









  


Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 5:09 pm
[quote="amother"]Well, there's a famous story, though I can't remember the details, about a man who thought he lost all his savings & kept fainting, til someone whispered it was found (although he didn't know it was true) but he said he know it could not be, because HKBH only gives us what we can handle, & since the man kept fainting, it was obviously more than he could handle, so it couldn't be his nisayon...

I don't want to Ch"V disagree w Rav Reisman, who's a much bigger T'Ch than I am. But I always understood that we do have the ability to withstand any nisayon that's made for us. We do have the bechira to choose to fail at that nisayon, whether it means not seeking the help you need to get through it or whatever. Or, another way to put it, is that you make certain choices that put you in a situation where you can be overcome with taiva, and at that point the taiva might be too strong to resist, but somewhere along the way you could have made different decisions that would have put you somewhere else.]

We do have the ability...IF it IS a nisayon. Now that might be clear if someone's dx with cancer, e.g., the only nisayon there is how one handles it, but not if one will live. But what I gleaned was, sometimes there are other difficult situations we're put in that we might not have the ability to transcend.
Back to top

amother






Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 5:11 pm
Quote:
there are other difficult situations we're put in that we might not have the ability to transcend.


Sorry, I'm just not getting this. Did he give any examples?
Back to top

amother






Post  Fri, May 27 2011, 5:15 pm
PinkFridge wrote:
Two thoughts from Rabbi Reisman's shiur of last week:
- On the saying, "Hashem only gives you what you can handle." Not necessarily. Some situations are nisyonos, that it's up to us to transcend, and others are just our pekele. We don't know, and we have to act as if it's a nisayon that we can pass. But it's impossible to say as it's happening.

- Bechira doesn't mean doing what you want to do. Animals do what they want to do too. It's making a choice to do something even if it's not necessarily what you want to do.


dh came home and told us what Rabbi Reisman said regarding this and we were surprised. I know of other Rabbis-including our own, who say that whatever you're given you're able to handle. I guess different views.
Back to top
Previous  1, 2, 3  Next  Last >> Recent Topics

Page 2 of 3 View latest: 24h 48h 72h


Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Interesting Discussions

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Need a Personal organizer for me (or ADD coach)
by amother
17 Sun, Oct 07 2018, 4:17 pm View last post
Male personal trainer lkwd
by amother
3 Thu, Oct 04 2018, 2:07 pm View last post
ISO Personal Injury Defense Attorney NY
by amother
0 Thu, Aug 30 2018, 8:03 am View last post
Help me plan a full day at Coronado and mission bay San dieg
by amother
5 Wed, Aug 15 2018, 1:47 am View last post
Feedback on Barry Kantrowitz personal injury lawyer Chesnut
by amother
0 Tue, Jul 31 2018, 10:41 am View last post

Jump to:  



Report offensive ad